Flowers2 said:

I'll bring some containers to take shit home

ThreadBare said:

CalhounSq said:

Okay but I think I need to repost the Thanksgiving dinner rules that will apply. CSq please pay spayshul attenzione to rules 6 and 10.

IF you can follow these 10 RULES FOR THANKSGIVING DINNER AT MY HOUSE

1. Don't get in line asking questions about the food. "Who made the potato salad? Is there egg in it? Are the greens fresh? Is the meat in the greens turkey or pork? Who made the macaroni and cheese? What kind of pie is that? Who made it? Ask one more question and I will punch you in your mouth, knocking out all your fronts so you will not be able to eat anything.

2. If you can't walk or are missing any limbs, sit your ass down until someone makes your plate for you. Dinner time is not the time for you to be independent. Nibble on them damn pecans and walnuts to hold you over until someone makes you a plate.

3. If you have kids under the age of twelve, I will escort their little asses to the basement and bring their food down to them. They are not going to tear my damn house up this year. Tell them that they are not allowed upstairs until it's time for Uncle Junior to start telling family stories about their mommas and papas. If they come upstairs for any reason except for that they are bleeding to death, I will break a foot off in their asses!

4. There is going to be one prayer for Thanksgiving dinner! JUST ONE! We do not care that you are thankful that your 13 year old daughter gave birth to a healthy baby or your nephew just got out of jail. Save that talk for somebody who gives a damn. The time limit for the prayer is one minute. If you are still talking after that one minute is up, you will feel something hard come across your lips and they will be swollen for approximately 20 minutes.

5. Finish everything on your plate before you go up for seconds! If you don't, you will be cursed out and asked to stay your greedy ass home next year!

6. BRING YOUR OWN TUPPERWARE!! Don't let me catch you fixing yourself a plate in my good Tupperware knowing damn well that I will never see it again! Furthermore, if you didn't bring anything over, don't let me catch you making a plate period or it will be a misunderstanding.

7. What you came with is what you should leave with!! Do not leave my house with anything that doesn't belong to you. EVERYBODY WILL BE SUBJECTED TO A BODY SEARCH COMING AND GOING OUT OF MY DOMAIN!!!

8. Do not leave your kids so you can go hopping from house to house. This is not a DAYCARE CENTER ! There will be a kid-parent roll call every ten minutes. Any parent that is not present at the time of roll call, your child will be put outside until you come and get him or her. After 24 hours, I will call DHS on your ignorant ass!!

9. BOOK YOUR HOTEL ROOM BEFORE YOU COME INTO TOWN!! There will be no sleeping over at my house! You are to come and eat dinner and take your ass home or to your hotel room. EVERYBODY GETS KICK THE HELL OUT AT 11:00 pm. You will get a 15 minute warning bell ring.

10. Last but not least! ONE PLATE PER PERSON!! This is not a soup kitchen. I am not trying to feed your family until Christmas dinner! You will be supervised when you fix your plate. Anything over the appropriate amount will be charged to you before you leave. There will be a cash register at the door. Thanks to Cousin Alfred and his greedy ass family, we now have a credit card machine! So VISA and MASTERCARD are now being accepted. NO FOOD STAMPS OR ACCESS CARDS YET!

SCNDLS said:

DAMN, I guess I can only bring ONE of my extra big plastic containers instead of all 3 YOU MEAN!

CalhounSq said:

CalhounSq said:

lol .. I'm doing the same lol..

SCNDLS said:

You'd better add something about not rummaging through your underwear drawer. That way MuthaFunka won't be able to get away with it.

Adisa lol ..

Adisa said:

Naw, that's allowed.

SCNDLS said:

NASTY!

Adisa said:

Everywhere except the kitchen.

The most fun you can have (outside of sex) is cook with your man. Cooking together is fun, it shows you if he knows how to listen. Comprehension skills are important in a marriage.

"Nucca I said one TEASPOON! What cha doing?! That's it! Get out the kitchen!"

But if you two cook well together then its a good sign of things to come.

paintedlady said:

I can't do it, though. It reminds me of when my mom used to try to teach how to cook but she'd get frustrated and push me out the way, "Damn, I'll do it!" But I learned a lot from watching her crazy ass.

SCNDLS said:

My mom did the same to me!

Now she's likes to take credit for all my culinary talents.

She can't even cook steamed dumplings.

SCNDLS said:

Oh my dick! Marry me! (Oops, that slipped LOL!)

CalhounSq said:

Flowers2 said:

What kind? German chocolate cheesecake or yo ass ain't gettin' in!

CalhounSq said:

I'm gonna be throwin' some 'bows to take shit home!

paintedlady said:

Now, my mama can burn. She's good for making the shit outta the monthly recipes in Ebony and putting a Panamanian twist on that shit. She ain't no punk in the kitchen.

Adisa said:

(Damn! How you know?!?!?!)

SCNDLS said:

- And I need to cop at least ONE PAIR WORN!

SCNDLS said:

You sure? Cuz I bring a whole new meaning to "Stovetop Stuffing"!

MuthaFunka said:

oh, I'll make that.. I make Strawberry, plain, Chocolate, Chocolate Chip, even a sugarless one... I can do it

Flowers2 said:

Good. Bring 'em ALL!

SCNDLS said:

My mom's can cook too but she didn't teach me... I sorta feel like I had to figure it out myself since she never measures anything and calls every ingredient "this" or "that" .

MuthaFunka said:

have mercy .. lol ..

MuthaFunka said:

MuthaFunka said:

So when is this cook off happening? *looks at calendar*