I was informed today that one of my work buddies had taken his own life yesterday. Everyone that knew him is feeling the tragedy and mostly still in shock because he was the last person anyone would have thought to go out that way. He was confident, funny, smart, had many friends, was a pin up guy and always had luck with the women.

I spoke to him a few days ago and he seemed unusually distant but I thought nothing of it because I knew he was still dealing with his fiance breaking off the engagement a few weeks ago. His death wasn't accidental, he took the time to write notes to his family and tie a noose to the ceiling and hang himself. I suppose nobody will ever know the personal reasons for his suicide but what I know is that peeps usually don't want to die, but what they do want is for the pain to stop and this seems like the only passage left. A weak decision yes, but on the other hand it would take so much strength to actually see it through to the end.

I've known peeps that have taken their own lives but that was mostly in high school, not these days. It always leaves that one question...with all the other options in life available to help....why?

Is there anyone here that would like to share an opinion or similiar event that they have dealt with?

Is there anyone here that would like to share an opinion or similiar event that they have dealt with?[/quote]


I've wanted to simply because u think u have no way out. The specific reason of why? sometimes there isn't any.

PanthaGirl said:

well this would be a giant red flag, would it not?

whistle said:

a friend of mine is slowly (but surely we suspect) drinking himself to death after his divorce papers came through

whistle said:

Well not necessarily because he was engaged to my best friend at work last year and even though that ended badly, they both managed to move on to new peeps and directions in their lives. If u knew him it just couldn't be picked because he seemingly had a thick skin of resistance. I knew he was depressed lately, but definately not suicidal...

missmad said

I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish u well....

PanthaGirl said:

most people have a lot of secrets.

ZombieKitten said:

Wow okay I'm sorry to hear that, has anyone tried to have an intervention or just talk to him about it?

whistle said:

Yah true that, some do some don't.

PanthaGirl said:

men especially. we don't really share our innermost feelings with anyone. it's not a blokey thing to do.

I have no answers really. Many ppl do it for many reasons but I think it usually comes down to feeling like there is no other way to stop the pain.

Sorry to hear about this. My condolences to his family and friends.

whistle said:

Wow okay. Wonder why though? I've known men to open up to me but of course I know there are sometimes demons left inside to roam.

PanthaGirl said:[quote]

whistle said:

it's perceived as showing weakness, not something we're keen on.

PanthaGirl said:

yup, he'll change for a short time, but eventually always goes back to his habits

MrsMdiver said:

Thanks hon' I appreciate that and ur words lovely ...

whistle said:

I wish it was different.

ZombieKitten said:

Okay I understand mate and hear yah. It's so sad cause he is in dire straits, peeps are aware of it and he does need serious help. One of my uncles was a mess after his wife took the kids, the porche, the furniture and left him, he was on suicide watch for awhile but has since remarried and started over.

PanthaGirl said:

this happened to him in 1996 I think he still hasn't met someone else or made a fresh start

PanthaGirl said:

ZombieKitten said:

Wooww that's a long time mate, so he's sitting back watching the cars go past and drinking himself into oblivion all these years it seems he can't or won't break his fatal habits. Brutal and sad.

PanthaGirl said:

and he's only 40

ZombieKitten said:

Still so young too....

I am sorry for the loss of your friend, Christine.

Deepest Sympathy ...

we will never understand why people choose to end their lives

I have lost many this way

Love to his loved ones and family

Vendetta1 said:

Thank u V ...

Mach said:

Thanks Mach I appreciate it. His parents are a mess right now and my friend that was engaged to him blames herself. It's so hard on all ends.

that is so sad definitely you have my condolences!

I know I suffer from sevee depression, and unfortunately I have had days where I would rather be dead than to have to deal with any more bullshit in this world. Sometimes, even with talking it through with friends, and trying to make life better, it just feels like some everlasting misery, So unfortunately I can understand why, but I also know I could not do that to my family and friends, especially after losing my mom and my sister (natural causes). I know it would hurt them deeply.

When my sister passed I could not stop thinking how a person who loved people and loved life was gone and here I still was, feeling like the worse person on earth....

Sometimes your mind just is too insistent on dwelling on negative, and it takes a lot of work to see the positives. I fight every day to say that I am better than how I feel. So your friend probably had some serious demons inside of him that. But I wish he would have chosen any other option.

BklynBabe said:

I have felt like you on too many occassions.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I've had a few friends who've chosen to end their lives. It's often the ones you don't expect and, naturally, you would have done whatever you could to prevent it.

Sometimes, the weight of life is unbearable to folks in a way their demeanor just doesn't allow you to see. If anything, your coworker's case seems to add weight to the theory that there's no stopping someone who's decided to do it.

Which stinks, because life invariably gets better.

People kill themselves because they see no way out of their problems...like someone who loses a job. They have a family and they are already struggling...like the man that killed his whole family or the guy that gunned down people at his former job. I can see why people kill themselves.