to get their way?

Cuz they can. And people let them.

Power is quite a mind trip. It's WONDERFUL if it works as well.

People use another simply because the other allows it

again - it's easier often for some to say "she used me " instead of owning that they are accountable for giving away their power and allowing themselves to BE used

That's how things go. You use this website to ask your questions, no?
So it's safe to say that you're a user too.

It's a personality disorder. They don't even realize it that they are doing it.

HamsterHuey said:

The more I look at these 'user' type relationships, it does seem to be about power and control.

The user lost control somewhere in their life and tends to want to control things so that they can keep their illusion of 'power'.

But I think it's more detrimental to them in the end when they can't trust others enough to allow them to flourish on their own,

there will not be trust and and openness from the other party enough to carry on a relationship/partnership with them.

Mach said:

I agree with your comment.

The type of situation I have in mind is that I see someone using others to try to try to hurt me and make me jealous.

But looking at this person and their attempt to get back at me to hurt me, I feel sorry for them because they don't realize that they are not just hurting me,

but they are also damaging the relationship and what could be a beautiful thing and they are also hurting themselves.

Thing is, although it hurts me, it doesn't make me jealous and feel a degree of empathy for this person,

I won't allow them to take my power, I just feel for them and wish I could make the deep-seated distrust disappear.

ArielB said:

Thus the term 'username'.

gyro34 said:

How do you think that one can help them to realize it, or will they even finally come to realize it one day?

Maybe it's more of rhetorical question.

LadyyCabdriver said:

Nobody can help them realize what they are doing. One cannot make people change. Only if something really terrible happens to them. Then, they will seriously start making changes. It is also possible that they may never come to realize it.

Mach said:

Exactly, you just hit the nail right on the head.

Business organisations are built on the concept of using people.

Electrostar said:

Not all of them dude

mdiver said:

I suppose it depends on the size of the organisation.

Electrostar said:

No, it depends on the owners. Love to you all bro
[Edited 12/28/08 11:29am]

I think when people say that a person allows a person to use them, it's put all the blame on the one person. Users set out to use. The person being used is usually not aware of it until it is over and has a chance to reflect. People use other people because they are assholes, plain and simple.

mdiver said:

I like your sig line,

LadyyCabdriver said:[quote]

mdiver said:

Truth for this place and time

mdiver said:

Perfect summation.

Because it's fun.