Some time ago I stopped straightening my hair and now I wear it curly the majority of the time. It's grown quite long, and imo, quite beautiful. I get lots of compliments on it, which is awesome. I mean, I'll take a compliment when I can get one.


Well...here's my problem: Whenever I go out and I wear my hair down drunk girls feel compelled to rub their faces in my hair. WTF?!?!?!? Sometimes they're not even drunk! In what universe is this a normal thing to do?

So my question to you is this, org: What do I say to these people to get them to stop rubbing their faces in my hair without hurting anyone's feelings or creating a socially awkaward situation?

are they hot or ugly drunk girls??

I think you need a t-shirt that says:

"nobody, I repeat NOBODY touches the hair"

or something to that effect. How rude!
I would at least ask you first before doing it

JerseyKRS said:

They're obnoxious once they rub their faces in my hair.

JasmineFire said:

put cayenne pepper in your hair.

ZombieKitten said:

that might work.

Usually, if they do ask, it's once their face is already in my hair. So it sounds like "OOOOOHHHHH can mphsh mphsh mmm hmmm HAIR!"

JerseyKRS said:

that might hurt me more than it hurts them!

JasmineFire said:

I promise I will wait for an answer

JerseyKRS said:

that's brilliant!!!! or wash it with gasoline like clem churchill

Ummmm, they're invading your personal space and you're concerned about being polite and not hurting anyone's feelings???

Chile, please.

ZombieKitten said:

you have no idea how much that means to me.

sometimes, it's ok to knock the shit outta somebody

Black Woman’s Hair Touched One Too Many Times

(NEW YORK) Venitra Davies, an African American attorney at Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe, was escorted from her office building Monday after assaulting the firm’s new white office manager.

According to New York City police office Tony De La Cruz, witnesses saw the two in the kitchen Monday making their morning coffee. “Then out of nowhere, Davies let out something like war cry before punching out the victim,” said De La Cruz.

“I have no idea why she was so upset,” Abby Spitz, the target of Davies’ aggression, told De La Cruz after regaining consciousness. “All I did was say ‘Good Morning’ and then complimented her on her hair.”

Davies told The Peoples News it was Spitz’s next comment and actions that pushed her over the edge.

“Abby looked at me and said ‘Oh my gosh. Your hair is so curly. How’d you do that? Is it real?,’” said Davies, who had spent all day Saturday at the salon. “She then proceeded to raise her hand in the direction of my head.”

That’s when the normally prim and professional Davies snapped and cold clocked her co-worker.

Spitz, who had just started at the firm the week prior, had not been privy to the protocol around Davies’ hair.

On an almost weekly basis Davies’ hairstyle can go from a sleek, short pageboy, to long and luscious, to an electrifying natural fro. Her white co-workers, who struggle to grow out bangs or end up looking like poodles after failed attempts at perms, don’t understand how Davies can pull off her quick changes.

In fact, Spitz was not the first employee at the firm to have a too-close-for-comfort reaction to Davies’ varying styles. Cassidy Wankman, a senior partner, holds that honor.

During an off-site retreat in 2003, Wankman absently ran his fingers through Davies’ hair when she was trying out the long sleek signature hairstyle of Naomi Campbell.

“It looked so shiny I just had to touch it,” he said. “Venitra shot me a look and told me to never touch her hair. I knew she meant business.”

But Wankman’s actions opened the door for other colleagues to satisfy their curiosity about Davies’ mane by reaching out and touching it.

“I’ve asked them a thousand times, please don’t touch my hair,” says Davies, 37, who last year put a sign on her desk reading ‘Don’t Touch My Hair.’ “Abby caught me on the wrong day.”

De La Cruz says one of the leading causes of office assaults is white people touching black women’s hair.

“When black women get their hair done, it’s best to just say it looks nice and move on,” he says.

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News.

SCNDLS said:

I just want us all to get along!

I mean, I understand their "curiousity" to a certain extent and I'd rather they ask me about it then just assume it's fake (which this one bitch did...she just yelled out "i always thought it was fake!"). But this face rubbing thing is really gross.

JasmineFire said:

and I will let you put your face in my hair too if you want, not that I could think of a good reason for that, but you know, to reciprocate

SCNDLS said:

I'm afraid that's going to happen with me.
I really hate it when people put their faces in my hair like that.

"Watch out for the lice!"

JasmineFire said:

Ain't nuthin' wrong with getting along but when people, strangers especially, invade your physical space, damn trynta get along IMO. You don't have to be rude, but hell they already breached rude so what the hell, cuss they ass out???

superspaceboy said:

YES!

ZombieKitten said:

I have no idea why anyone in the world would want to rub their face in anyone else's hair for any reason at all. I mean, seriously, why would anyone want to do that?

SCNDLS said:

these are usually people i know from school and what not. So i know them but i don't know them, you know? And i don't care how well i know someone, it's still not a good thing to do.

JasmineFire said:

omg that reminds me of an awful thing we used to do as kids

we'd say to some unsuspecting friend "come here I want to tell you a secret" and they'd come right up close, we'd make them get so close our heads were touching, then we'd whisper "I've got nits"

ZombieKitten said:

kids can be such jerks.

JasmineFire said:

Since I have only seen your crowning glory in photographs, I can only speculate that there may be some kind of irrisitable face-rubbing compulsion your hair inspires in total strangers. It may indeed prove very difficult NOT to rub one's face in your hair!

ZombieKitten said:

if people had any idea how much leave in condition i put in my hair, they would back their faces up.

JasmineFire said:

what do you mean?

ZombieKitten said:

Wtf? That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard about hair.

JustErin said:

it's starting to become my life.

i think that i'll experience less of this when i go back home. people there are used to curly hair.

JasmineFire said:

You really want my opinion? I'd tell them to get the hell off my hair.

That is the strangest thing I've ever heard. I would NOT worry about hurting anyone's feelings or creating an awkward social situation. They are the ones creating the awkward situation.