Do you remember having nightmares as a child? Or even night terrors?
Were they extremely vivid?
How did you find comfort right afterwards?

I used to have them a lot as a child... very graphic ones, guns, family getting hurt or even killed... it really was horrible...
When my sister was living in Toronto, I would call her (i was no more than 6 or 7 at the time) - long distance to my mother's dismay - so she could calm me down... my mom would work nights, and my dad had early mornings, so I never wanted to disturb him...

What's crazy is now, my niece, my sister's daughter, has just turned 6 and has been recently having pretty bad nightmares... at least to where she wakes up at night and stays up until she can find someone to calm her nerves...
The poor thing... she just came into my room, at 2:30am, crying... I think she was afraid to tell me what she dreamt, either that, or she was still very confused about whether or not it was real...
She dreamt that bees were stinging her all over her body... and I hate seeing her so shaken - in fact, I haven't seen her so shaken before... To the point where she refused to go back in the spare room to sleep by herself...

She's sleeping beside me now it really broke my heart, I hope she feels better in the morning...


Did you have nightmares/terrors? Do your kids? How did you deal with either situation?

No. But I remember my mom having them. Well, sometimes I'd hear cries and moans from her and her boyfriend's room and I'd yell out "Mommy!" from my room.
She'd reply "Go back to sleep, honey. Mommy was just having a nightmare." I guess they were recurring.

Why am I not in therapy?

johnart said:

sammij said:

Thank you.

I do hope your niece feels better and that the bad dreams start to fade away.

My neice does too. She gets up screaming and sometimes even running. Freaks me out b/c I am too scared to wake her but I have to stop her from possibly hurting herself.

purpleizpassion said:

I'm afraid that she'll progress to that... how do you deal with that kind of situation?
Even tonight, she came into my room in a straight up daze, when I took her hand in mine she started crying - I think that's when she really woke up...

I hated when it happened to me, I'd never wish that kind of feeling on another little child...

...I know it's all involuntary, but man...

johnart said:

Well, she hasn't really been moving around, I think she's relaxed now, thank goodness

I had nightmares as a child, and I occasionally have them now.

When I was small, I generally had the Jason/Halloween type variety with the dark looming figure trying to catch me, or waiting down the hall poising his attack. I don't remember how I delt with them.

The ones that I have now, somehow I've reached a state of consciousness where I actually recognize within the dream that it's a dream, and I spend a lot of time trying to will myself out of it. I literally start talking to myself, whatever or whoever else is in the dream to make it clear that I'm not succumbing.

This is generally when I start talking in my sleep. I will usually tell myself, "this is a nightmare,you have to wake up", and I'll do something like like focus on intensive breathing to will myself awake (VERY difficult to do), or I instruct myself to give my hair a pull at the roots so I can startle myself awake. That's a reaally slow and arduous process to get your limbs to move and perform a conscious action while you're asleep.

Otherwise, for a typical predator/darkman dream, I've gotten to the point that if I can't lock the door before they break in or whatever, I just say loudly and firmly that no, they are not taking me, capturing me, or hurting me, period... and that if they try it, I'm not afraid of them and I'm going to be the one to hurt them.

I hope niecy feels better, though. I don't know what you say to them to make it better for them though
[Edited 7/11/09 0:10am]

I hate night terrors my entire childhood. If this is something that is more than occassionaly, she should really be evaluated for a sleep disorder. There isn't much info about children with sleep disorders, but that is a huge indicator. There may be very minor things that can be done to stop this terrible experience.

sammij said:

Its hard. Can't say I know what else to do besides get her to reality and feeling safe quickly. Staying calm. It was worse when she was younger. Now its just a lot of talking in her sleep. Sometimes screaming. Her siblings don't do it but she's so different. An old soul... knows too much ( as the old folks say), very sensitive. You are a loving Auntie and I am sure you are doing your best. It can be so unnerving to see a child so upset...

My 4 yo has a night terror EVERY night, about 45 minutes after falling asleep. He screams and squirms for 10 minutes, then when he's done I put him back into bed. He never remembers them. My middle one had exactly the same except he sleepwalked too, and my eldest had almost waking type nightmares, he would see things and it gave me heebiegeebies, one night we both ran down the corridor because something terrifying was chasing us!

I had night terrors as a little girl, now I just get bad nightmares but I’ve just had to except them. At least they make some good stories even if they are very weird.

Our 10 year old girl has night terrors, not as bad as when she was very young.

But she'll still wake up sometimes just absolutely terrified and confused. It's heartbreaking, because you can't get through to her until she totally wakes up; that or she just goes back to sleep.

ZombieKitten said:

I'm sorry, my heart goes out to you but that last part is also hilarious.

When I was younger, right after my mom and dad got divorced, I use to dream he would come back. (after they got divorced he just split and never returned)

But when he would come back in my dream, I would be sooooo happy and excited to see him. Then all of a sudden he would get shot or killed
Then i'd be heartbroken. Wake up crying and what not. But i'd never tell my mom what happened in my dreams.

johnart said:

are you sure they were moans of fear?

Nightmares were never a big problem (they've always been more weird than scary for me), but I did have occasional night terrors and sleep paralysis from my late teens through mid-20s.

The paralysis was freaky: I remember being semi-conscious yet frozen some mornings, trying my hardest to budge and unreasonably haunted by the notion a murderer might come into my room, and I'd be a sitting duck. But the night terrors were far more of a terror to my college roommate and wife than to me; they'd be petrified by my waking up screaming, but I'd remember absolutely nothing scary.

Eventually, I just grew out of this, and the only variable that had changed was certain unnecessary stress in my life.
[Edited 7/11/09 21:10pm]

Thanks everyone for the input, she's better today, was making some art and now she's riding her bike... it doesn't really seem to phase her now, unless you bring it up...

StillGotIt said:

I'll have to ask her mother how often it happens, because i was actually quite scared for her...

ZombieKitten said:

i couldn't ever imagine having to deal with more than one child going through the same thing!
it's so heartbreaking... how did you manage to cope with them?

Wishuponastar said:

yeah, nowadays i write them down and really research symbols and stuff, but it's hard for a little 6 year old, i'll never forget feeling like i was going crazy because of the things i saw in my mind's eye while asleep

PunkMistress said:

that's what happened to me until i took her in my arms, she snapped right out of it and started crying...

thekidsgirl said:

sammij said:

My dirty mind super-senses are telling me that John's post was meant to be a bit naughty

I feel for your niece...I used to have nightmares quite often when I was younger, but I'd just wake up and read or watch tv, until I was ready to go back to sleep. My mother has bad nightmares, where she will yell in her sleep and often wake up and call the people she dreamed about, to make sure they are okay

thekidsgirl said:

i used to do that sometimes it gets that scary!

I still have nightmares ALL The time.....

About Murder, violence, heart break...and more..

Sometimes I don't sleep 4 days cause of dreams....

They usualy happen when I go through a recent tramatic exspirience...
it triggers the nightmares....

I think it has 2 do with a chemical inbalence in my brain....
And I want to see a doctor abut this..but don't know where 2 go...
[Edited 7/11/09 11:07am]

nyse said:

i would just go to your regular family doctor and have him refer you to a sleep specialist

good advice....Though i don't have a doctor...have not been in years.
But i should look up a sleep specialist in my area...

TY

I still do, I have had the same one well basically the same one since I was little. Being chased forever, without ever being caught by a terminator type person. They never give up, but they never catch me. It's exhausting!!

PunkMistress said:

he was very convincing! It was dark and he could see something I couldn't see I got very spooked

.
[Edited 7/11/09 20:11pm]