$64,000 Question: To guarantee or not guarantee?
By JIM LITKE, AP Sports Columnist

On senior night for the Oklahoma women’s basketball team last week, star center Courtney Paris got caught up in the emotion of the moment and said if the Sooners don’t win the NCAA tournament in her final season, she’s going to repay every penny of her four-year scholarship.

Given the chance to back off, she repeated it.

“I want to do something special,” Paris told The Oklahoman, when the newspaper caught up with her soon after. “That’s why I put my scholarship on the table. I meant what I said.”

That’s $64,000, give or take a few textbooks. And she’s repeated it several times since.

As someone who just finished paying four years of out-of-state tuition for the second time at a Big Ten school, I was going to offer some advice: Stop. You’re making your parents nuts.

Apparently not.

Courtney’s father, former 49ers Pro Bowl lineman Bubba Paris, turned up during halftime on Tuesday night’s telecast of the Big East women’s final between Louisville and Connecticut and added his baritone voice to hers.

Keep in mind how many hours of carpooling he invested in Courtney’s scholarship, as well as the one given to twin daughter Ashley, who also plays for Oklahoma. While no one explicitly promised to repay her scholarship, you see how this could get expensive in a hurry.

No matter.

“This is their year,” Bubba Paris said. “And let me be clear about this again: My daughters have contributed. They’ve helped them recruit great players. They brought in good people.”

Then he got much closer to the camera. And louder—all in good fun. I think.

“If they don’t win this year, it’s your fault Sherri Coale,” he thundered at his daughter’s coach. “Take those great players and win with them. I said it. Yes I did!”

(After that performance, would you be surprised to learn he launched a second career as a motivational speaker and sideline reporter? That he’s an ordained minister? That Bubba played for Bo Schembechler at Michigan and won three Super Bowls with San Francisco? Thought so.)

Courtney’s guarantee shouldn’t rank alongside Joe Namath telling reporters the upstart New York Jets would win the Super Bowl on the eve of the big game. It’s not Mark Messier, with the Rangers down 3-2 heading into Game 6, promising New York a Stanley Cup. Nor is it Babe Ruth calling his shot in the ’32 World Series against the Cubs.

It’s better.

Because it’s attached to real cash.

This isn’t forget and forgive—the rest of the debt. This is “Just Win, Baby! … Or else.”

Imagine next week’s headlines if it caught on.

“Owner Donald Sterling forced to return Clippers to NBA league office. Concedes ‘respectability’ will remain a ‘pipe dream … so long as I’m in charge.”’

“David Beckham decides making soccer big in U.S. ‘was more work and less fun than Posh promised.’ Returns Posh, pair of game-worn cleats and autographed jersey to Galaxy to satisfy ‘clawback’ provision in $250 million deal.”

“Fired Lions general manager Matt Millen agrees to shag punts at practice until teams wins a Super Bowl. ‘It’s the least I can do to undo the damage I’ve done.”’

Remember that ugly scene during Connecticut men’s coach Jim Calhoun’s news conference a few weeks ago, the one where an activist sneaked in and asked Calhoun to justify getting paid $1.6 million by a state staring at an $8 billion deficit two years from now?

That could be every day in the new world of sports! Holding people accountable might even be fun—for a while.

“Here’s the deal,” UConn women’s coach Geno Auriemma said, deciding to play along after his team clobbered Louisville to win its second straight conference regular-season title.

“If we recruit you and our goal is to make the NCAA tournament, and we don’t, you owe one year of your scholarship back. If we recruit you because we have a chance to win the national championship and we don’t, then you have to give some money back. I think I would be in favor of that.

“Now, the only problem,” Auriemma concluded “is my AD will come to me and say, ‘You give back a year every time you don’t do what I want you to do.”’

That might be the strangest thing about Paris’ guarantee. Even casual fans of women’s basketball, let alone the administration at Connecticut and the rest of the state, would be stunned if Auriemma doesn’t win a sixth national title this year.

They might even ask for some money back.

The Huskies are 33-0, they’re beating opponents by an average of 31 points and nobody has come closer than 10. They beat Louisville 93-65 in January and 75-36 Tuesday night. They beat Oklahoma 106-78 back in November even though Courtney Paris, who is a double-double machine, put up 14 points and the same number of rebounds.

If the two teams meet again in the tournament—a much bigger “if” for the Sooners than Huskies—Paris could ring up a triple-triple and still come up short. And even if she goes on to play in the WNBA, where salaries top out around $100,000, paying Oklahoma back won’t be easy.

If nothing else, as motivational tricks go, this one is not cheap.

So here’s some advice for Courtney that might be more useful:

You go, girl.

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