New topic
PrintableMuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: Okay I'm confused like a muthafucka because most of your comments seem like you're speaking in generalities, yet above you say you're speaking from your own experiences, then in another post you said "I never said I didn't want to commit, I NEVER brought THAT shit up, so I have NO IDEA where YOU'RE getting THAT shit from. " So for clarification, are you saying that you, personally, would enter into a committed relationship with the expectation that you would cheat and since monogamy is an unnatural state for men AND women, you'd be okay with, or at least accept, if your woman cheated as well??? Wouldn't all the lying and cheating be unnecessary if you just found someone with the same philosophy??? All this lying and cheating just seems like an open invitation for drama so why even bother? [Edited 10/22/08 16:30pm] Ok, let me clarify things then: When I said I was ONLY speaking from my experiences, this also included forums where men and women have gotten together to discuss these exact issues, as well as my own experiences in relationships. Now, I've said earlier that one of the reasons MOST MEN DON'T CHEAT is out of sheer respect for their woman. Now, please, for those that want to ONLY read what they wanna read, this does not mean that that is the ONLY reason MOST MEN don't cheat, that's just ONE REASON why most men don't cheat. As for ME - If I chose not to cheat it would be a combo of these reasons: 1 - Out of respect for my chick 2 - Because keeping up with the lies and deceit would be too much 3 - (If I loved her) Out of love But make NO MISTAKE about it. I'd WANT to fuck someone else. It's natural. Anyone - in a relationship - saying they don't see other people and get either aroused or wonder what it would be like fucking them is lying. Sorry, but that's my take on it, like it or not. And yeah, finding someone that is cool with you fucking other women would be great. But again, how many women like that do men run into in their everyday lives? Not that many. THAT'S a major reason why cheating happens. Plus, how many times have we ALL heard stories about women STARTING OUT as being cool with being a booty call but then their feelings get involved and they want EXCLUSIVITY? We've ALL heard THAT story. So again, it's hard to find someone like that and to where it remains JUST THAT. Clearer, but you still didn't answer my main question which is: are you saying that you, personally, would enter into a committed relationship with the expectation that you would cheat and since monogamy is an unnatural state for men AND women, you'd be okay with, or at least accept, if your woman cheated as well??? | |
- E-mail - orgNote -  Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: Ok, let me clarify things then: When I said I was ONLY speaking from my experiences, this also included forums where men and women have gotten together to discuss these exact issues, as well as my own experiences in relationships. Now, I've said earlier that one of the reasons MOST MEN DON'T CHEAT is out of sheer respect for their woman. Now, please, for those that want to ONLY read what they wanna read, this does not mean that that is the ONLY reason MOST MEN don't cheat, that's just ONE REASON why most men don't cheat. As for ME - If I chose not to cheat it would be a combo of these reasons: 1 - Out of respect for my chick 2 - Because keeping up with the lies and deceit would be too much 3 - (If I loved her) Out of love But make NO MISTAKE about it. I'd WANT to fuck someone else. It's natural. Anyone - in a relationship - saying they don't see other people and get either aroused or wonder what it would be like fucking them is lying. Sorry, but that's my take on it, like it or not. And yeah, finding someone that is cool with you fucking other women would be great. But again, how many women like that do men run into in their everyday lives? Not that many. THAT'S a major reason why cheating happens. Plus, how many times have we ALL heard stories about women STARTING OUT as being cool with being a booty call but then their feelings get involved and they want EXCLUSIVITY? We've ALL heard THAT story. So again, it's hard to find someone like that and to where it remains JUST THAT. Clearer, but you still didn't answer my main question which is: are you saying that you, personally, would enter into a committed relationship with the expectation that you would cheat and since monogamy is an unnatural state for men AND women, you'd be okay with, or at least accept, if your woman cheated as well??? No, I wouldn't enter a "committed relationship" that way but a "sexual relationship" would be ok to, of course, think that way. She, nor I, in a "sexual relationship" wouldn't be "cheating" because it's not a committed relationship. nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: Clearer, but you still didn't answer my main question which is: are you saying that you, personally, would enter into a committed relationship with the expectation that you would cheat and since monogamy is an unnatural state for men AND women, you'd be okay with, or at least accept, if your woman cheated as well??? No, I wouldn't enter a "committed relationship" that way but a "sexual relationship" would be ok to, of course, think that way. She, nor I, in a "sexual relationship" wouldn't be "cheating" because it's not a committed relationship. As I stated earlier, IMO, purely physical relationships are completely different and often more honest than "committed" relationships. That's why I wanted to make a clear distinction between the two cuz they're definitely apples and oranges. I think the ladies are riled up because they're thinking of men in "committed" relationships taking this view that it's easier to lie and cheat than to be upfront as opposed to those in "casual" ones. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: veronikka said: In other words, Im right!!! 
Actually, I was only stating what you had already said 
No, you're NOT right. In a previous post I already said that everyone deserves the truth, YOU just missed it!No, you must not have read my last line Rhythm floods my heart♥The melody it feeds my soul | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: No, I wouldn't enter a "committed relationship" that way but a "sexual relationship" would be ok to, of course, think that way. She, nor I, in a "sexual relationship" wouldn't be "cheating" because it's not a committed relationship. As I stated earlier, IMO, purely physical relationships are completely different and often more honest than "committed" relationships. That's why I wanted to make a clear distinction between the two cuz they're definitely apples and oranges. I think the ladies are riled up because they're thinking of men in "committed" relationships taking this view that it's easier to lie and cheat than to be upfront as opposed to those in "casual" ones. And they have every right to be upset when it's a committed relationship and he's cheating. My point was to show that most women can't handle the truth AFTER he's cheated, therefore, the man will pretty much always choose to lie and deceive to avoid a possible breakup, fight, hurting her with the truth, or (your favorite, SCNDLS) serious bodily harm .nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
veronikka said: MuthaFunka said: No, you're NOT right. In a previous post I already said that everyone deserves the truth, YOU just missed it!No, you must not have read my last line Oh. Yeah, I was completely oblivious to your last line. Typical male. nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: As I stated earlier, IMO, purely physical relationships are completely different and often more honest than "committed" relationships. That's why I wanted to make a clear distinction between the two cuz they're definitely apples and oranges. I think the ladies are riled up because they're thinking of men in "committed" relationships taking this view that it's easier to lie and cheat than to be upfront as opposed to those in "casual" ones. And they have every right to be upset when it's a committed relationship and he's cheating. My point was to show that most women can't handle the truth AFTER he's cheated, therefore, the man will pretty much always choose to lie and deceive to avoid a possible breakup, fight, hurting her with the truth, or (your favorite, SCNDLS) serious bodily harm . Yeah, I'ma fuck a nucca up BUT I'll tell him before it happens that I'm prone to fucking him up so it's not like it's a surprise and shit.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: And they have every right to be upset when it's a committed relationship and he's cheating. My point was to show that most women can't handle the truth AFTER he's cheated, therefore, the man will pretty much always choose to lie and deceive to avoid a possible breakup, fight, hurting her with the truth, or (your favorite, SCNDLS) serious bodily harm . Yeah, I'ma fuck a nucca up BUT I'll tell him before it happens that I'm prone to fucking him up so it's not like it's a surprise and shit.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
people cheat cuz they've got nothing better to do.
seriously. get a hobby.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Flowers2 said: Renegade... I said this in the other thread... if folks want to live in fantasy denial and not accept the truth.. then that's fine for them, that's they're choice.. but don't put that off on people LIKE ME ... 'Oh, I can't tell you, cause I KNOW you can't handle the truth'  all that says to me is.. you want to pacify your guilt and your ways by not telling, that's all it reads... I'm a realist and I'm not hearing that.. no, life is not pretty, the truth is ugly...and truth comes out anyway.. why can't a person just be an adult about it? Which is why I specifically stated in my post that if you PERSONALLY want to hear it, then good for you...I'm not putting ANYTHING off on you....this isn't about being in denial or living in a fantasy...and its rather dismissive of you to say so... there are people who, for whatever reason, would rather not know, regardless of what they might think is going on behind their back...it also depends on how the extracurriculars are discovered...because one thing I've noticed (that hasn't been stated) is that particular information isn't volunteered without some kind of discovery...meaning that if your S.O. don't know, they shouldn't look for you to tell them... ...and I missed your last statement...about why people just can't be adult about it? Again, from my experiences, when you (as the philanderer) sit your S.O. down and begin being the honest adult, usually your S.O. reverts back to adolescence....or worse, kicks in with the histronics that completely derails the conversation and negates your attempt at honesty.... [Edited 10/22/08 18:27pm] He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
(George Eliot) the video for the above... 
http://www.youtube.com/wa...re=related | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
I don't give a fuck what men or women are programed or not programed to do. I just don't care.
I just do what I want to do and just deal with whatever consequences come my way for doing what I do with whomever I am doing it with. I have no interest in figuring out why anyone really does anything when it comes to this stuff. I don't care enough to want to know. I just take what's directly being presented to me and deal with that. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
JustErin said: I don't give a fuck what men or women are programed or not programed to do. I just don't care.
I missed you, pumpkin. I just do what I want to do and just deal with whatever consequences come my way for doing what I do with whomever I am doing it with. I have no interest in figuring out why anyone really does anything when it comes to this stuff. I don't care enough to want to know. I just take what's directly being presented to me and deal with that.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: And they have every right to be upset when it's a committed relationship and he's cheating. My point was to show that most women can't handle the truth AFTER he's cheated, therefore, the man will pretty much always choose to lie and deceive to avoid a possible breakup, fight, hurting her with the truth, or (your favorite, SCNDLS) serious bodily harm . Yeah, I'ma fuck a nucca up BUT I'll tell him before it happens that I'm prone to fucking him up so it's not like it's a surprise and shit.  I believe you, too!nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
union119 said: people cheat cuz they've got nothing better to do.
seriously. get a hobby. What you think cheating IS? nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: union119 said: people cheat cuz they've got nothing better to do.
seriously. get a hobby. What you think cheating IS? | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Stymie said: MuthaFunka said: What you think cheating IS? nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
reneGade20 said: Which is why I specifically stated in my post that if you PERSONALLY want to hear it, then good for you...I'm not putting ANYTHING off on you. ...this isn't about being in denial or living in a fantasy...and its rather dismissive of you to say so... there are people who, for whatever reason, would rather not know, regardless of what they might think is going on behind their back...it also depends on how the extracurriculars are discovered...because one thing I've noticed (that hasn't been stated) is that particular information isn't volunteered without some kind of discovery...meaning that if your S.O. don't know, they shouldn't look for you to tell them...
...and I missed your last statement...about why people just can't be adult about it? Again, from my experiences, when you (as the philanderer) sit your S.O. down and begin being the honest adult, usually your S.O. reverts back to adolescence....or worse, kicks in with the histronics that completely derails the conversation and negates your attempt at honesty.... I'm sorry, that was not personally directed towards you.. it's that generalized notion of folks with 'but folks don't want the truth'.. and yes, (in red) I call that denial because they don't want to face what might be real.. they ignore it and lie to themselves and pretend they are happy (and some of them will even go as far as saying it's not even happening, when it is) .... if folks are comfortable living that way, so be it.... I'm not one of those folks... and also.. folks being adults, well yeah alot of hell comes from the drama.. the guilty party should just be man enough to deal with whatever comes (since they lit that match) the other party actting as an adult? well.. they should just get a shot gun and call it a day... lol I'm kidding.. kidding | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: Honey said: Women don't appreciate it at all either, Mutha... Grind a Q-tip in your ear, pull it out, and look at that filth! That's your dick. Yeah, but men's egos bruise A LOT easier than women's egos. Men hold MAJOR grudges against their chick if he found out she cheated while most women are already conditioned that their man MAY POSSIBLY CHEAT. Most men don't ever have that cross their minds because our egos won't allow it. Okay, Mutha  , but the way I see it is, where you wrote "men" in your post you should have written "women", and vice versa.
 | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
paintedlady said: Honey said: Women don't appreciate it at all either, Mutha... Grind a Q-tip in your ear, pull it out, and look at that filth! That's your dick. OMG!!! this is siggy material right heah!  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: Yeah, I'ma fuck a nucca up BUT I'll tell him before it happens that I'm prone to fucking him up so it's not like it's a surprise and shit. I believe you, too! You betta believe it. 
But I let a man know up front what he's dealing with so he can proceed at his own risk. And I expect/demand the same courtesy regardless of whether I'm in a commited or casual relationship.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: I believe you, too! You betta believe it.
But I let a man know up front what he's dealing with so he can proceed at his own risk. And I expect/demand the same courtesy regardless of whether I'm in a commited or casual relationship.  Damn! What YOU plan on doin'? nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: You betta believe it.
But I let a man know up front what he's dealing with so he can proceed at his own risk. And I expect/demand the same courtesy regardless of whether I'm in a commited or casual relationship. Damn! What YOU plan on doin'? I'm not "planning" anything cuz that would show premeditation.  Just sayin. . .  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: SCNDLS said: You betta believe it.
But I let a man know up front what he's dealing with so he can proceed at his own risk. And I expect/demand the same courtesy regardless of whether I'm in a commited or casual relationship. Damn! What YOU plan on doin'?  What? You forget she's Latino?!? That comes standard.... | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
paintedlady said: MuthaFunka said: Damn! What YOU plan on doin'? What? You forget she's Latino?!? That comes standard.... 
Black and Latina. . . yeah, I got "it" (the crazy) honest as my aunt says.
And I'm not even saying I'd commit bodily harm to another person but there would be some retribution of some kind if this were my husband. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SCNDLS said: MuthaFunka said: Damn! What YOU plan on doin'? I'm not "planning" anything cuz that would show premeditation. Just sayin. . . Oh lawd!nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
paintedlady said: MuthaFunka said: Damn! What YOU plan on doin'? What? You forget she's Latino?!? That comes standard.... Oh is that how it is?nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MuthaFunka said: paintedlady said: What? You forget she's Latino?!? That comes standard.... Oh is that how it is?You know we be some "passionate" heffas. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
paintedlady said: MuthaFunka said: Oh is that how it is?You know we be some "passionate" heffas. You ain't NEVA lied! nWo: bboy87 - Timmy84 - LittleBlueCorvette - MuthaFunka - phunkdaddy - Christopher
MuthaFunka - Black...by popular demand | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Here is my conclusion to all this:
the thread should be entitled: "Why does ANYONE cheat, and why do MEN feel they are entitled to do it?" | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ZombieKitten said: Here is my conclusion to all this:
the thread should be entitled: "Why does ANYONE cheat, and why do MEN feel they are entitled to do it?" Zombie  .. you know there will be no resolution to that.. at all... there is no type of rational to even try to comprehend.... men  .. and now this joke I heard applies .. all women's problems begin with 'Men'... 'Men'strual cramps, 'Men'tal anxiety...'Men'opause, .. like we just can't escape this 'Men' problem (sorry to all the innocent guys) lol | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |