I just checked my email, and my friend in ATL sent me an email named "Madea's Thanksgiving Rules". I opened it, and it was the same list I just read on here!

Where did you guys find this?!

chocolate1 said:

I've been getting this for years, I posted it last year.

thekidsgirl said:

Lawd! How much your mama charge for halftime entertainment?

SCNDLS said:

I knew this was a repeat! I thought I was buggin'

SCNDLS said:

she gave out special group discounts

Fury said:

Yo plate will be waitin' for you at the curb, wrapped in foil and in a Wal-mart bag.

SCNDLS said:

I know you wouldn't make ME wait at the curb!

uPtoWnNY said:

Of course not, Big Daddy.

Your plate is on the front porch between the potted plant and the ceramic frog on a lily pad.

SCNDLS said:

Just for that, no diamond ring in your Christmas stocking!

KatSkrizzle said:

Really??? I'll have to find this

SCNDLS said:

I agree with the rest and SCNDLS can I add one?

DON'T BRING MUTHAFUCKAS WHO I DON'T KNOW AND WHO I DID NOT INVITE! They have a family, let them have dinner with them!

noimageatall said:

I don't like Grey Goose so I always AKS for Ketel One, but why a cheap mofo ALWAYS ends up bringing Absoulut.

Didn't you AKS me what I'd like for you to bring and I said "Ketel muthafuckin' One"???

SCNDLS said:

That's why I said "at least" bring the Grey Goose. I hate it too. But they can then drink they own damned cheap liquor and leave mine alone.

bboy87 said:

Can't believe I missed your embedded comments.

Speaking of macaroni and cheese, I have another damn rule:

Don't be altering any of the dishes I've prepared to suit your damn taste. I cooked it so I put the ingredients in I wanted. If you go near ANY of my pots or pans, you drawing back a nub. And you know you gon' have a long ass wait in the ER on Thanksgiving so think twice before you step to my food.

This one's inspired by my uncle's wife who came to my Thanksgiving dinner 3 years ago. I prepared two pans of the most beautiful, 5 cheese macaroni and cheese casseroles you ever did see. You know, with that pretty, golden cheese crust on top. I use the recipe from Auntie Patti's book and I must say I puts my foot in it every time. I have many requests for my muhfuggin' mac and cheese.

Anyway, we're setting up all the dishes on the various kitchen counters for the line, cuz you know with 80 kneegrows we had people stationed dishing out the food, no fixin' your own plate. My uncle's wife looks at my casseroles and decides they don't look moist enough so she takes a spoon, chops them all up to hell, and pours a half cup of milk over each one before I realize what she's doing. There's milk literally pooling at the bottom of the pan.



She RUINS both of my perfect casseroles right before we start serving the food. Lawd, I had to pray that day cuz I swear fo' God, I wanted to cuss her ass the hell out then punch her in the throat. Since her daughter was there I'm sure we woulda ended up rolling around on the ground.

I recently mentioned this to MY aunt and she told me my uncle's wife did the same thing to her a few years ago.
[Edited 11/25/09 18:32pm]

SCNDLS said:

OH HEEEEELLLLL NAWL!!

You did better than me because I wouldn't have thought twice about cussing her out and I don't even get down like that. NO MA'AM

meow85 said:

That's what the benadryl's for!

PurpleRighteous1 said:

I couldn't believe she did that shit. My aunt told me she's one of those people who thinks she can burn but really can't. So she feels the need to "improve" everyone else's food.

I was SOOOO outdone.

chocolate1 said:

I've been getting this for years, I posted it last year.

SCNDLS said:

I don't even know how someone could even get it in their heads to go and touch somebody's dish like that....Hold up. Where'd she get the milk from? I know she didn't go in your refridgerator and poor YOUR milk all over your mac and cheese?!

I would love to come to SCNDLS' house for Thanksgiving. I'll bring the cheesecake. Homemade, not from The Cheesecake Factory (even though their cheesecakes are yummy!)

psychodelicide said:

Oooooh, cheesecake!!! You are sho nuf added to the list.

SCNDLS said:

Thank you!

psychodelicide said:

Now, you know you always got the password: cheesecake

bboy87 said:

Can't believe I missed your embedded comments.

Speaking of macaroni and cheese, I have another damn rule:

Don't be altering any of the dishes I've prepared to suit your damn taste. I cooked it so I put the ingredients in I wanted. If you go near ANY of my pots or pans, you drawing back a nub. And you know you gon' have a long ass wait in the ER on Thanksgiving so think twice before you step to my food.

This one's inspired by my uncle's wife who came to my Thanksgiving dinner 3 years ago. I prepared two pans of the most beautiful, 5 cheese macaroni and cheese casseroles you ever did see. You know, with that pretty, golden cheese crust on top. I use the recipe from Auntie Patti's book and I must say I puts my foot in it every time. I have many requests for my muhfuggin' mac and cheese.

Anyway, we're setting up all the dishes on the various kitchen counters for the line, cuz you know with 80 kneegrows we had people stationed dishing out the food, no fixin' your own plate. My uncle's wife looks at my casseroles and decides they don't look moist enough so she takes a spoon, chops them all up to hell, and pours a half cup of milk over each one before I realize what she's doing. There's milk literally pooling at the bottom of the pan.



She RUINS both of my perfect casseroles right before we start serving the food. Lawd, I had to pray that day cuz I swear fo' God, I wanted to cuss her ass the hell out then punch her in the throat. Since her daughter was there I'm sure we woulda ended up rolling around on the ground.

I recently mentioned this to MY aunt and she told me my uncle's wife did the same thing to her a few years ago.
[Edited 11/25/09 18:32pm]

SCNDLS said:

oh damn

DanceWme said:

My stuff went from



to

SCNDLS said:

yuck

PurpleRighteous1 said:

Which one? Dang I got get a new pic.
[Edited 11/25/09 20:04pm]