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PrintableThis just reminds me so much of the movie "Little Children."
Stuff can start, no matter what types of "safeguards" (children, parks, daytime meetings) folks put in place. In your case, it seems you'd be the only adult trying to keep it from going elsewhere. And, yeah, if my hypothetical wife were headed to such a meeting, I'd be ticked. | |
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That was an enjoyable movie  I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at the dirt. | |
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rushing07 said: That was an enjoyable movie
Kate Winslet.  | |
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728huey said: ZombieKitten said: Anyway, I guess my thread is less me asking you all for permission to go on a NOT DATE, but more a lament that it is not the done thing, and that doing so makes it OK for all to assume (the guy, most of the thread-respondents on this thread) it was going to be a hook-up. Everyone assumes a married woman meeting a guy IS has to be for sex, because there can simply be no other reason why they might meet, can there?
 If you really want to see your old crush but don't want to have sex with him or give the impression that you might consider it, why don't you meet up casually during the day or preferably on a weekend afternoon at a public place like a mall or something and if possible, bring the kids along. That would send the old crush a clear signal that he can;t expect to hook up with you that easily (though he may email or text you to meet up later). BTW, my best friend called me earlier and told me about how she went out to a club with her girlfriends and had a number of married men hitting on her.  Now I understand why some guys want to hit on her since she keeps her body in great shape even though she is in her late 30's, but married men? How clueless or horny do you have to be to hit on some other chick when you have a wife at home unless you're a manwhore looking for something on the side. 
 I have had too many encounters with married men to know this must be common practice. | |
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Vendetta1 said: sextonseven said: Having read through this whole thread, you've gotten lots of good advice and I think you already know what to do so no need for me to add anything.
I'm sorry i didn't keep my hands to myself last time I saw you. Does this mean I have to keep my hands to myself when you visit? 
 You have no idea how much I was looking forward to that. Next time we have to meet in the summer so we're both not wearing so much clothes. My hands couldn't find you under your big coat. | |
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ZombieKitten said: sextonseven said: Having read through this whole thread, you've gotten lots of good advice and I think you already know what to do so no need for me to add anything.
Does this mean I have to keep my hands to myself when you visit? you are a total gentleman and that is why I love you Are you saying I'm not that kind of guy?
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ThreadBare said: This just reminds me so much of the movie "Little Children."
Stuff can start, no matter what types of "safeguards" (children, parks, daytime meetings) folks put in place. In your case, it seems you'd be the only adult trying to keep it from going elsewhere. And, yeah, if my hypothetical wife were headed to such a meeting, I'd be ticked. Great movie. | |
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myfavorite said: Fauxie said: I'm so naive. I kinda started an online friendship with a woman, feeling cool with developing it because (a) I had no desire to sleep with her, and (b) because she's a nurse. I mean, she looked sensible, level-headed etc.
 - not a young girl who would misread the situation, especially considering she knew I was married. But, after a short time she kept sending me messages asking to be my 'mia nawy' (literally 'small wife', a mistress) and assumed that as a married man interacting with a woman, that was my motivation for doing so. The only thing I did that could have been construed as flirtation was complimenting her appearance in some of her pics (i.e. nice smile in this one, cool pic etc.)
I just don't have a lot of friends here and sometimes feel like I'd like to make some. I tend to prefer the company of women. It's not always easy, it seems.   | |
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Serious said: ZombieKitten said: the thing is, all I wanted was to maybe get an ice-cream, sit out in the sun for a bit - he lives in a great beachside/cafe neighbourhood and have a gasbag. I don't like that THAT isn't cool to do, that men and women who may (or may not) have some kind of spark there, can't get together with no sexual agenda - I wish this was europe, it's OK over there. By the sounds of it, it must be even worse in the states. Why can't men just keep it in their pants and NOT keep misinterpreting everything as a come-on  why does a guy assume a girl he is attracted to, wants to have sex with him just because HE is good looking (THAT in my opinion makes him a manwhore) that assumption makes him an ugly human being in my view.In Europe men assume too that women they are attracted to want to have sex with them  .Yes they do, and actually a nice casual ice cream date is what evolved into my last divorce. Better to be on the side of caution, no matter where you live | |
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minneapolisgenius said: ZombieKitten said: no chance then, this guy probably couldn't care less who I am unless I boffed him Well, then definitely don't go. If someone doesn't even like you as a person or care about who you are, then why waste time even knowing them at all?  Especially if you are not looking for someone to sleep with (as you said).anyway, I never actually considered going, all I did was wonder how it got from "it would be fun to catch up again!" to being a hook-up in 5 seconds flat and my ensuing disgust which led me to starting this thread. | |
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heartbeatocean said: I lament as well, with others on this thread, that it's hard to be friends with the opposite sex sometimes. I have always enjoyed hanging out with guys, just as friends and as I get older it becomes more of a no-no.
Luckily I live in an area where half the men are gay, so I can hang out with them all I like!  yes, more gay friends needed, only on the proviso they do not comment on my choice of footwear, they can get lost otherwise | |
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sextonseven said: ZombieKitten said: you are a total gentleman and that is why I love you Are you saying I'm not that kind of guy?
I'm saying we both are but we have a very clear understanding that there's not gonna be any funny business | |
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sextonseven said: ThreadBare said: This just reminds me so much of the movie "Little Children."
Stuff can start, no matter what types of "safeguards" (children, parks, daytime meetings) folks put in place. In your case, it seems you'd be the only adult trying to keep it from going elsewhere. And, yeah, if my hypothetical wife were headed to such a meeting, I'd be ticked. Great movie. It is great movie, and I think a long time ago I asked Kitten if she saw it | |
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Ottensen said: sextonseven said: Great movie. It is great movie, and I think a long time ago I asked Kitten if she saw it I think I went ahead and hired it because I was going through a tough time and someone suggested I have an affair   but I did enjoy the movie - I even think it was sextonseven who recommended it 
both the protagonists in this movie had VERY lacking marriages. It was clear to me they were unhappy and unfulfilled, and I do think the sin=suffering was harsh in the end. | |
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ZombieKitten said: Ottensen said: It is great movie, and I think a long time ago I asked Kitten if she saw it I think I went ahead and hired it because I was going through a tough time and someone suggested I have an affair but I did enjoy the movie - I even think it was sextonseven who recommended it
both the protagonists in this movie had VERY lacking marriages. It was clear to me they were unhappy and unfulfilled, and I do think the sin=suffering was harsh in the end. I don't know if you or Sexton have seen it, but I wanted to ask if Winslet's latest movie Revolutionary Road tackles the same subject matter? You know, tough times in marriage, ethical questions, ect? I'm dying to see it but there's only the dubbed version here and I was wondering if it was worth me plucking down the money to see it anyway... | |
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Ottensen said: ZombieKitten said: I think I went ahead and hired it because I was going through a tough time and someone suggested I have an affair but I did enjoy the movie - I even think it was sextonseven who recommended it
both the protagonists in this movie had VERY lacking marriages. It was clear to me they were unhappy and unfulfilled, and I do think the sin=suffering was harsh in the end. I don't know if you or Sexton have seen it, but I wanted to ask if Winslet's latest movie Revolutionary Road tackles the same subject matter? You know, tough times in marriage, ethical questions, ect? I'm dying to see it but there's only the dubbed version here and I was wondering if it was worth me plucking down the money to see it anyway... I haven't seen it - I probably would if Leonardo DiCrapio wasn't in it, I have a major aversion to that man  | |
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sextonseven said: ThreadBare said: This just reminds me so much of the movie "Little Children."
Stuff can start, no matter what types of "safeguards" (children, parks, daytime meetings) folks put in place. In your case, it seems you'd be the only adult trying to keep it from going elsewhere. And, yeah, if my hypothetical wife were headed to such a meeting, I'd be ticked. Great movie. When was that movie in theatres?? | |
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sextonseven said: Vendetta1 said: I'm sorry i didn't keep my hands to myself last time I saw you.
You have no idea how much I was looking forward to that. Next time we have to meet in the summer so we're both not wearing so much clothes. My hands couldn't find you under your big coat.  | |
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Vendetta1 said: sextonseven said: You have no idea how much I was looking forward to that. Next time we have to meet in the summer so we're both not wearing so much clothes. My hands couldn't find you under your big coat. well how about SPRING | |
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ZombieKitten said: Vendetta1 said: well how about SPRING How bout all 4 of you come to DC  If you will, so will I | |
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ZombieKitten said: Vendetta1 said: well how about SPRING  | |
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Vendetta1 said: ZombieKitten said: well how about SPRING  | |
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Cinnie said: sextonseven said: Great movie. When was that movie in theatres?? 2006 | |
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ZombieKitten said: thinks we are going to get it on if we meet up
I just want to see what he's up to, talk, since we used to have a great time talking! (cause I am a ninja bitch and have a guy harem for intellectual purposes) But I really think he wants to  he thinks it will be a hook-up!
BUT he also used that word "mate" which usually is how the aussie male differentiates you from a potential bonking partner, except this guy is from Arizona and probably doesn't realise that
I think it means we can't just have a coffee, worst luck. nothing good can come from meeting with this guy. Have you spoken to your hubby about your feelings on this?....if not, why?...point being you can't recreate the past, you're a different person than you were back then, and you need not try to rekindle this friendship. Just let it be a happy memory. | |
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BlackAdder7 said: ZombieKitten said: thinks we are going to get it on if we meet up
I just want to see what he's up to, talk, since we used to have a great time talking! (cause I am a ninja bitch and have a guy harem for intellectual purposes) But I really think he wants to he thinks it will be a hook-up!
BUT he also used that word "mate" which usually is how the aussie male differentiates you from a potential bonking partner, except this guy is from Arizona and probably doesn't realise that
I think it means we can't just have a coffee, worst luck. nothing good can come from meeting with this guy. Have you spoken to your hubby about your feelings on this?....if not, why?...point being you can't recreate the past, you're a different person than you were back then, and you need not try to rekindle this friendship. Just let it be a happy memory. already concluded | |
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ZombieKitten said: thinks we are going to get it on if we meet up
I just want to see what he's up to, talk, since we used to have a great time talking! (cause I am a ninja bitch and have a guy harem for intellectual purposes) But I really think he wants to he thinks it will be a hook-up!
BUT he also used that word "mate" which usually is how the aussie male differentiates you from a potential bonking partner, except this guy is from Arizona and probably doesn't realise that
I think it means we can't just have a coffee, worst luck. I'd assume the same if we were meeting up for a "coffee"!  [Edited 3/16/09 18:28pm] | |
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Amaxx said: ZombieKitten said: thinks we are going to get it on if we meet up
I just want to see what he's up to, talk, since we used to have a great time talking! (cause I am a ninja bitch and have a guy harem for intellectual purposes) But I really think he wants to he thinks it will be a hook-up!
BUT he also used that word "mate" which usually is how the aussie male differentiates you from a potential bonking partner, except this guy is from Arizona and probably doesn't realise that
I think it means we can't just have a coffee, worst luck. I'd assume the same if we were meeting up for a "coffee"! do you see now why Kylie and I have actually not met up with you yet! | |
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ZombieKitten said: BlackAdder7 said: nothing good can come from meeting with this guy. Have you spoken to your hubby about your feelings on this?....if not, why?...point being you can't recreate the past, you're a different person than you were back then, and you need not try to rekindle this friendship. Just let it be a happy memory. already concluded So you did him?  | |
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JustErin said: ZombieKitten said: already concluded So you did him? what's the rush! | |
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ZombieKitten said: Amaxx said: I'd assume the same if we were meeting up for a "coffee"! do you see now why Kylie and I have actually not met up with you yet!  Yeah! Yeah! | |
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