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Thread started 09/21/09 9:56pm

myfavorite

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There is a bigot in your group of friends......

you have a group of friends you hang around. they are always getting together for drinks and tea at each others house, but lately you notice a couple in the group constantly bad mouth others that aren't there???


what do you do??? ...



call them out?

ignore them??

find a different group of friends??
THE B EST BE YOURSELF AS LONG AS YOUR SELF ISNT A DYCK[/r]

**....Someti
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Reply #1 posted 09/21/09 9:57pm

Lammastide

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myfavorite said:

you have a group of friends you hang around. they are always getting together for drinks and tea at each others house, but lately you notice a couple in the group constantly bad mouth others that aren't there???


what do you do??? ...



call them out?

ignore them??

find a different group of friends??

All of the above when it's appropriate. lol
Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ
πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν
τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.”
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Reply #2 posted 09/21/09 10:02pm

johnart

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Bad mouth how? When you say Bigot... Racially?
That I wouldn't be able to tolerate or have in my presence. Not in any capacity. I can't be friends with this kind of person. So I would call them out for sure.

If they were just bad mouthing the others, I would just say I don't want any part of it. Of course now I'd wonder what they might be saying behind my back.

But sometimes two mutual friends have beef with each other and it's not my business. That's the type of situation I'm referring to. In that case I would (and have) tell them I don't want to hear it.
[Edited 9/21/09 22:05pm]
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Reply #3 posted 09/21/09 10:27pm

thekidsgirl

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I'd probably say something like,

"uh, ya'll are some skanky wenches for talking bout Johnart behind his back and then riding his balls when he comes around! I hope Jesus kicks all your asses" no no no!
If you will, so will I
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Reply #4 posted 09/21/09 10:44pm

Imago

thekidsgirl said:

I'd probably say something like,

"uh, ya'll are some skanky wenches for talking bout Johnart behind his back and then riding his balls when he comes around! I hope Jesus kicks all your asses" no no no!

What on earth are you talking about, woman?
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Reply #5 posted 09/21/09 10:58pm

thekidsgirl

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Imago said:

thekidsgirl said:

I'd probably say something like,

"uh, ya'll are some skanky wenches for talking bout Johnart behind his back and then riding his balls when he comes around! I hope Jesus kicks all your asses" no no no!

What on earth are you talking about, woman?


haters disbelief
If you will, so will I
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Reply #6 posted 09/22/09 12:06am

novabrkr

I don't have a group of friends anymore. confused
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Reply #7 posted 09/22/09 1:31am

connorhawke

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novabrkr said:

I don't have a group of friends anymore. confused


Did you eat them? eek
"...and If all of this Love Talk ends with Prince getting married to someone other than me, all I would like to do is give Prince a life size Purple Fabric Cloud Guitar that I made from a vintage bedspread that I used as a Christmas Tree Skirt." Tame, Feb
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Reply #8 posted 09/22/09 2:06am

PANDURITO

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novabrkr said:

I don't have a group of friends anymore. confused

I see hmmm YOU were the bigot nod
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Reply #9 posted 09/22/09 2:07am

PANDURITO

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This is a bigot in my mother language

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Reply #10 posted 09/22/09 3:26am

myfavorite

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ah, yes, the dreaded happy hairy wirey lipstitz. hmmm
THE B EST BE YOURSELF AS LONG AS YOUR SELF ISNT A DYCK[/r]

**....Someti
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Reply #11 posted 09/22/09 5:07am

Dayclear

Id' call them out. sometimes people don't know how bad they sound until you bring it to their attention and embarass them.
[Edited 9/22/09 5:08am]
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Reply #12 posted 09/22/09 8:05am

johnart

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thekidsgirl said:

Imago said:


What on earth are you talking about, woman?


haters disbelief


I want NAMES!!! hammer mad
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Reply #13 posted 09/22/09 9:00am

Lammastide

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Dayclear said:

Id' call them out. sometimes people don't know how bad they sound until you bring it to their attention and embarass them.
[Edited 9/22/09 5:08am]

Totally unrelated... Your avatar is awesome! nod
Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ
πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν
τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.”
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Reply #14 posted 09/22/09 9:19am

novabrkr

connorhawke said:

novabrkr said:

I don't have a group of friends anymore. confused


Did you eat them? eek


confused

PANDURITO said:

novabrkr said:

I don't have a group of friends anymore. confused

I see hmmm YOU were the bigot nod


neutral
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Reply #15 posted 09/22/09 9:26am

PANDURITO

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novabrkr said:

neutral

sad
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Reply #16 posted 09/22/09 9:36am

PANDURITO

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(No wonder he's got no friends)
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Reply #17 posted 09/22/09 9:58am

ernestsewell

myfavorite said:

you have a group of friends you hang around. they are always getting together for drinks and tea at each others house, but lately you notice a couple in the group constantly bad mouth others that aren't there???

what do you do???
call them out?
ignore them??
find a different group of friends??


Call them out on it. Defend your friends, whether they're there or not. Once you call them out, they'll either straighten up, or they'll naturally drift to another group of friends (thereby releasing you from the duty of having to search for new friends yourself.)
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Reply #18 posted 09/22/09 12:43pm

DesireeNevermi
nd

It's tricky. What if they talk about you when you're not around? Some people just trash talk...part of their personality. Plus you need to consider how bad the comments are, how long everyone has known each other and what the end result might be. shrug I'd probably go with "find new friends".
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Reply #19 posted 09/23/09 6:26am

myfavorite

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very well i should ms desiree.
THE B EST BE YOURSELF AS LONG AS YOUR SELF ISNT A DYCK[/r]

**....Someti
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