A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot. The doctor

comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness". Now you

probably

won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going



to be ok, you'll walk again and everything, but.....your penis was severed



in the accident and we couldn't find it.



The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You've got $9000 in insurance

compensation coming

and we now have the technology to build a new penis." They work great but

they don't come cheap. It's $1000 an inch.



The man perks up. "So," the doctor says, "you must decide how many inches

you want." But this is something you

should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a

nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher

before and

you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed.

It's

important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.



The man agrees to talk it over with his wife. The doctor comes back the

next day, "So,

have you spoken with your wife?"



Yes I have," says the man. "And has she helped you make a decision?"



Yes" says the man. What is your decision?" asks the doctor.



We're getting granite countertops."

what has two legs and bleeds?



half a dog.

Steadwood said:

or a nun after a scat session.

GhostlyNun said: