Last night I got a phone call from a cousin who I saw on my trip to cali this past weekend. I had not seen nor talked to her for 30 years. She asked me some very pointed questions and when I answered her, honestly and openly she began to cry.

This woman is 51 years old, been a prostitute and a drug addict all of her life and she said to me " You have rescued me spiritually and validated everything I knew was right and true but convinced not to tell."


Family Secrets are devestating and horrible. I am at peace this morning because I had made my journey many years ago from those terrible times and now someone who I had never even considered, not at all really, has been helped by my refusal to remain silent.

Good for you. It feels good doesn't it?

butterfli25 said:

hokie said:

yes it does. the saddest part is that when we were younger (me and all the younger cousins) we had been told that she was bad, a problem, crazy, and told not to contact her or let her contact you. She told me that she was surprised that I gave her my number. But when she called i was not surprised, I could tell she wanted to talk to me and now that we are older she knew it would not be looked at as corrupting a child anymore. I knew the secrets I had kept so I figured she wanted to talk about it, she was always so troubled and it started when she was so young. Now I know that that is predictable considering everything she went through.

butterfli25 said:

That is awesome...

Finding out I am a descendant of Atillah the hun blew my fuckin' mind

The effect of some "dirty laundry" can be astoundingly destructive not only for individuals, but sometimes entire branches and generations of our extended families.

What a great thing to hear about you and your cousin, butterfli. Who knows just how lives might be changed for your honesty?

Now I hope your cousin can find the support she needs to change her life where it's needed elsewhere.

butterfli25 said:

keep shining the light in those dark corners! be proud, babe.

Maybe she'll be freed of her burden now That's wonderful, sweetie.

butterfli25 said:

that is all I can say without tearing up.

My cousin died from Diabetes back in '98. When a me and a few of my cousins looked at his prom picture, which they used on the obituary program, we noticed that he looked like ANOTHER one of my uncles . My cousin's mom was married to one of my uncles, but at the same time she was working at my other uncle's clothing store . One time I was at my aunt's store and my other aunt was there, I said something about my uncle and something in her just switched and she started saying that he was this, that, the third, fourth, and fifth, and I was just like "WHOA." So it turns out he was my other uncle's son

you may beacatalyst to hers or someone elses burden bearment one day.

myfavorite said:

that is why I posted. you never know who you are helping.

butterfli25 said:

You have no idea how emboldened I am by this I am about to shed the non-secret secret I've never told my dad's side of the family. I'm starting with my grandmother this Saturday I'm blessed to be connected to such a spiritually aware sister and I love you very much for that

butterfli25 said:

Part of me is very sad that she was shunned from the family when that is probably what she needed the most. I am so proud that your brave heart is able to tell the truth and to love someone inspite of and through it

And how amazing that she saw something in you that she needed, even though you might not even have been aware you were being seen.

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[Edited 3/18/09 13:32pm]

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

love you baby isn't funny how we always do this for each other?

butterfli25 said:

Yes! When I start my Angel City, you are going to be one of the first Angel/Leader/Teacher/Healers I call on!

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I'll be here for you always.

butterfli25 said:

And I, YOU!

luv4u said:

thanks for being there for me the other night, I am so spiritually sensitive sometimes and the comforting words and listening heart you gave me means the world, my friend. you calmed my spirit and validated my feelings.

butterfli25 said:

i always kno who i help....cause i really dont.

butterfli25 said:

You're welcome, anytime

God bless you for speaking truth. It's toughest to do in families.

I would have appreciated it.