Mods, I really want this thread to not be about theology, nor do I want to disucuss the dicotomy between Jan's millions in assets and corruption charges as opposed to what shes asking the poor to donate--they're grocery money



No.


This thread is about three things only:

1) Her hair and makeup

2) Her voice

3) The fact that she seems a little bit insane.



People, please try not to spawn any real debate on this thread--it would just be wasted words.

i have her hour-long nervous breakdown (okay, "testimony") on videotape. it's stunning. unfortunately, she recorded it before she had her mega-makeover. she used to look like strawberry shortcake with pink hair before she got the surgery and the new wigs. now she looks like loni anderson crossed with meka-godzilla.

She broadcasts from the next city over from where I live. She's a legend here

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[Edited 11/7/08 15:46pm]

Anxiety said:

What surgery?

she used to be a Bratz doll when she was younger...

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

the surgery that made her boobs bigger and her face less craggy.

Anxiety said:

whoa! don't be shy, tell us what you really think

XxAxX said:

i think that in comparison, jan crouch made tammy faye look like kelly mcginnis in "witness".

Anxiety said:

Imagine they did a porn together

and her husband is looking pretty aged and dumpy--he used to look old and skinny...

I saw a video where she gave a barbie to a third world child with no arms..and the kid (a boy) just looked at her pink hair like "AAACHHCCK!"

Anxiety said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Right by South Coast Plaza I saw her shopping in a Target shopping center, she looks orange in person

veronikka said:

oh my god, i'd totally run screaming out of that store. i'd have a flashback to last weekend when i was chased through a haunted house by a zombie clown.

I parked this bitches beemer years ago on Easter sunday when I was a valet. This Tammy Fay wanna be didn't even tip me. Cunt!

PEJ said:

z

O

M

F

G



that bitch

PEJ said:

don't hate! pink hair dye and black scoop neck blouses ain't cheap!

This has got to be one of the weirdest things I've seen in a long long long long time




If there really is a lord up in heaven, he's looking down at this and thinking

Imago said:

is that you on the keys?

why did they pull her skin down into her neck?????

i was bored as hell last night, so i was channel-surfing and i ended up tuning in to TBN and watching it on mute and being all mst3k with it. it's weird--all the other normal channels i can barely get a good reception on, but yet all of the religious channels come in just fine. wtf?!

they had some fundraiser thing on, and the first things i thought: 1) "dude, where's jan crouch? is she still on here? what's she look like, she still wearing 100 lbs. of mascara?" and, when i spotted her in the background onstage, 2) "wait *squints eyes*...is her hair pink??? she looks like a cross between a low-rent tammy faye and jem as a 50 year-old cat lady!"

BSK3478 said:

horatio said:

BSK3478 said:

Imago said:

i was expecting the woman to beam outta the studio by touching one of her earrings..."show's over, synergy!"

[offtopic] and yeah, the fact that they got people asking old folks for their grocery/rent/SSI check money "for the lord" pisses me off too. that's why i watch it on mute, otherwise i'd be yelling at the teevee all night. [/offtopic]

BSK3478 said:

I could never donate to them. It'd feel like donating my grocery money to an ewok with a pink wig on. Of course if my donations would buy her a permanent flight to the forest moon of Endor, I'd consider it

Anxiety said:

can you imagine a godzilla-type battle between her and that little ol' nun from EWTN (that woman's been on there forever, i remember seeing her when i was a kid)?

Imago said:

i'm waiting for the day where they just have a fundraiser that's dedicated to getting enough money for jan so maybelline can create the world's largest diamond-encrusted bottle of mascara and a gold-plated gigantic eyeliner pencil for her.

I wanna take a nap on her hair.

violator said:

i dunno if there's enough room in her hair. her stylists probably take residence in it.

violator said: