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Anyone else here constantly betrayed by love? So far in my life, every single man that I have loved has hurt me deeply. I learn from past mistakes and know that I'm growing as a person. I think the biggest hurdle I face is that I feel SO much and rarely can connect on that level without freaking people out. I hope that at least once in my life I can experience the love in return that I am capable of giving...
Anyone else in my camp? 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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Do you need a hug? 
I don't allow myself to be hurt anymore. I have become selective in the type of man I date...Rule number 1 is if you cheat on me it is over... But another thing I have learned is that there is always something to learn from each relationship that we enter..So when it is over thank the person for your lesson and move on... ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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I sweated somebody once   
And she played me   
And from that time forward, I said NEVER AGAIN.  
So now, I'm just too STANK. "That...magic, the start of something revolutionary-the Minneapolis Sound, we should cherish it and not punish prince for not being able to replicate it."-Dreamshaman32 | |
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:O Has Spooky returned?  | |
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LaVisHh said:
:O Has Spooky returned? I think so. Look out! | |
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I wouldn't say "constantly", but the betrayal by my ex-husband has scarred me. He was the first man I did everything with, and what he did, made it very difficult for me to trust, like I trusted him. 
My only other long-term relationship basically told me after a woman is 30, she is over the hill, and a man will only stay with her if he chooses to "settle" and bow to the life society claims is proper - marriage.
So it's a lose/lose situation for my two experiences...it really makes me want to raise my daughter alone and never have another close relationship, and make myself vulnerable...the first relationship lasted 12 years...the second 9 years.  | |
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When the right one comes along, old fear will fall away with almost no effort. Relax...  Fear is the mind-killer. | |
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LaVisHh said: I wouldn't say "constantly", but the betrayal by my ex-husband has scarred me. He was the first man I did everything with, and what he did, made it very difficult for me to trust, like I trusted him.
My only other long-term relationship basically told me after a woman is 30, she is over the hill, and a man will only stay with her if he chooses to "settle" and bow to the life society claims is proper - marriage.
So it's a lose/lose situation for my two experiences...it really makes me want to raise my daughter alone and never have another close relationship, and make myself vulnerable...the first relationship lasted 12 years...the second 9 years. I guess your daughter is your priority but never say never! U don't know what, or who, could be just around the corner if u're still open to the possibility. | |
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LaVisHh said: I wouldn't say "constantly", but the betrayal by my ex-husband has scarred me. He was the first man I did everything with, and what he did, made it very difficult for me to trust, like I trusted him.
My only other long-term relationship basically told me after a woman is 30, she is over the hill, and a man will only stay with her if he chooses to "settle" and bow to the life society claims is proper - marriage.
So it's a lose/lose situation for my two experiences...it really makes me want to raise my daughter alone and never have another close relationship, and make myself vulnerable...the first relationship lasted 12 years...the second 9 years. Oh my dear don't give up! SOmeone wonderful is waiting just for you. What a mean thing to say to a woman...good got! Sometimes people say the meanest things to each other..  ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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Also, I cannot stand women much under the age of 30--there's a lot to be said for the "settled" life and a focus on more important things besides parties and whatnot...
30-40 is your PRIME. Fear is the mind-killer. | |
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sawatdiikhrap said: LaVisHh said: I wouldn't say "constantly", but the betrayal by my ex-husband has scarred me. He was the first man I did everything with, and what he did, made it very difficult for me to trust, like I trusted him.
My only other long-term relationship basically told me after a woman is 30, she is over the hill, and a man will only stay with her if he chooses to "settle" and bow to the life society claims is proper - marriage.
So it's a lose/lose situation for my two experiences...it really makes me want to raise my daughter alone and never have another close relationship, and make myself vulnerable...the first relationship lasted 12 years...the second 9 years. I guess your daughter is your priority but never say never! U don't know what, or who, could be just around the corner if u're still open to the possibility. This is one of the hardest parts, remaining open. I'm working on it but damn if it isn't hard to do. 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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sag10 said: Oh my dear don't give up! SOmeone wonderful is waiting just for you.
What a mean thing to say to a woman...good got! Sometimes people say the meanest things to each other.. What really sucks is after 9 years of him giving me examples and telling me this...I actually believe him. | |
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sawatdiikhrap said: I guess your daughter is your priority but never say never!
U don't know what, or who, could be just around the corner if u're still open to the possibility. Thank you. My door isn't closed, but anyone who has tried to get close to me would tell you that I am very afraid to get that close again.
I hope you and teller are right!  | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: This is one of the hardest parts, remaining open. I'm working on it but damn if it isn't hard to do.
It is extremely hard. Like a sheild between you and another relationship.
4 you. | |
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teller said: Also, I cannot stand women much under the age of 30--there's a lot to be said for the "settled" life and a focus on more important things besides parties and whatnot...
30-40 is your PRIME. One day my prince will come... | |
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Oh, and sag10 Just cuz. | |
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As we get older we begin to recognize these weaknesses in ourselves and others--and not to run away screaming the first time we are pushed away by fear. The tide will turn--you will see. Fear is the mind-killer. | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: So far in my life, every single man that I have loved has hurt me deeply. I learn from past mistakes and know that I'm growing as a person. I think the biggest hurdle I face is that I feel SO much and rarely can connect on that level without freaking people out. I hope that at least once in my life I can experience the love in return that I am capable of giving...
Anyone else in my camp? You aren't being betrayed by love, you are being betrayed by lust. "Climb in my fur." | |
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LaVisHh said: sag10 said: Oh my dear don't give up! SOmeone wonderful is waiting just for you.
What a mean thing to say to a woman...good got! Sometimes people say the meanest things to each other.. What really sucks is after 9 years of him giving me examples and telling me this...I actually believe him. Don't you believe him LavisHh. You are adorable, and what he speaks is not truth... Mental abuse is horrible, it isn't good for anyone's self-esteem. Oh, that pisses me off! ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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teller said: Also, I cannot stand women much under the age of 30--there's a lot to be said for the "settled" life and a focus on more important things besides parties and whatnot...
30-40 is your PRIME. thank you sweetie  | |
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rdhull said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: So far in my life, every single man that I have loved has hurt me deeply. I learn from past mistakes and know that I'm growing as a person. I think the biggest hurdle I face is that I feel SO much and rarely can connect on that level without freaking people out. I hope that at least once in my life I can experience the love in return that I am capable of giving...
Anyone else in my camp? You aren't being betrayed by love, you are being betrayed by lust. What are you saying Mr Hull? Explain further please. 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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LaVisHh said: I wouldn't say "constantly", but the betrayal by my ex-husband has scarred me. He was the first man I did everything with, and what he did, made it very difficult for me to trust, like I trusted him.
My only other long-term relationship basically told me after a woman is 30, she is over the hill, and a man will only stay with her if he chooses to "settle" and bow to the life society claims is proper - marriage.
So it's a lose/lose situation for my two experiences...it really makes me want to raise my daughter alone and never have another close relationship, and make myself vulnerable...the first relationship lasted 12 years...the second 9 years. You've just been with some fucked up men imo. Dont let two idiots make you jaded and generalize like that. "Climb in my fur." | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: rdhull said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: So far in my life, every single man that I have loved has hurt me deeply. I learn from past mistakes and know that I'm growing as a person. I think the biggest hurdle I face is that I feel SO much and rarely can connect on that level without freaking people out. I hope that at least once in my life I can experience the love in return that I am capable of giving...
Anyone else in my camp? You aren't being betrayed by love, you are being betrayed by lust. What are you saying Mr Hull? Explain further please. Your boyfriends betrayed you because of their lust for others..not because of love. Not saying they didn't love you but some folks dont know what love is and think being with soemone in a relationship is love etc...nope. If they-he loved you, the lust for others would have been contained enough for him/them not to act on it. Because you love someone doesn't mean that you dont get aroused by others such as a beautiful woman or man etc..but if you love that person you are with then you most defintely wouldn't act on it.. imo. "Climb in my fur." | |
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rdhull said: You've just been with some fucked up men imo. Dont let two idiots make you jaded and generalize like that.
I agree. The problem is to meet men who don't think this way, if I would just let them.  Pretty messed up | |
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LaVisHh said:
:O Has Spooky returned?
Yeah Spooky gets the upperhand in this sitchoowashun all the time now. "That...magic, the start of something revolutionary-the Minneapolis Sound, we should cherish it and not punish prince for not being able to replicate it."-Dreamshaman32 | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: I feel SO much
That is a GOOD thing..it also sets you up to be dogged and taken advantage of but dont ever regret or lose that "feeling SO much" aspect...ever! "Climb in my fur." | |
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rdhull said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: rdhull said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: So far in my life, every single man that I have loved has hurt me deeply. I learn from past mistakes and know that I'm growing as a person. I think the biggest hurdle I face is that I feel SO much and rarely can connect on that level without freaking people out. I hope that at least once in my life I can experience the love in return that I am capable of giving...
Anyone else in my camp? You aren't being betrayed by love, you are being betrayed by lust. What are you saying Mr Hull? Explain further please. Your boyfriends betrayed you because of their lust for others..not because of love. Not saying they didn't love you but some folks dont know what love is and think being with soemone in a relationship is love etc...nope. If they-he loved you, the lust for others would have been contained enough for him/them not to act on it. Because you love someone doesn't mean that you dont get aroused by others such as a beautiful woman or man etc..but if you love that person you are with then you most defintely wouldn't act on it.. imo. Not all of them cheated on me. Some of it was simply the fact that I truly loved them and they didn't truly love me. 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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LaVisHh said: rdhull said: You've just been with some fucked up men imo. Dont let two idiots make you jaded and generalize like that.
I agree. The problem is to meet men who don't think this way, if I would just let them. Pretty messed up You have cause to think and feel gaurded etc...you just have to change your cognitions,the way you think about whats happened and why. You know in your heart that they were messed up..that it was not you and that you are worthy etc. And that this does not mean that you cant ever find someone decent so to speak. "Climb in my fur." | |
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NuPwrSoul said: LaVisHh said:
:O Has Spooky returned?
Yeah Spooky gets the upperhand in this sitchoowashun all the time now.
I don't get STANK, but I tend to back away... | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Not all of them cheated on me. Some of it was simply the fact that I truly loved them and they didn't truly love me.
Well there is nothing you can do about that. We all exoerience that. You can't make someone love you. No matter how hard you love them. "Climb in my fur." | |
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