AnotherLover2 said:

gives AnotherLover2 some cold water, and a shoulder massage

The correct answer to who pays for dinner is: the one who makes the highest salary. The other one pays the tip or buys a round of drinks or whatever they can afford...

AnotherLover2 said:

You think they get that connection and evolved living etc. without sex? Come on now. I know what I may be saying may be outraggeous and make some angry etc but its the truth. If you dont like it then you should cease conversing with me about this. You insulted me twice personally just for espousing my views truthfully and honestly. I could immediately come up under another name and give the answers etc that would make it seem like "now thats a great guy" etc. and everyone would swoon.

AnotherLover2 said:

I see the smle face but I just know you arent alluding to me being ignorant just because you dont hear touchy feely? Because that would be ignorant.

AnotherLover2 said:

Who pays for the condoms for after dinner?

rdhull said:

I would not ever deny the power of sex within a relationship. But tying sex to everything involved in the relationship between 2 people (including expecting it for paying for dinner) is just not accurate. I did not personally insult you--I told you how your words made you look to me, and gave you the opportunity to clarify your views.

AnotherLover2 said:

It's a barter?Especially on a first date. The guy usually pays and depending upon how much he pays(the cheap side or the expensive side of the menu) he may expect SEX!
In the words of DL Hugley "YOU DO KNOW YOU ARE ORDERING ON THE FUCKING SIDE OF THE MENU?"

rdhull said:

In other words--am I calling you ignorant? No. Do I expect to hear "touchy feely" or "storybook"--no. Do I look for men to be in touch with more than just their libido and not do the male posturing/sex fiend act when they talk about women--yes.

RD, you done really stepped in it now!

lol @ rd all over this thread.

But you better hush now, you are letting out too many trade secrets (not that it bothers me, but I'm thinkin about the other fellas).

4LOVE said:

No, he may not "expect" sex, no matter what he pays. If he's buying merely to pass the time til he gets laid, why even bother with dinner? Might as well just put it on the line...

Supernova said:

I havent stepped in anything It just sems like I did because I speak the truth and its uncomfortable to some to see it in their face up close lol.

AnotherLover2 said:

You may be on to something. Guys, the next time you ask a woman out to dinner for some booty - dispense with the formalities...just tell her how much her booty is worth to you!

rdhull said:

You speak your truth, rdhull, and no one else's. Let them speak it for themselves. I know men want sex and I know that dating is a mating ritual--I'm not naive. But I'm saying, there's more to relationships between men and women than expecting her to fuck you just cause you bought dinner. (Not that you'd care that that's the only reason she'd be screwing you...)

LaVisHh said:

"A chicken breast and a couple of glasses of wine, and maybe some soup"

AnotherLover2 said:

And their ARE men in touch with more than the libido..Do I have to put a disclaimer on EVERY point saying "in general"..I know I do because people reading will not get it but i aint got time to do all of that every time..but Im just saying dont discount that libido..ever. Even the sweetest of the sweetest guy has libido affecting them.

For example the story you gave a while back about meeting someone after online meet greetings, phone talks etc...now didnt he seem like someone who was deep? now what happened? Yall met and all that sweet sensible deep shit he was talkin all went out the window now didnt it? and he never showed up again.

LaVisHh said:

I did that, and got the booty for half the price of dinner

rdhull said:

And I (almost) do NOT believe you'd stoop so low as to use something you know very well was painful for me to make a point. That was completely unnecessary and had nothing to do with this.

AnotherLover2 said:

Phew,and ya coulda fooled me...you were on some Princess bride shit



hey Im all about romance, reading together etc...label me a neanderthal if you will but just because I speak of what generally is going on with MANY doesnt mean I dont have deep relationships etc beyond sex..I know that may seem foreign. And it also doesn';t mean that women arent thinking the same damn thing about sex issues as well (which they are).

.
[This message was edited Tue Jan 14 0:00:39 PST 2003 by AnotherLover2]

AnotherLover2 said:

Ok Im stooping low but you can call my mariage loveless and just about sex etc. This is some hypocritcal shit going on here with you..I used the situation to make a concise and clear point which was on point and I used that example because you wrote about it publicly which means some semblance of being out there for advice, debate etc even if it was a ways back. Im ready to take the task for anything I write and I have written a LOT of personal things publicly. I was NOT using the example to hurt you but to show you exactly the point I was making with an experience that mirrors exactly what I mean that you'd finally understand.
[This message was edited Mon Jan 13 22:11:58 PST 2003 by rdhull]

AnotherLover2 said:

Well thats most unfortunate



No you were enjoying trying to roast me for my thoughts etc

I dont think you two should be enemies. This thread has been a good read, it's just gone off track.

I think that the argument has been de-railed and will only lead to things getting worse.

Just let things cool down and you two will sort it out i'm sure.

Sorry if I'm being a Buttinski.

Hey before you two go to war(i love ya both and hope you don't). You BOTH make valid points, and strangly enough you BOTH are correct. RDhull is giving what goes on in the head of most men and is being very honest with you(something a few orgers would not do). He's not trying to be PC just expressing a point he feels is valid. Anotherlover you express the way things SHOULD be. It should be dinner and just that. Why should a man expect sex just because he pays for dinner? If he's a man who is REALLY into the woman there is no doubt he will pay and not expect sex(though he still may hope). You BOTH are right,let's just end it here.

bkw said:

Im cool..Im not the one getting pissy and offended as a gender because someone doesnt have the same views as I do etc.

rdhull said
[This message was edited Tue Jan 14 0:02:01 PST 2003 by AnotherLover2]

she called my wife "steady pussy"...

Alright.

Not that what I say means a darned thing. But...it seems both slung mud - and this discussion led to hurtful words. Perhaps now is the time to cool off.

A thread about who pays for what certainly is in the eye of the one with the cash.

It's all good, you two. I commend both for taking the time to debate with such honesty. The defending part is what caused this.

Put it behind...ok? Please?

I really gotta go to bed now

Group

rdhull said:

[This message was edited Tue Jan 14 0:02:50 PST 2003 by AnotherLover2]

4LOVE said:

[This message was edited Tue Jan 14 0:03:14 PST 2003 by AnotherLover2]