at the height of your love for them?

I have a friend who is crazy about her boyfriend. At first she passed him off to me as her 'friend'

But anyways, they've only been dating for a few months, and as far as I knew didn't have any issues.

But she told me just now that she's going to break up with him.
I asked her why, and she was very vague, but it boils down to
basically a trust vs. where you want to go in life type of thing.
She was careful to say that she's "crazy about him" but that
it just wasn't right.

I would think that if you're really 'crazy' about somebody
you'll try to make it right, since she gave me no issues or
reasons that weren't solvable through a few small changes.

So, I guess I'm not sure I believe that she is
crazy about him. Is it possible to be at the height of your
adoration for somebody but call it quits without
what appears to me to be too much emotional trauma?

I mean, this girl is going to the Spa Monday morning like
nothing took place!

I can't imagine breaking up with someone if I was truly crazy about them. That would suck.

FunkMistress said:

If you're truly crazy about them, you try to make it work.

NO


Yeah ... no


makes zero sense to me

Oh, and the passing off as a friend thing, she CLEARLY doesn't care for the person. At least not enough.

CarrieMpls said:

Well, a long time ago we were 'friends with benefits', so I was inclined to believe her. But I know here pretty well, and got a sense that she really liked him after a while.

In the beginning she passed him off as a friend, and I sensed something more was happening. I'm not sure if shortly thereafter something sexual took place (she admitted they were an item about a month after I first met him), so there is the possibility that they were just friends when I first met him. (I don't think so, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt).

But recently, they were talking about going to the keys together, etc. etc. and it seemed almost like they were friggen married.
Then BAM! This came out of left field.

I'm not friends with him so I doubt I'll get his point of view when the dust settles.

I personally , if I'm crazy about somebody, will try to make it work.
Only if the odds seem impossible would I call it quits.

Imago said:

ahhhhh... yeah, that makes sense. My first boyfriend and I spent months convincing everyone we were just friends (and we were) that when we finally weren't it was kinda funny.

But yes, I agree with you. No one breaks up with someone they care that much about unless it truly is impossible in some way to make it work. Although you mentioned something about goals... sometimes life goals can be so far off it can't work. Things like having kids, or getting married, stuff like that.

She just wasn't THAT into him, obviouslly. Get the book, Dan. Jeez. All these threads.

HamsterHuey said:

It's true.

And get rid off that mutated Spiderman avatar!

HamsterHuey said:

Imago said:

And stop posting emoticon-only posts! Waste of space!

And hey! The blue horny man! That one I like.

And do something about your signature! I have told you enough times! No BOLD, at least you did not center it, like it's worthy of posting, or something. One line should do.

MAKE IT SO!

I'm serious!

Yeah, I had it happen. Fairly recently, in fact. I don't know if I'd say I was truly in love with her, but I definitely had strong feelings for her. And she took a job in another city because I wouldn't make the type of commitment she wanted. It was awful for awhile, but we're still friends and she's been back here several times as I've also made a couple of trips to see her. We talk almost everyday. But it's not the same. Nowhere close.

people who act like that are lying cunts in my experience.

you have a crush on her somebody and you feel bad for him, don't YOU!!!!

Imago said:

Heehee!!

*signature* You're so sweet Dan. Now hurry up and get married so I could be the ring girl....er....um.....butch man.

yes, I have...it was during a really shitty time in my life when drugs consumed me...she was the only person that had any sort of positve influence on me and I truly believe she would have stood by me at any cost...even as strung out as I was, I realized that I would only hurt her, so I let her go...

Yes. it wasnt going anywhere.I prefer to not waste time or years on someone who can't get it together.

No..
But I can understand it.....they may not be good for us even if we are crazy about them...or it may just not have a future so why put urself through the pain