i left at 17 for college in 1986, came back for 6 months after graduation in 1991 and never looked back until last year when my mom passed away. i'm 41 and while i'm not exactly thrilled to be sharing a house with my sister and kids, i must admit i did not feel the recession sting that a lot of people did.
pushing your kids out in an economy like this is cruel if they can't afford it.

Vendetta1 said:

And I agree about the adult development/personal responsibility. All of my friends who lived at home as adults still rely on their parents financially in some way or do not hesitate to ask them for money when they get in a bind. I've never borrowed money from someone else cuz I don't even think of it as an option because I've had to do it myself for so long.
[Edited 10/30/09 8:01am]

PanthaGirl said:

SCNDLS said:

The whole time I was home, I never asked for money- for school, for my car, for ANYTHING. I'd go without before I did that. In fact, even if they'd offer, I'd turn them down.
I did, however, contribute to the bills and buy my own groceries/cook my own meals. I considered that part of my budget and didn't waver even when I was running short. It was only right. I was not their dependent, I was just living there.

PanthaGirl said:

All my children are entitled to is 18 years. I was on my own at 15 and I have told my children they are on their own at 18. I have told them this. I have taught them the skills they need to be productive adults. It's on them if they choose to do anything with the knowledge I imparted on them.

I will be damned if I am going to foot all the bills and be their maid, too. The two at home are not contributing, money or otherwise and if they don't get their shit together, once they leave my home, we will not be speaking to each other.

How you gather anyone is forgetting their kids because they want them to stand on their own two feet is beyond me. I will not be my grandmother with 56 and 60 year old kids living with me.

Vendetta1 said:

IMO if ur living at home it does not mean sponging off parents or siblings, it means being independant, paying own bills, contributing to household bills and doing own share of housework etc whilst maintaining ur own job and life. There are many reasons someone may remain at home and I could never have the audacity to treat my own children with one option 'ur out at 18' it doesn't sit well with me. Living at home does not break down ones independance but can actually further develop it especially financially. To each their own.

PanthaGirl said:

Exactly which is why I don't see why you have a problem with how I run MY household. I am very much looking forward to 3 1/2 years from now when I am no longer responsible for anyone else but myself. Selfish? No. I have provided for them all their ungrateful lives.

I do want to live in a place where other adults have keys to my house or where I can't walk around naked if I choose to.

Well I told mine 18 is the cutoff so he won't be surprised when he gets the boot lol

I've already got him saying things like "I'm going to college", "I'm getting a job". etc. If you don't raise your kids to be responsible addults, who will. If I drop dead the day after he's 18, I will have the peace of mind that at least I showed him how to take care of himself and not have to be dependent on anyone. After that if he chooses to act like a dependent, it won't be me That's what lil gullible females are for. He will also know how to cook, do his laundry, and wash his drawers. LOL if he has some female cooking for him and such like he don't know....it wasn't because I raised him up to be helpless

*thinks of my brother sitting home all day, drinking beer, smoking, with no job, stealing from his momma*

BklynBabe said:

I agree with all of this. My grandmother and my mother took care of grown ass men for most of their adult lives. It's not happening on my watch.

You're too old when your parents want you out...and that could mean 18 or it could mean 40. It's whatever the family is comfortable with and there is nothing more to it.

JustErin said:

Thank you Erin. That's what I should have said.

godyssey said:

I grew up with Reaganomics! It was difficult then.

but at least contribute some rent and some food...otherwise for damn sure you gotta go!

If I could tolerate that I'd probably have me a husband by now LOL