meow85 said:

I just looked at my essay of a post!...to see where I said you couldn't respond...I didn't say it!..and I value your response...whether I agree or not.
[Edited 9/2/09 10:51am]

I don't really consider a man that wants to marry a 'good' man in the first place to be honest. So if men are on a marriage strike, I say, "Perfect" because I have zero interest in being married.

And from your posts in this thread I would say that you definitely come off as jaded towards women.

JustErin said:

Each to their own...a lot of women do wish to be married though...definitely not jaded...that's just what is called an attempt at 'shaming language'...maybe you're used to being agreed with all the time?...

I might be coming across as...whatever...don't know why...apart from one post where I did a bit a name calling...slapped wrist for that...no one values women more than me...always have done...including 'Mummy' and sister...and am aware of their strengths, qualities and abilities...independent of men...I should know I teach them!

I hope it's not assumed that I'm a traditional this or that...I wouldn't put the word traditional on something that I find as natural as breathing anyway...
I'm just an average guy,writing a post who doesn't put women on a pedestal, that's all.
God knows women definitely don't put men on a pedestal either...lol!

I just think when women/feminists... blame the dreaded 'patriarchy'...that really is just a small select group of mainly white men...most men suffer...but all men are often lumped together as the enemy...a truly mistaken thought pattern...when really and truly men and women complement each other...

What I do put on a pedestal...is the relationship between a man and a woman... that I can talk about all day, because that is what I had...uh for those that are interested...

l8r folk...


.

Not sure why you're talking about putting women on pedestals. Don't think I saw anyone claim they should be either.

This is about women being looked down on for being sexually liberated and confident - like men are without even a second glance.

And all in the name of "morality".

As a woman who is confident in her sexuality, my sexual choices are not based on a lack of self esteem or respect for myself - it's exactly the opposite and men who think that there should be a difference in the way they treat women they want to be with long term versus not can take their immature, messed up and sexually repressed ideals and head for the door, as we laugh at them.

JustErin said:

Ok!...let's take out the word 'morality' I can see you don't like that!...Erin I'm not judging you I can see the lifestyle you lead sexually...fine...not everyone is like that...fine too.
Men who...how shall I say it since I don't do it and don't wanna offend...'have multiple sexual partners in a short space of time are seen as 'studs' by society but I don't think they are celebrated deep down, that's a misconception.
Look most people hook up..it seems to be the norm now, you have total confidence and high self esteem doing it..fine...you don't have to answer to me.

Going back to the subject..."Are women judged more harshly for sexual escapades"...with many different people obviously.

I could talk about the woman's genitalia and the detrimental effects of how multiple men (or women) affect the physiological health of this sensitive area, but you wouldn't be interested and it's not the subject of the thread.

The simple answer from women would be 'Yes...you go girl!"...and if you take this kind of behaviour as 'normal' each to their own...good luck...the clock is ticking though...

If women on here understand or care enough about men you'll know (if we're talking about sex) that what gives women their value is their exclusivity...not a woman who has slept with 69 men last weekend at last weekend's rave.

Any straight man in his right mind will not want that...and rightly so, perfectly normal...but...it's 2009...off you go, sexual freedom...all about your choices...I'm not judging you...good luck.

Like I say most women are more interested in other women's opinions and take have an uninterested view of men...to their detriment of course since that's half the human race...and some men are really decent and have a view of life bigger than just sex and want to help lift the spirits of women...(I can already hear folks taking that the wrong way)

So!...all the best free spirited women with unlimited choices!...once you get bored of 'vagina monologuing' it... just message me if you want to chat about these kind of issues...for those that have already, thank you for your responses..they are valued.

Erin...


peace...shockadelica
[Edited 9/2/09 12:31pm]

funkyandy said:

Judge away, doesn't bother me. I judge people all the time...but I don't think you have the slightest clue what kind of lifestyle I lead sexually.




I'm not answering to anyone. I'm just engaging in a dialogue that I happen to find interesting.



to the enth degree.



The clock is ticking towards what exactly?



This is exactly the kind of fucked up logic that I find laughable. Luckily, the men I have known and know do not think this way at all. These are the kind of men I consider to be the 'good' men.


As well, sexual confidence and liberalism doesn't automatically = promiscuity, it certainly doesn't in my case.




I only really care what men that I want to be with think about me. I couldn't care what some chick thinks about me in that way.

The men that think the same way as you are the 'good' men!...surprise surprise?

Feel free to 'laugh away at the perceived 'fucked up logic'...it's quite 'logical' to some...u just don't agree...couldn't care less either...!

Forget about the clock ticking comment..since it washed all over you...

Yes, I know nothing about your sexual behaviour, not interested either.

Some women are interested in the effect of multiple partners on female genitalia...judging by the responses I got...

Not all my comments are directed at you JustErin...most are general...

Most, no all women I know...and it's a lot... who've had multiple partners in an ongoing way have problems in the future committing to one person..and if they do it's because of security or increasing age.The love in a particular way is harder...this is not directed at anyone...talking about my peeps...

Yep...all we're doing is engaging in discussion, no more, no less.

Well, of course they are good for me. Why would I have an interest in people who I think suck.

Don't understand the washed all over comment, but whatever.

And again, you don't know shit about my sexual behaviour.



I'm not totally understanding what you're trying to say here.

No worries, whatever...I agree.
Yeah, it's kind of too long to go into why my female friends have difficulties committing to one person, after doing the opposite, but hey, let me not go into their personal...stuff.
Strange the guys can though...
Obviously we hang around different types of people.

Anyway people gotta shoot off...lol...coz it's getting late-ish the UK...places to go people to see...

Truly don't mean to offend anyone...I'm not perfect...yet.

If I've unknowingly offended maybe it's because you haven't haven't come across a guy with views such as mine who doesn't take anyone's bullshit too often...I could have really offended women if I wanted to, trust me...and with valid reasons, but what do u care anyway?!...apart from that no worries...life goes on...back teaching next week...I'll be less trouble then...

For the lovely ladies that have sent messages...thanks for making the effort...I'm surprised...a heartfelt positive vibe sent to you...
No need to thank anyone else, coz they'll take kindness for weakness and take a 'pop' at moi...
Remember I know you inside out...what I need to know anyway...

Just disagree with me and get over it already...

cu tomorrow...

La la la he he hee...
x

ERIN..

The logic may be fucked up but it IS how men see things, and I'm being honest with you. In sex, appearance matters as much as the real thing. That is why smart women who have had a lot of sex partners take care to conceal it from men they see as potential long-term partners. The truth is that if a women appears to be "easy" most men will not see her as a potential long-term partner.

Unfair - sure, fucked up - maybe, but that's how it is.

JustErin said:

papaaisaway said:

I didn't claim that it's not the way it is. I said, I think it's fucked.

And thankfully not all dudes have this very outdated and messed up logic. Actually, I can't think of any guy that I've been involved with that ever asked me what my sexual history was. Ever.

But I tend to not run with people that have rigid views on morality and such so I'm not really surprised.

JustErin said:

You know we don't always agree on things Erin, but I want to thank you for this excellent post. Well done.

funkyandy said:

If by this, you mean the medical myth that a woman's genitalia gets all stretched out and loose by way of frequent sex or multiple sex partners, it's just that. A myth.

It's, as you said, 2009. How can such grievous misinformation still be taken as fact? There is no damage done to a woman's body by having multiple partners or frequent sex. None.

meow85 said:

It can't seriously be what he is saying.

If so (and I still can't believe this is what he is saying) what would be the difference between having a lot of sex with one dude versus having sex once with 100 different guys?

JustErin said:

Somehow I don't think there would be.

I'm really curious to hear if that's what he meant or not.

meow85 said:

If it is...and if what he said about educating orgers about it via orgnotes actually happened....

Oh man....

JustErin said:

I know?

Come to think, I'm almost positive I've had some kind of similar exchange to this one with this orger under a different screenname over in P&R....

funkyandy said:

You're a teacher? What is the average age of your students?

sinisterpentatonic said:

hokie said:

i'd like to make you squeal like a pig.

kenlacam said:

Very good points. Also in the matter of serious relationships, marriage and paternity, it's only the last 15 years that cheap, easy DNA testing has become available.
A man wants to know that a child he's supporting and raising is HIS! A promiscuous woman might not be carrying YOUR kid, so there's always been a need to try to keep women in line by labeling and degrading them if they are too generous spreading da coochie around. Of course now that's not really necessary. For $300 and a quick trip to the lab, a man can be sure of paternity so that double standard might die down a little but it will probably never totally go away.
Try to understand ladies, you know the child you're carrying is yours but 3 out of 10 fathers are unknowingly raising someone else's kid. Ouch.

'He's' back...yeah him with his outdated views including the dreaded word 'morality'...such a terrible word these days isn't it JustErin?...lol...

Y'all haven't been talking about me behind my back now have you?!

Meow35!...your curiosity is satisfied...of course I didn't mean stretched out vaginas...OMG...absolutely ridiculous...that's nothing compared to...it's worse than that...way more viral...you really shouldn't be so proud to actually ask for more details you know...I have no ego.

Look, as totally expected all the comments since I've been away are predictable and mildly insulting, as is your way... also as predicted you've already made up your mind about who and what I am mainly because you disagree with me...no worries...completely expected.

I tried to engage with you but like I say as a sisterhood... you fall back into type with the usual gossip and backbiting...it's a shame because you could have learnt something from me and vice versa...in fact I've really surprised myself by staying on this thread this long knowing what I know...no offence...

Some advice to take or leave...it would really benefit you if you actually learned to genuinely like men?...as men...apart from sex...then once you've done that attempt to understand them?...actually I suspect you already do but are not really bothered as it's all about what you want...not saying you're entitlement princessess or anything.

Your last few responses have just given me more fuel for what I already knew...and for my book...

1)No matter what disagreements you have between you...when a man comes in the picture, even if he makes valid worthwhile statements...it's immediate solidarity...

2)I've long thought certain women don't care much for morality...rather, anything goes...again confirmed!

..and 'papaaisaway'...yeah.. best to hide the 'multiple sex partner' thing; from men...a real sign of the times that you consider it 'fucked up logic'...great to know that you would start a relationship with men based on lies...(if you're straight that is)...where are all the enlightened men that JustErin spoke about who wouldn't care about sexual history anyway?...such a joke...no worries, carry on ladies...(you've just gotta know that men are increasingly on to you though)...and rightly so if they care about quality relationships?

'Educating orgers via orgnotes', JustErin?...no...just discussing via email the medical evidence of mutiple partners on the tissues of the female anatomy... a permanent viral thing...the research of which was done by a woman (sigh)...I actually care about that kind of thing...to inform women who care about that kind of thing and in case I have a daughter you know?

Women I tried...and you're dealing with one who really wants to be the best of men...but do you see what you do?...every time?...thank God for the 10% of really sane women out there that I interact with.

Really read through my threads especially the long ones without prejudice to really understand where I'm coming from...only if you're bothered of course.

No offence, but the affectionate / humorous side of me would be completely wasted on some of you...so it's not really shown in this thread.

sextonseven...I refrain from answering your question as I'm taking my leave, so whatever you were going to say in response...is fine.

I have to leave you now...I won't return to this thread...so those that need to... hate away.

I appreciate your time though

Andrew

JustErin said:

That seems an appropriate response.



I am so glad I don't encounter dudes like this often in real life.

meow85 said:

oh my fucking god
so my friend, who had 100 partners, who possibly only did it 4 times a year is in the clear!

but uh oh, I'm in trouble then, I've been doing it like twice a week now at least for 25 years

CONFUSING...

Is this addressed to me? Btw, I haven't advocated starting a relationship based on lies. You're reading a bit too much into this. And for the record I'm a male. Heterosexual.

Good luck with your book.

funkyandy said:

JayJai said:

that's right!!!

That's not entirely true. If you know something about chemistry.
The male sperm and the womans moist have different acidity.
It's minor but technically the sperm is not good for the female body. except if you want kids offcourse

LeCram said:

those 2 fluids don't usually mix if folks are doing it safe!