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Printabletackam said: Yeah, but I pretty much only meet people online, so I think the culture is a little different. For me, it has been about 50/50, as far as who contacted who.
I enjoy being asked, I guess. But how the first date was initiated is such a small thing compared to how the first date WENT.  I am SOOPER leery about that. http://www.facebook.com/p...111?ref=ts
y'all gone keep messin' around wit me and turn me back to the old me...... | |
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ButterscotchPimp said: tackam said: Yeah, but I pretty much only meet people online, so I think the culture is a little different. For me, it has been about 50/50, as far as who contacted who.
I enjoy being asked, I guess. But how the first date was initiated is such a small thing compared to how the first date WENT. I am SOOPER leery about that. What, the online thing? Why? "What's 'non-sequitur' mean? Do I look it up in a Fag-to-English dictionary?" | |
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I did back in junior high school 
But I couldn't do it now. | |
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CarrieMpls said: I admit, if a guy approaches me while I'm out walking around by myself in public my gut reaction is just "no". "Go away". I have a hard time getting past that. There’s some instinct in me that just HATES being approached like that. I think it’s cause I feel like any guy who hits on women in the street probably chases anything in a skirt. And that’s just so not attractive.
I've done this a few times, but of course it should be limited to those cases where there has been looks and / or smiles exchanged. Initially I just did it a few times in order to try to get over my shyness, but it also lead basically to the best dates of my life. I admit that It's a rather unusual thing to do over here, though. I just think it's far less questionable or off-putting than picking up drunken women at bars, which is basically the standard way "to meet women" over here. It gets even shadier when you're supposed to be even buying drinks for the woman. I've never understood how that would be considered somehow more normal. | |
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tackam said: ButterscotchPimp said: I am SOOPER leery about that. What, the online thing? Why? Too easy for the other person to be completely deceitful. You show up and YIKES!!! http://www.facebook.com/p...111?ref=ts
y'all gone keep messin' around wit me and turn me back to the old me...... | |
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peacenlovealways said: Never did and never will....I think it's more romantic if they do it.
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CarrieMpls said: I admit, if a guy approaches me while I'm out walking around by myself in public my gut reaction is just "no". "Go away". I have a hard time getting past that. There’s some instinct in me that just HATES being approached like that. I think it’s cause I feel like any guy who hits on women in the street probably chases anything in a skirt. And that’s just so not attractive.
As for the topic, I don’t imagine myself ever asking a guy out in the future. I really do prefer to be pursued. But it’s sooooo difficult. I think the only reason I’ve had to sorta make the first move in the past is guys can’t tell if I’m interested or not. I’m positively terrible at flirting. It just doesn’t come naturally to me. And I’m unbearably shy to boot.On the one hand, I feel like I'm going to start asking guys out more, because I don't care so much anymore if they say no. It's not like I have anything to lose and I don't have many expectations either. Whatever!!! (although I only seem to be able to do it through email, which is probably kind of dumb -- but then again, it gives them space and time to respond, or not respond, which I think makes it easier on both parties than being confronted in person) On the other hand, I really need to know if a guy likes me and if he's serious, and that dynamic only seems to come about when they are pursuing me and taking the risk to ASK ME OUT. Those are the only relationships that have worked for me for any amount of time. Probably because the guys I naturally fall for, to the extent that I would ask them out, are a-holes.  | |
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ButterscotchPimp said: tackam said: What, the online thing? Why? Too easy for the other person to be completely deceitful. You show up and YIKES!!! I've never had that experience. I don't see why a person would go through the trouble. I guess I always figure that a bad date won't kill me, so if I don't like them in person, who cares? Still way better than the crapshoot of hanging out in bars or whatever. "What's 'non-sequitur' mean? Do I look it up in a Fag-to-English dictionary?" | |
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sextonseven said: sammij said:  you're such a liar. you clearly don't see how women look at you Thanks but women confuse me. What I think is a look usually turns out to be just something caught in their eye. 
you lie AND you're funny, dangerous combination  [...i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...] | |
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thejason said: RenHoek said: my wife proposed to me... does that count?
 what did you say??? yesh dearesht!! hic!! 
. [Edited 1/22/10 13:41pm] A working class Hero is something to be ~ Lennon |
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moderatorI've given a guy my #, asked another to a show. But I'm shy so it took guts to do both & neither turned out to be worth the effort
   I never met you, but I LOVE you & I will forever!! Thank you for being YOU - my little Princey, the best to EVER do it | |
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Well, since chivalry is DEAD now, we gals have no choice but 2 ask a guy out, if we ever wanna go out. More and more of my guy friends say they wish a woman would pursue them for a change...blah, blah, blah....so it is what it is. "Bring friends, bring your children and bring foot spray 'cause it's gon' be funky." ~ Prince
A kiss on the lips, is betta than a knife in the back ~ Sheila E Darkness isn't the absence of light, it's the absence of U ~ Prince | |
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SHOCKADELICA1 said: Well, since chivalry is DEAD now, we gals have no choice but 2 ask a guy out, if we ever wanna go out. More and more of my guy friends say they wish a woman would pursue them for a change...blah, blah, blah....so it is what it is.
Chivalry is far from dead... 
it's just harder to find... A working class Hero is something to be ~ Lennon |
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SHOCKADELICA1 said: More and more of my guy friends say they wish a woman would pursue them for a change...
So, what's wrong with that? Aren't we all equal? [Edited 1/22/10 14:03pm] | |
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I'm far too shy to ask a guy out, but I don't mind suggesting that he ask me out...
Example: "Ohh, you like that band? I love them! If you are ever going to see them or something, you should let me know...Maybe I could go with you or something, so you won't have to go alone..." That's about as bold as I get  If you will, so will I | |
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thekidsgirl said: I'm far too shy to ask a guy out, but I don't mind suggesting that he ask me out...
Example: "Ohh, you like that band? I love them! If you are ever going to see them or something, you should let me know...Maybe I could go with you or something, so you won't have to go alone..." That's about as bold as I get Girrrrrl... once you develop constant boldness - you'll be SO fuckin dangerous.  [...i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...] | |
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uPtoWnNY said: SHOCKADELICA1 said: More and more of my guy friends say they wish a woman would pursue them for a change...
So, what's wrong with that? Aren't we all equal? [Edited 1/22/10 14:03pm] Nope! "Bring friends, bring your children and bring foot spray 'cause it's gon' be funky." ~ Prince
A kiss on the lips, is betta than a knife in the back ~ Sheila E Darkness isn't the absence of light, it's the absence of U ~ Prince | |
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sammij said: thekidsgirl said: I'm far too shy to ask a guy out, but I don't mind suggesting that he ask me out...
Example: "Ohh, you like that band? I love them! If you are ever going to see them or something, you should let me know...Maybe I could go with you or something, so you won't have to go alone..." That's about as bold as I get Girrrrrl... once you develop constant boldness - you'll be SO fuckin dangerous. Thanks muffin! 
I like your confidence a lot. Send me some of that so we can be dangerous together! If you will, so will I | |
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sextonseven said: sammij said: you're such a liar. you clearly don't see how women look at you Thanks but women confuse me. What I think is a look usually turns out to be just something caught in their eye. omg
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ButterscotchPimp said: jone70 said: Maybe try a different venue where people aren't likely to go in groups. Volunteer somewhere or join an organization. NY Cares is great for volunteering -- they have all different types of opportunities and you never know who you may meet. If you play sports you could join Urban Professionals or NY Sports and Social maybe. thank you very much for the suggestions!!! You're welcome. I also just had another thought: if you were in a fraternity or went to college you might look around to see if those have local alumni chapters. Both of my alma maters organize events in NYC; especially the one that is located in New York. The check. The string he dropped. The Mona Lisa. The musical notes taken out of a hat. The glass. The toy shotgun painting. The things he found. Therefore, everything seen–every object, that is, plus the process of looking at it–is a Duchamp. | |
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thekidsgirl said: sammij said: Girrrrrl... once you develop constant boldness - you'll be SO fuckin dangerous. Thanks muffin!
I like your confidence a lot. Send me some of that so we can be dangerous together! But of course 
Though, I was certain some rubbed off on you when we booby-kissed at the bar that one night...  [...i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...] | |
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| would never EVER ask a man out! | |
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sextonseven said: sammij said: you're such a liar. you clearly don't see how women look at you Thanks but women confuse me. What I think is a look usually turns out to be just something caught in their eye. Hey Sexton, I think I might be coming to NYC this spring. Wanna see American Idiot the Musical with me? | |
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Fauxie said: evenstar3 said: I did tonight!
He said yes  Though to be fair, he asked me out first initially & we've been out a couple times, but otherwise he seems too shy to make a move...so I'm gonna get over my own crippling shyness and go for it this weekend 
I have asked out people on first dates in the past, some like it, some don't. 
Crippling shyness... I know all about that. So glad I don't need to work on overcoming that anymore.The funny thing is that it's just with him, for whatever reason. I don't get as nervous/shy with anyone else! | |
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heartbeatocean said: sextonseven said: Thanks but women confuse me. What I think is a look usually turns out to be just something caught in their eye. Hey Sexton, I think I might be coming to NYC this spring. Wanna see American Idiot the Musical with me? I would love to! | |
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sextonseven said: heartbeatocean said: Hey Sexton, I think I might be coming to NYC this spring. Wanna see American Idiot the Musical with me? I would love to! not rejected!  I have a trip to LA in the works, and then NYC... | |
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In theory I would love to ask a guy out. I think its a bold move. But I am terribly shy when it comes to guys so he would probably have to ask me out. However, since I have never been on a date, maybe its time for a new approach
Any guys wanna go out on a date? lol I mean, asking a guy out on the internet is a step, right? | |
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heartbeatocean said: sextonseven said: I would love to! not rejected! I have a trip to LA in the works, and then NYC...Of course I wouldn't reject you!  We have to go to the Film Forum when you're here. Or the IFC center.  | |
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I posted my response earlier, but in reading some responses, I had a thought - I don't think I've ever said "I love you" first either.  ACRYLIC
I do nothing professionally. I only do things for fun. johnart: Acrylic's old bras is where tits of all sizes go to frolic after they die. Tit Heaven. | |
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evenstar3 said: Fauxie said:
Crippling shyness... I know all about that. So glad I don't need to work on overcoming that anymore.The funny thing is that it's just with him, for whatever reason. I don't get as nervous/shy with anyone else! THAT is a sign you really like the person. | |
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