would you allow your kids to start addressing someone you were dating (serious, but not marriage serious) as their step-dad? my sister has been dating this bum of a fellow for not quite a year and she allows her kids to refer to him in this way. i think it's ridiculous. not to mention they call his mother "na-na" which was they called my mom before she passed. given her terrible track record in relationships, i told her she was making a horrible mistake by allowing this happen. when (not if) they break up, her kids will be crushed because they think this guy is so great (trust me he's not).

No.

No, never.

Hell no.

She needs to get her priorities straight...Her kids should not be calling anyone by any name unless it's her and they should call her mama or mother. I can only see if this person is or has been in their lives since the begining or ever since they could speak. By letting them call them by a name that is so close or dear, it will confuse them.

How do I know? It's a delicate situation...

I have 2 kids from 2 different relationships (2 boys-I was married 2 one of their fathers) They are 6 and 5 years old. I am now re-married and I just had this discussion with my ex-husband.

My youngest calls my husband by his name, my oldest calls him by his name and also by dad or daddy. They each do know who their daddy is and can tell the differnce between all three men.

Thing is that my ex-husband lives in another state and his family thinks that my oldest is his and he went a long with it b/c he was with me while i was pregnant and knew he wasn't the father but just kept it like that (which shows that you don't have to be blood to be family-and never wanted to make a difference with any up coming kids that might have come in the future). The confusion came when he kept saying that he has 3 dads and when no one knows the story about it all, it sounds kind of triffeling. We got in a big arguement because my son said that he told him that he had only one dad and he got confused because he tried to explain it and I felt that it wasn't his right to try to confuse him like that. I only explain the situation to them when it comes up but they are some smart boys and I let them have their relationships with each men in their lives so they could make their own decisions on how they feel about them and never bash them for what they did or didn't do.

I know you have your arms folded and shaking your head everytime you see your sister and her kids around this guy but your sister has to make her own mistakes - how else will she learn. I know you have told her what you need to tell her and you did your part, it's now up to her to either take your advice or live her life. Just be there for her when the time is needed.

No.

no way jose