Mach said:

Overall they're really good kids. I just don't have the energy for them for that long of a time.

XxAxX said:

and a nice Dad to clam the hell outta the FREAK Mom who would KILL children

Oh wait - we arnt just talking about my kids are we

CarrieMpls said:

My kids are pretty good too cuz they know they would DIE otherwise

Mach said:

I am at the point now that I want to kick my son out off my house


I won't do that but teenagers ughh

AndGodCreatedMe said:

I think thigs like this naturally happen so we slowly, willingly cut the apron strings and become comfortable with them really leaving ...

Mach said:

And I only have 1 I have calmed down now but the hurtful things they can say (and sometimes they are right but that's not relevant!!)

AndGodCreatedMe said:

A lot of times they are right and though it's often painful it's one of the things I like ... specially comming from my children

I have learned SO so much about life and myself FROM my kids - I am open to them teachingme as much as I teach them

Mach said:

orgnote

AndGodCreatedMe said:

Been there.

I didn't realize sanity was an option.

We have always had a lot of structure, but children are wired to push boundries. No one in our house is direspectful or disruptive, but I have a lot of teens and the constant fussing, complaining, music, dancing, begging for something, repeating yourself, following up behind chores, etc. . does wear me out mentally. My husband just sits down on the couch and falls asleep in the middle of it all. I wish I could be him.

I only have a few years left for this too and I know that I will miss it also.

For me, some sense of perspective and boundaries helps.

Authority: I expect my daughter to be annoyed or incredulous -- and I want her to voice it -- at some of the things I decide. Parents who completely forbid kids' challenges baffle me. Healthy, empowered persons must learn to appropriately question authority and advocate for themselves... otherwise we get things like the Bush regime. At the same time, my kid's gotta know that my household ain't always a democratic state... and that even in instances of protest, there's a point beyond which roles are no longer being respected... and there are consequences for that.

Chores: Ain't no philosophizing here: Keep your *#@!! clean or have it thrown out or given to charity. If my daughter needs therapy later because of this, hopefully she'll have legal status in Canada by then and the government will pay for it!

Loudness: Uggh. I'm still working on that one. Part of my problem here is that my wife is loud... so my kid thinks it's normal to have the TV and radio going while she's practicing cartwheels and singing High School Musical songs. I guess I've learned some give and take here: Because right now we've got no basement or backyard, I accept a bit of thumping and noisy play. My kid's only 8 . But there are hours that absolutely must be quiet, both for my own sanity and so she learns discipline and the value of downtime.

As long as my household can exist within these parameters, I'm good.
[Edited 4/24/09 10:01am]

Basically the Pros far exceed the Cons


What i do know though is nothing handicaps your kids more than spoiling them

In life you can't always get what you want and usually what you do get, as we all know, you have to work your butt off for.

The sooner kids learn that lesson the easier their life will be.

Mach said:

AMEN!!!

This is how you stay sane as a parent.

xanaxlots of it!!!

yall beter pull ou those tapes of bernie mac....he says he'll fuck a kid up!

my cousin said we better leave him alone....cause he bought some damn extenzzzzze... and he already got, he say, 7.5 inches.....imma make sure that freak got plenty hair to pull and put a xanax in that fu kkers drank.

CarrieMpls said:

Yeah, I can't really be around my niece and nephew (6 & 4) much more than a day. They always come over to my parent's house for dinner when I visit and it drives me insane that their mother (my sis-in-law) does not make them sit at the dinner table and EAT. They take about two bites then run into the living room to watch some cartoon crap on TV or play games on the computer. My niece is a brat...one time I doing a puzzle with her and she intentionally dumped all the pieces on the floor, then walked away. I said, "You need to come back and pick those up." She at me and walked away.

I only lose my sanity when my daughter's not around.

i got a niece who is 40 years old, but she is slightly autistic and has the mind of a 12 year old. .....she will runin the room, lift up her shirt and say "what?" "what i do?", drives us insane. .....there, there... ...

violator said:

I totally relate !

DevotedPuppy said:

I have grandchildren that need just a tad more serious discipline ( in my book ) I do not have to live with them so ... that's the reality that their parents are creating for their journey raising kids - not mine

there's a lot of good answers here and from these answers it's easy to see that there isn't a catch all formula that works for all families...
I'm bothered by some comments I've read here, not on this thread but others, from people (generally those without children) that incessantly piss and moan about the behavoir of children...I understand that there are plenty of bad kids but I can't help but wonder if everybodys idea of a "bratty" or "bad" child is the the same...I think some people take the definition to an extreme...many times folks want kids to be mini adults...to me, thats just wrong...while there has to be structure and discipline, kids should be afforded the opportunity to be kids...to do the things that kids do...sometimes, kids stuff is annoying to adults...many adults don't remember what it's like to experience life as a child...I never, ever wanna rob my kids of that just because their normal behavior may bother somebody...

roodboi said:

Kids are KIDS and for a very short time really

Mach said:

Yes,they are...



and even when they reach a certain age you still tend so see them as they were little and depending on you..(which they are not but you want to believe that)

Ok enough I'm gonna kick his ass when he comes home, he needs it

I would love to hand off my nephews to all the "experts" and watch them break

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Send them over (only if you pay for their tickets )

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Mach said:

i feel ya there


my life is centered around my kids. they are my reason for most everything i do in life. they are not perfect, but i have no desire for perfect children. we have a relationship that is beautiful in my eyes - sure they have their days when they buck the system and try new and exciting ways of life but its short lived for the most part and then they are back in the program. my kids are my works of art, they are made up of everything that i (the artist) think is important....

they are polite - always say please and thank you, yes maam/sir and no maam/sir when speaking to someone in public. they respect their elders and value a conversation with an adult who can teach them something they may not have thought of before. they stand up for what they know is right and fight against what they know is wrong. they empathize with others and express genuine concern for situations where they know someone or something is being hurt - then try to find ways to help make it better. they have been raised to be a leader and not a follower, i never want them making decisions based on the crowd, they are to remember the importance of their name and everything it takes to keep that clean. our rule here at the house is - all you really have to offer is your word, give it with respect and honor what you say. they are both very bright and 98% of the time give the best, most honest answer when asked a question. they both have a great sense of humor and try to look at life through the eyes of laughter - its better i think to be able to find the positive and deal with lifes bumps with a laugh and a good joke than taking it all to heart. we have conversations about what i expect from them as far as when to start a family, drugs, drinking, honesty, grades, school, jobs, and how to treat others in your life on a regular basis... they know that i will always expect this of them whether im here or out of sight or when eventually i am no longer living. this is how they were raised and i expect nothing less of them at any age.

however, they argue back and forth as all kids do. they know i hate that when they do it and for the most part i can get it to stop as quick as it started. we have ups and downs and struggles in school - but they work hard to overcome any difficulties that face them. as far as chores go, they definately could do more, but in the end i feel like its the people i am raising to go out in the world that is most important. do i have all the answers? hell no, never have but i rest my head every night knowing that they are solid young children who have a great core and i know that that will never change.

i love hanging out with my kids, i love the way they make me see life and i love to see the people they are becoming. i miss them when they are gone and i would have never been remotely close to sane without them - they are my good and my bad, my sunshine and my rain, my love and my confusion - they keep me balanced and i hope i have done the same for them....


oops edit
[Edited 4/24/09 11:09am]

roodboi said:

I really appreciate you saying that!!!

Having a child of your own is the only Vacine to fight against the social disease that is other peoples children.
[Edited 4/24/09 11:59am]

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[Edited 4/24/09 12:10pm]

chillichocaholic said: