I finally emailed this guy last night and asked for half my money back. I told him when I get the check I'll consider the relationship dissolved "in good faith". Now the question is, if he doesn't refund some of his fees, should I bad-mouth him on the internet? He found me through a list-serv that reaches about 1000 people in our field. I don't want to create karma and be associated with negativity, maybe that would be too much?

heartbeatocean said:

ALl you'd be doing is telling the truth. As long as you are honest with your criticism, I don't think you should feel badly about anything.

CarrieMpls said:

Co-sign, especially if the list-serv has a feedback function.

heartbeatocean said:

What else did you say? And did he answer already?

Tremolina said:

This was my short and sweet email: (no response yet, be lucky if I get one)

Dear...

It appears you have elected yourself off my project (which I perceive from a lack of communication and follow-up). I have tried to be patient and flexible but I feel less than a commitment on your end. I will be seeking someone else to work with. Since I feel you have not met our initial agreement, I am asking you to return $150 of the monies I paid in advance. It can be sent to

(my address)

Upon receiving a check, I will consider the relationship dissolved in good faith.

Thanks

heartbeatocean said:

Hey! What's wrong with an English accent

heartbeatocean said:

Very cool

But ahh $ 150... Hardly the fee most attorneys would work an hour for. And hardly a case of interest for a busy court to consider either, to be fair.

And not a big chance you will get an answer from him, let alone any admission.

If he does tho' and you still want to make him sweat, legally, so to speak, you could send it to a collection agency and see if they care to take over.

As for shaming him on the internet, I wouldn't go that far for something worth so little. Better to learn from your own mistakes and do it right next time.

-
[Edited 1/4/10 12:30pm]

Nicer email than what I would have written. But then again, I have the tendency to tell little stories in my e mails. If he doesn't respond back, lemme know.

I'll call my internet goons to take care of it.

and we don't play fair, honey. We use shoes.

MacDaddy said:

Nothing wrong with it. She asked if he was hot and it's one of the few details I know about him. Accents are always fun.

Tremolina said:

I paid $300 up front so I'm asking for him to give me half back. I realize I probably will never hear from him again, but an agreement is an agreement. It's not me to question whether he undercharged or whatever, he made an agreement with me and flaked on it. If he wants to clear himself, he can give me half back for not finishing the job and wasting my time (not to mention the hosting fees I've been paying for months with no website to show). He can pay half and the deal is cleared, no hard feelings. If he wants to be irresponsible, then that's his choice. But every choice has repercussions, subtle or obvious. That's the law of karma, and I personally like to keep my karma as squeaky clean as possible. I know where I stand, and I'm giving him the opportunity to make peace.

heartbeatocean said:

My husband is a Virgo too, and I'm a super flaky Libra, but even I'd fire me if I was like that.

minneapolisgenius said:

I have a hard time getting through life. I have super high expectations for everything, so often feel let down. That's why I'm extra nice to flakey people, because I have to compensate for being extra critical which can get me into trouble. Or so it seems.

just learn from this...your first loss is your best loss.
1) Do not pay in full in advance anymore
2) I'm not so sure about bad mouthing him on a listserve...it may be considered
libel, or defamation despite his not honouring your contract.

Learn and move on...

heartbeatocean said:

I'm very, very similar.

But he's playing you. Feel free to share your experience with the listserv. It's the truth.

BlackAdder7 said:

if all she does is describe what happened is that still defamation?

like "I had a bad experience with such and such, paid my money and got nothing in return" etc

ZombieKitten said:

1) I didn't pay full in advance. It was a partial payment.
2) I've seen others openly state their opinions about certain groups etc. on the list-serv. That's kind of the point of it, to help out others (all women) in the field. There's also places like yelp where you can give people/places a bad review. I've known people who, after receiving negative reviews on the web, made amends and cleaned up their act.

heartbeatocean said:

Karma will find him, don't worry about it, but it's not you who decides when or how it comes.

heartbeatocean said:

If he doesn't reply and pay back ask him if he wants you to 'review' him on that list serv. If you do that, be factual and do not unnecessarily bad mouth him or otherwise set yourself up for more trouble.

He could go on there too tho' and claim it's all bullshit. So I would just learn and move on.