http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/

1. you’re “dating”, and she makes any reference whatsoever to anybody else she might be seeing.

even if it’s “unintentional” (which it never is), most women aren’t going to let a guy she’s interested in know that she’s seeing other people, for fear that it might scare him away. she might imply that she’s “busy”, but if she’s into a cat, it stays the ambiguous “busy” instead of the ball-shrinkingly unambiguous “damn…do you realize this is my second date this week?? you’re lucky you caught me“.

2. you all havent been physical before, but she makes any reference whatsoever to sex she’s had before

basically, if you’re sitting around shooting the sh*t and she’s telling you about “that time a couple years ago in the movie theater, with the bus driver, the basketball trophy, and the stopwatch“, consider yourself neutered. her “freeness” of the tongue if proof that she now officially looks at you as a “friend“, not a “potential sex partner“. the next time you see her, you might as well just leave you balls in your glove compartment. if you’re not going to use them, they should at least be somewhere safe

3. you go over her crib to “chill” or watch a flick, and she looks as if she just completed a decathlon.

if you haven’t slept with a woman yet, and she allows you to see her at her hair-curlered, scuffed timberlanded, dirty-t-shirted weekend worst, the chances of her ever seeing you in a sexual manner is about the same as the likelihood that ann coulter’s adams apple isn’t bigger than her balls.

as neurotic about their appearance as most women are, (unless she’s still in college) there’s no way in hell she’s gonna allow a guy she’s actually interested to see her at her “worst” before they actually sleep together.

4. any compliment about her looks or her potential as a mate is responded to with the same lazy “thanks” you’d get after loaning a co-worker a broken pencil

to expound:

guy complimenting “interested” woman: “you’re killing that dress tonight”

interested reply, accompanied with eye contact, a smile, a slight blush, and a undetectable tingle of the vagina: “thanks”

guy complimenting “uninterested” woman: “you’re killing that dress tonight“

uninterested reply, accompanied with a forced and somewhat condescending return compliment, to ease the awkwardness she’s feeling: “awwww, thanks hun. your socks are really nice too. they really compliment your knuckles”

5. she either refers to you by one of the killer b’s (”buddy” or “brother“) or uses this phrase (”he’s like a **fill in the blank** to me“) at any time when describing you.

just the thought of hearing this from a woman i’m interested in gives me cold sweats and hot flashes. i think i’m just gonna move on

lastly…

6. she tells you she’s not interested in or ready to be in a relationship…

…which is her polite way of saying she’s not interested in or ready to be in a relationship, with YOU...and she probably never will be. if a woman actually says these words to you, believe her. its the realest thing she’ll ever say


there you have it. six surefire signs. don’t get shakiraed.

—the champ

I can agree with all that right thurr.

bboy87 said:

what?

dude.. here it is.. women had 2 ladders .. this is a fact...

http://www.ladderwiki.com...the_Ladder


http://www.ladderwiki.com...dex.php/IW <-- read all em' right there of those abbreviations (IP,IW,NB etc) ... dude.. that is TRUTH!

"A woman's test is material. A man's test is a woman...if a man could fuck in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house." - Rabbi Dave Chappelle

An Intellectual Pimp is a woman who keeps one or more intellectual whores for her mental entertainment.

An Intellectual Whore is a man who a woman keeps around for intellectual purposes. She is uninterested in him sexually and considers him a friend. He probably wants to sleep with her, so he pretends to be her friend in the hope of one day getting sex.
[Edited 1/15/09 19:49pm]

purplekitty said:

... SCNDLS when I saw that.. I wanted to email these people.. and tell them 'hey! TMI ... hey stop revealing secrets!!!! '

Flowers2 said:

Girl, this shit is HILARIOUS!!! I love how they keep referring to folks as "rabbi"

"...because every guy you met since you was 16 has been trying to fuck you. Every time a man's being nice to you that's all he's doing is offering dick." --Rabbi Chris Rock

purplekitty said:

The Abyss ... scenario 2 that they put had me laughing so hard..


Scenario 2: Tom meets Jane. She's cute and seems smart. After an appropriate amount of time he asks her out on a date. She acccepts and they have what seems to be a perfectly nice date. Tom thinks he has a chance with Jane. He asks her out again. She says no, either explicitly or by never returning his phone call. Tom has no idea what the Hell just happened. Jane starts fucking an unemployed alcoholic.


Ladder Theory Explanation: Jane misrepresented which ladder Tom was on. He thought he was on the good ladder because of her acceptance of the date. Mistake. This led to an unintentional ladder jump. He was kicked into the Abyss. In this situation, Jane often wants to stay friends because you are so interesting and funny or some shit like that. If this happens you are most likely an Intellectual Whore. I'm sorry. This is most likely to be a ninja-bitch.

A Few Common Types of Intellectual Pimps To Look Out For
There are undoubtedly more archetypes than these, but here are a few of the major ones to look for.

1. The Hot Woman: This is a woman who knows that she is attractive and that guys want to fuck her. She probably has a boyfriend or a stable of steady Outlaw Biker fucks. You were probably trying to fuck her and got tossed onto the friend ladder.
Advantages as Intellectual Pimp: Hot women have busy social lives. Because of this, they are usually not very demanding on an intellectual whore's time. Also, it looks good to be seen with them. Try to get a picture of you with your hot Pimp and then tell other women that was your fiancee who died.

Disadvantages: Because they are used to having their ass kissed, when they do require your time, they are generally more demanding. You'd think they would have hot friends you could go after, but hot women of course see all other hot women as threats and often as not will put you off-limits to their hot friends. Also, if you don't rank highly on her ladder, what makes you think that you'll be high up on the ladder of her hot friends? This usually leads to being around hot women that you still can't fuck.

Ladder Jumping Prospects: Make sure to get your last rites administered before you attempt this ladder jump.

2. The Ugly Friend: This is a woman that we should all empathize with on some level. This is the woman who has a hot friend. She herself is not hot. This usually leads to guys talking to her so they can try to fuck her friend. Eventually she learns that she can get attention from guys by putting out, since she'll never otherwise get attention when with her hot friend. Of course some guys won't fuck her still because they think it will jeopardize their chances with the hot friend.
Advantages: Not being hot, they are easier to say 'no' to. Also you don't feel so bad about not fucking because you probably don't want to very much anyway. You can try to fuck the hot friend to amuse yourself.

Disadvantages: Even when you don't want to fuck someone, you still want them to want to fuck you. Many men can't handle the ego blow of a girl they don't find attractive not wanting to fuck them.

Ladder Jumping Prospects: Say 5 Hail Mary's and 4 Our-Fathers before attempting this jump.

3. The Innocent: This is a woman who has led a sheltered life, watched too many Sandra Bullock movies, or is just an idealistic soul who refuses to see what is right in front of her.
Advantages: She'll generally not suspect any nefarious activity from you, and thus is less guarded around you. Since you're such good friends you can initiate a lot of physical contact with her before she gets uncomfortable.

Disadvantages: If she has a boyfriend she's probably actually loyal to him, believing in romantic principles as she does. She probably won't be able to tell you anything useful about how to get a woman off, or will be unwilling to discuss it.

Ladder Jumping Prospects: If she is in a relationship have the last rites administered first. If not, and you sound sincere, say 5 Acts of Contrition, 4 Hail-Mary's and 7 Our-Fathers. If you don't sound convincing, say 10 Hail Mary's and 50 Our Fathers.

hilarious... we gotta switch up the whole game now lol .. they done warned everybody

If you look you'll see that below the ladder is the Abyss (what was it Nietzsche said about a man being on a rope stretched over an Abyss?.... well it's worse than he thought; there is no rope.) So the man falls into the Abyss

I feel bad for guys who keep finding themselves in the 'friend zone'! I know the feeling...I live there

thekidsgirl said:

girl!.. you know you're an IP.. admit it! lol

thekidsgirl said:

I'm sure I'm doing that to a guy who started talking to me

Sans the vagina tingle, of course
.
[Edited 1/15/09 20:54pm]

purplekitty said:

What about the guy who has a female as his best friend and ONLY as a best friend?

In high school, 3 of my best friends were girls. Matter of fact they still are

2 of them have kids and they call me "Uncle Jay"

bboy87 said:

that's different.. you guys are great friends, so no attraction between/amongst you guys..... the whole IW/IP thing is when one wants more than friendship

Flowers2 said:

I've had friends who have gone through that

A friend of mine would take this girl out and buy her shit....but she wasn't interested in him

i'm really skurred of that.

who would put that much thought into all the levels of friendship a guy ar girl can have during an "era" that would call for a pretty pissed off guy or girl in my book.


i dont think any guy wants to have an array of women to screw. i could be wrong. maybe its late and i'm sleepy or sumthing.

bboy87 said:

that's messed up.. knowing that the guy likes her and she takes advantage of him is triflin' ..

yep.




...hahahahhaahahah

bboy87 said:

I had a dude best friend in high school too and we never dated. We're STILL friends. But if I keep it 100, we coulda prolly hooked up if given the chance and right circumstances. So with any of your friends, would you smash if she walked into a room naked and propositioned you??? That's the true test.

SCNDLS said:

If I was as of yet unmarried, HELL YEAH!!! Friend Zones SUCK ASS, especially when she's telling you all the details of her latest bedroom exploits...then asks you with a straight face if you think its a good idea to "broaden" her horizons by letting cock du jour enter her rear point of entry (and NOT in those words!)...but if she were to walk in and yell HIT IT...I woulda been in there like swimwear, and wouldn't have thought nothing of it....

...or as the Special Forces say..."shoot first, ask questions later!"

SCNDLS said:

maybe only one, and I would have to be really horny


like REALLY horny

bboy87 said:

Nahh you would just laugh at her!

That's what I love about being gay. Even if we're in "friend" zone, we can STILL get sex!

"Ninja Bitch"
That is a BRAND new one! This shit looks like some Katt Williams stand up.

bboy87 said:

Okay, then they are difinitely in the not "attractive" to you category.

SCNDLS said:

There are some lines.....not meant 2 be crossed.