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PrintableIceNine said: AnotherLover2 said: But if ya wanna go back and get serious about it, then yes, of course, there's a double standard. Women are still looked to as the person to set the sexual boundaries, to be the one to say no, while the (straight) male is programmed to get as far as he can with as many women as he can. Women are also still rewarded for being "sweet" and "nice" in other aspects of life as well, while cursed as a "ballbreaker" and "bitch" if she's aggressive and competitive and not-nice.
I think the old saying about what men want: "a lady in the drawing room, a whore in bed" tells it exactly the way it still often is, really. PRECISELY! If a woman popped up on here and said "I have fucked 285 guys" almost everyone would think that she was a giant whore... it is accepted when guys say it. I just went about making a point in a different way... it is much more provocative when done in an indirect way. Yeah, people on this site might accept it, but most people aren't hip to the idea of some guy fucking 285 other guys. You know. | |
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tommyalma said: IceNine said: AnotherLover2 said: But if ya wanna go back and get serious about it, then yes, of course, there's a double standard. Women are still looked to as the person to set the sexual boundaries, to be the one to say no, while the (straight) male is programmed to get as far as he can with as many women as he can. Women are also still rewarded for being "sweet" and "nice" in other aspects of life as well, while cursed as a "ballbreaker" and "bitch" if she's aggressive and competitive and not-nice.
I think the old saying about what men want: "a lady in the drawing room, a whore in bed" tells it exactly the way it still often is, really. PRECISELY! If a woman popped up on here and said "I have fucked 285 guys" almost everyone would think that she was a giant whore... it is accepted when guys say it. I just went about making a point in a different way... it is much more provocative when done in an indirect way. Yeah, people on this site might accept it, but most people aren't hip to the idea of some guy fucking 285 other guys. You know. :LOL: Classic! What I had meant to say was: "...it is accepted when men say that they have fucked 285 WOMEN." SUPERJOINT RITUAL - http://www.superjointritual.com
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IceNine said: LaVisHh said: IceNine said: Wet-dreams and hard-ons come from basic biological processes and hormonal development and are largely confined to adolescence. Nocturnal emissions are relatively rare outside of early sexual development and wet dreams in adults are nothing more than a mental expression of internal desires. Wet dreams have nothing to do with monogamy, nor do adolescent developmental processes.
The only point I am trying to make is it is intended, to me, that men are sexually able to reproduce, early and often. Nature brings this into their world without asking for it. It comes, so to speak. It fills a man's mind with sexual thoughts and desires. All meant to keep humans reproducing. I guess I am going to quit debating this issue, as we clearly disagree.  Since humans are animals, I would not argue that people were not meant to reproduce as animals. What I am arguing, however is that humans are far more complex social beings then animals and we NEED a solid structure in which to raise children, therefore monogamy is actually a characteristic that will lead to the betterment of humankind. Ice, you are assuming that a solid family capable of raising children well can only include two adults. Non-monogamy does not have to mean fucking as many people as possible, or not being loyal to your family. In my case, I would like an expanded family of adults --3 or 4 maybe-- who are loyal to each other, each a spouse to every other. As it turns out, people who feel this way are so rare that I'm actually living in a traditional 1 man/1 woman marriage, but I don't consider it necessarily ideal. I don't see that this makes me unable to participate in the betterment of mankind with my family. Doves, Mel!ssa | |
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tackam said: IceNine said: LaVisHh said: IceNine said: Wet-dreams and hard-ons come from basic biological processes and hormonal development and are largely confined to adolescence. Nocturnal emissions are relatively rare outside of early sexual development and wet dreams in adults are nothing more than a mental expression of internal desires. Wet dreams have nothing to do with monogamy, nor do adolescent developmental processes.
The only point I am trying to make is it is intended, to me, that men are sexually able to reproduce, early and often. Nature brings this into their world without asking for it. It comes, so to speak. It fills a man's mind with sexual thoughts and desires. All meant to keep humans reproducing. I guess I am going to quit debating this issue, as we clearly disagree. Since humans are animals, I would not argue that people were not meant to reproduce as animals. What I am arguing, however is that humans are far more complex social beings then animals and we NEED a solid structure in which to raise children, therefore monogamy is actually a characteristic that will lead to the betterment of humankind. Ice, you are assuming that a solid family capable of raising children well can only include two adults. Non-monogamy does not have to mean fucking as many people as possible, or not being loyal to your family. In my case, I would like an expanded family of adults --3 or 4 maybe-- who are loyal to each other, each a spouse to every other. As it turns out, people who feel this way are so rare that I'm actually living in a traditional 1 man/1 woman marriage, but I don't consider it necessarily ideal. I don't see that this makes me unable to participate in the betterment of mankind with my family. Doves, Mel!ssa I don't disagree, as long as the kids have a solid foundation and is not left to discover life's mysteries on their own. My problem is not with polygamy so much as it is with the idea of men running around impregnating women and not being a part of the child's life. SUPERJOINT RITUAL - http://www.superjointritual.com
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IceNine said: Do guys who claim to have had sexual intercourse with lots of women turn you on... or do you think that they are really scared little boys who desperately want people to think that they are verile and attractive? Or... do you think that there is something else going on?
What about guys who constantly claim that they are the hottest thing going? What do you think there? I don't care. Is there any place of refuge one can flee from this insanity | |
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It turns me off because  can't help but to think
that the guy is easy & cheap. | |
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i don't care how many women he's been with, as long as he's responsible about his sexual hygiene
if he's clean and cares enough to keep me clean as well when we become lovers, then whatever of course, guys who BRAG about the quantity of their encounters make me wonder whether the quality of their technique is that great since, if they were good, the women would want to come back for seconds and apparently aren't since he's gotta find another my 2c [This message was edited Wed Jan 8 11:15:26 PST 2003 by XxAxX] | |
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listen a man can be a hoe just like a woman can be a hoe and just because a man sleept with a number of women, doesn't nesscarily make him a gigglo or player ... If a man claim 2 have slept with alot of women ... I probably wouldn't believe him anways, so i guess my answer would be no. I would just see him as a man who's afraid of 2 deal with real emotions such as love. [This message was edited Wed Jan 8 11:18:06 PST 2003 by DigitalLisa] | |
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DigitalLisa said: I would just see him as a man who's afraid of 2 deal with real emotions such as love.
That is a DAMNED fine point! SUPERJOINT RITUAL - http://www.superjointritual.com
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IceNine said: Paisley said: It doesn't bother me, eye figure what happened in their past is none of my business.
That is not my point... my point is: What do you think about men bragging about fucking a lot of women, as if that is some kind of badge of honor? Do you think that this is a sign of insecurity or security... or something else? I think it's bullshit and a sign of insecurity. Our society dictates that the more women a man sleeps with the more of a 'valid' man he is...but, anyone with half a brain knows that it's a load of crap. | |
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IceNine said: DigitalLisa said: I would just see him as a man who's afraid of 2 deal with real emotions such as love.
That is a DAMNED fine point! shiiit I AIN'T SCARED!!! i been goin TOE TO TOE with love ALL MY LIFE...  I AM King BAD a.k.a. BAD,
YOU EITHER WANNA BE ME, OR BE JUST LIKE ME  ™ | |
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definatly not...scarres me a little actually
i get more turned on by guys that say they haven't been with many women...it makes me feel like a naughty bad girl for seducing them 
 you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. | |
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It should be about quality not quantity. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. | |
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IceNine said: Do guys who claim to have had sexual intercourse with lots of women turn you on... or do you think that they are really scared little boys who desperately want people to think that they are verile and attractive? Or... do you think that there is something else going on?
Depending on how many is "lots of women" they're every bit the slut as their female counterparts who are always deemed sluts. What about guys who constantly claim that they are the hottest thing going? What do you think there?
Turn-off. This post not for the wimp contingent. All whiny wusses avert your eyes. | |
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Conceit of any kind is a turn off IMO, but that's just me. If a man brags about numerous sexual partners, he's doing it proudly & smugly, as if finding a bunch of dumb broads is a feat.  
And if they think they're the hottest thing out on top of that?? :O  I'm running away... :::DUST CLOUD:::  I never met you, but I LOVE you & I will forever!! Thank you for being YOU - my little Princey, the best to EVER do it | |
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IceNine said: Paisley said: It doesn't bother me, eye figure what happened in their past is none of my business.
That is not my point... my point is: What do you think about men bragging about fucking a lot of women, as if that is some kind of badge of honor? Do you think that this is a sign of insecurity or security... or something else? SMART men who want to continue to FUCK many women never brag... | |
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Personally, I don't wanna hear about the man's Conquests. I want the man to show me with Actions and Technique just how Skillful he is and Bragging isn't doing anything but flapping your Gums. I want a Lover not a Talker. Show me Baby what you Got in Your pants and work it as Missy says or else go Home and talk to Yo Self and Your Hand! And Furthermore...I hate those Stupid RULES of Sexual Ediquette on how Many Dates UNTIL>>> That just is so Lame and after waiting 3 months you better just stay Friends cause it Ain't Happening... I once waited 7 years before me and a Potential could get it on well tell you sumething after that he got Old and Changed and I lost my Fire for him and he was just Too Damn Slow Making his Move...I Hate Overly Forceful Men or Slow Ones. Basically,if we are dating and all and we click well I don't believe in that Waiting Game. That's Bullshit and I jumped on my ex after 3 years of Sexual tension and he told me I love you and it was Sex all the time for Years. So if you have the Hots for somebody and all why wait? Tommorrow may Never come and you May Drop Dead Overnight. Take advantage Of these Years of Youth and have Fun! If you are Saving it Girls well remember sometimes a first time isn't always forever and sometimes Disappointing as all Hell. As Prince says when 2 R In Love or I'd say even Lust Get Busy!!! | |
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DORA said: IceNine said: Paisley said: It doesn't bother me, eye figure what happened in their past is none of my business.
That is not my point... my point is: What do you think about men bragging about fucking a lot of women, as if that is some kind of badge of honor? Do you think that this is a sign of insecurity or security... or something else? SMART men who want to continue to FUCK many women never brag... I am a FOOL for you.Come...closer | |
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The guy also better be prepared to take an Aids test if he is such a Playboy and well I definitely wanna see his Pleasure Toy. Be prepared for Inspection and All for Size Quotiant and Cleanliness and All Cause Damn I wanna See What will be going Inside me and you Know that Man- Meat better be Kosher or else it's Thumbs Down and you better Talk to your Hand... Also No Hair which is Dirty! | |
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Natasha said: The guy also better be prepared to take an Aids test if he is such a Playboy and well I definitely wanna see his Pleasure Toy. Be prepared for Inspection and All for Size Quotiant and Cleanliness and All Cause Damn I wanna See What will be going Inside me and you Know that Man- Meat better be Kosher or else it's Thumbs Down and you better Talk to your Hand... Also No Hair which is Dirty!
YOU,i will not bite. | |
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I truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in the sense that they only have one partner their entire lives. My grandparents are proof that this can happen. They fell in love and never parted... and never cheated... until my grandfather passed away.
I also truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in a relationship... be that a marriage or boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone will have urges from time to time. It is up to the individual whether or not they will follow through with them. If someone truly loves and cares for another, they will respect that person and remain faithful to him/her, no matter how strong their desires may be. I think a lot of this has to do with the times we are in today. Back when my grandparents were young and in love women did not flaunt themselves in front of men who are in a relationship as readily as some women do today . It is all too common today that people do not respect relationships. To me, that is a total lack of respect on the other woman's part and it really shows that she has little respect for herself. Men do this too, flirt with women who are in a relationship, but I think women are less likely to follow through with their urges because women tend to commit more to the heart. Just my two cents. | |
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AzureStar said: I truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in the sense that they only have one partner their entire lives. My grandparents are proof that this can happen. They fell in love and never parted... and never cheated... until my grandfather passed away.
I also truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in a relationship... be that a marriage or boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone will have urges from time to time. It is up to the individual whether or not they will follow through with them. If someone truly loves and cares for another, they will respect that person and remain faithful to him/her, no matter how strong their desires may be. I think a lot of this has to do with the times we are in today. Back when my grandparents were young and in love women did not flaunt themselves in front of men who are in a relationship as readily as some women do today . It is all too common today that people do not respect relationships. To me, that is a total lack of respect on the other woman's part and it really shows that she has little respect for herself. Men do this too, flirt with women who are in a relationship, but I think women are less likely to follow through with their urges because women tend to commit more to the heart. Just my two cents. I agree, and I think society romanticizes having affairs--always portraying the cheater as being treated unfairly by their partner, as if being "driven" to cheat--via the movies, soap operas, etc. They don't show the real aftermath of a broken family, with heartbroken children. But I do believe that even if a single woman "flaunts" herself, it is still ultimately the married man the wife needs to blame if he strays, since he's the one she has the commitment with...the "other woman" most likely has low self-esteem and is trying to prove her attractiveness by going after something she's not supposed to have. And she is, of course, betraying her "sister" and placing male approval and desire before female friendship and respect | |
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IceNine said: LaVisHh said: IceNine said: True in a sense... AND, humans are animals. There are animals that are monogamous and humans just might be one of those animals that were meant to be monogamous.
Ah, but those in the animal kingdom that are monogamous ARE. The majority of humans are NOT. Who here claims to only have had one partner, ever?  I would argue that monogamy is a characteristic of humanity and that human weakness in the face of temptation is the culprit. Our evolved brain and the nature of our mental processes allows us to "choose" to ignore nature. Indeed, mankind has a long history of subverting nature through various methods, therefore it would not be surprising at all if humans have subverted the natural tendency toward monogamy. Then why are there so many more women than men? Shouldn't there be more of a balance for this monogamy to work? I haven't seen anything that makes me think monogamy is any more natural than multiple partners. And you don't have to be married to be monogamous. And Money is the excuse for divorce. Most marriages end from cheating than financial woes. Love can survive poverty, it can't survive cheating. | |
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Men just b.s. about it. No it is not a turn on. Men sometimes brag about how many they have humped. Then you know it is all lies. 
Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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moderatorluv4u said: Men just b.s. about it. No it is not a turn on. Men sometimes brag about how many they have humped. Then you know it is all lies.
Tru Dat | |
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I once dated this guy who couldn't stop talking about his old girlfriend and how she done him wrong. He even had us walk past her house. It was all the time. I couldn't stand it and quickly said Goodbye since he was Obviously still in Love with her. Quite annoying to be on a date while he talked about his ex and her wrongs. I felt like he should call her back up for a date. | |
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AnotherLover2 said: AzureStar said: I truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in the sense that they only have one partner their entire lives. My grandparents are proof that this can happen. They fell in love and never parted... and never cheated... until my grandfather passed away.
I also truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in a relationship... be that a marriage or boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone will have urges from time to time. It is up to the individual whether or not they will follow through with them. If someone truly loves and cares for another, they will respect that person and remain faithful to him/her, no matter how strong their desires may be. I think a lot of this has to do with the times we are in today. Back when my grandparents were young and in love women did not flaunt themselves in front of men who are in a relationship as readily as some women do today . It is all too common today that people do not respect relationships. To me, that is a total lack of respect on the other woman's part and it really shows that she has little respect for herself. Men do this too, flirt with women who are in a relationship, but I think women are less likely to follow through with their urges because women tend to commit more to the heart. Just my two cents. I agree, and I think society romanticizes having affairs--always portraying the cheater as being treated unfairly by their partner, as if being "driven" to cheat--via the movies, soap operas, etc. They don't show the real aftermath of a broken family, with heartbroken children. But I do believe that even if a single woman "flaunts" herself, it is still ultimately the married man the wife needs to blame if he strays, since he's the one she has the commitment with...the "other woman" most likely has low self-esteem and is trying to prove her attractiveness by going after something she's not supposed to have. And she is, of course, betraying her "sister" and placing male approval and desire before female friendship and respect I certainly agree with you... it is ultimately the man who is to blame if he strays. The media certainly doesn't help matters any at all, you're right. In cases of being "driven" to cheat, the man/woman who did so should have been mature enough to end the relationship prior to venturing out.  In my opinion, no one can drive another to cheat. There is no excuse for cheating. Period. | |
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AzureStar said: AnotherLover2 said: AzureStar said: I truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in the sense that they only have one partner their entire lives. My grandparents are proof that this can happen. They fell in love and never parted... and never cheated... until my grandfather passed away.
I also truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in a relationship... be that a marriage or boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone will have urges from time to time. It is up to the individual whether or not they will follow through with them. If someone truly loves and cares for another, they will respect that person and remain faithful to him/her, no matter how strong their desires may be. I think a lot of this has to do with the times we are in today. Back when my grandparents were young and in love women did not flaunt themselves in front of men who are in a relationship as readily as some women do today . It is all too common today that people do not respect relationships. To me, that is a total lack of respect on the other woman's part and it really shows that she has little respect for herself. Men do this too, flirt with women who are in a relationship, but I think women are less likely to follow through with their urges because women tend to commit more to the heart. Just my two cents. I agree, and I think society romanticizes having affairs--always portraying the cheater as being treated unfairly by their partner, as if being "driven" to cheat--via the movies, soap operas, etc. They don't show the real aftermath of a broken family, with heartbroken children. But I do believe that even if a single woman "flaunts" herself, it is still ultimately the married man the wife needs to blame if he strays, since he's the one she has the commitment with...the "other woman" most likely has low self-esteem and is trying to prove her attractiveness by going after something she's not supposed to have. And she is, of course, betraying her "sister" and placing male approval and desire before female friendship and respect I certainly agree with you... it is ultimately the man who is to blame if he strays. The media certainly doesn't help matters any at all, you're right. In cases of being "driven" to cheat, the man/woman who did so should have been mature enough to end the relationship prior to venturing out. In my opinion, no one can drive another to cheat. There is no excuse for cheating. Period.High-Five, Heather/Feather! | |
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An ex boyfriend of mine used to converse with 2 what he told me ex-girlfriends and an ex-wife who would periodically Drop by the House. Me being 18 and him 33 what did I know ... But he did buy me a Diamond Ring so I guess I was the One. | |
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AzureStar said: AnotherLover2 said: AzureStar said: I truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in the sense that they only have one partner their entire lives. My grandparents are proof that this can happen. They fell in love and never parted... and never cheated... until my grandfather passed away.
I also truly believe that men and women both can be monogomous in a relationship... be that a marriage or boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone will have urges from time to time. It is up to the individual whether or not they will follow through with them. If someone truly loves and cares for another, they will respect that person and remain faithful to him/her, no matter how strong their desires may be. I think a lot of this has to do with the times we are in today. Back when my grandparents were young and in love women did not flaunt themselves in front of men who are in a relationship as readily as some women do today . It is all too common today that people do not respect relationships. To me, that is a total lack of respect on the other woman's part and it really shows that she has little respect for herself. Men do this too, flirt with women who are in a relationship, but I think women are less likely to follow through with their urges because women tend to commit more to the heart. Just my two cents. I agree, and I think society romanticizes having affairs--always portraying the cheater as being treated unfairly by their partner, as if being "driven" to cheat--via the movies, soap operas, etc. They don't show the real aftermath of a broken family, with heartbroken children. But I do believe that even if a single woman "flaunts" herself, it is still ultimately the married man the wife needs to blame if he strays, since he's the one she has the commitment with...the "other woman" most likely has low self-esteem and is trying to prove her attractiveness by going after something she's not supposed to have. And she is, of course, betraying her "sister" and placing male approval and desire before female friendship and respect I certainly agree with you... it is ultimately the man who is to blame if he strays. The media certainly doesn't help matters any at all, you're right. In cases of being "driven" to cheat, the man/woman who did so should have been mature enough to end the relationship prior to venturing out. In my opinion, no one can drive another to cheat. There is no excuse for cheating. Period.Agreed, You should never cheat on your partner.If you want multiple partners you need to find someone who is into that sort of thing. The biggest problem with relationships today is that people do the politically correct thing and not be true to themselves. Then they struggle through a relationship that doesn't have a chance because it's based on lies. People need to be more up front about what they want and not live lies. You only live once...BE TRUE!! | |
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