evenstar3 said:

get the cell phone out of your purse and go: excuse me one second, this must be michael.

well, unless un-needed man's name is also michael =p

.
[Edited 10/19/08 21:43pm]

What signal would I prefer? There is no way I'd prefer to hear that someone is not interested!

And unfortunately, there's not an easy way to send that signal to certain men. Be nice in any way and they'll still think there's a chance.

For them, you might have to work it into a conversation how you love that there is no chemistry between you and you can just be friends. And even then he might not get it.

And you know what? I've hung around long enough for a woman to change her mind! That's the kind of chance that keeps us oblivious to the hints

Possibly her making out with and doing another guy right before and after she always hangs out with you...

ehuffnsd said:

Nope. It's probably a more common behaviour among gay people, but plenty of non-gay folk do it too.

Hell, I've only actually been in a relationship with one of the people I've slept with.

evenstar3 said:

Gotta give the dude credit for trying.

Go casual. Get your point across but allow dude to save his face (that's important to us guys).

"You're an awesome friend, "Joe." (slap him on the shoulder) I appreciate having you in my life. You're a great sounding board. And, you help me understand a guy's perspective. We just gotta get you a woman. I'll help with advice and stuff.

But she's gotta be out there... you know... somewhere..... ELSE..."

ufoclub said:

omg I went out with this guy once, I was SO NOT INTERESTED IN HIM but he was gonna keep calling me, I just knew it. The only way to get through to him was to organise to meet up with another guy (that I WAS into) and pash him in front of the first guy

evenstar3 said:

apparently a man dedicated to "the cause"...

are kudos in order??

1, If she mentions her boyfriend or someone she's interested in--that's a great way of letting me know without her having to get uncomfortably direct.

2. Though I prefer direct. Just tell me.

3. If she's ugly--it's s clear signal that nothing's going to happen.


there are alot really. It depends on the girl and her communication style. But don't string a guy along if you know he's interested just cause you need a fallback companion. That shit is wrong.

ThreadBare said:

i was going to say reference your hubby and house full of kids a lot but this sounds way better

Most of the time it works the best if the guy sees you in the company of another man that he at least would assume is your boyfriend (or better yet, husband!).

The most sensible "signal" is telling the person you're not interested when they make a move. Unfortunately, even telling upfront that you are interested might not sometimes work, because if the male is neurotic enough he can effectively convince himself that if you'll just spend some time with him, "you will see the real him" and get interested too. A really hard case is going to say to himself something like, "okay, I'm going to give it a year..."

That's when the bells should start ringin.

Oh yeah, not insisting on pursuing the modern double standard of having male friends is an option too. In most of the cases, and if we are honest about it, it would be reasonable for the female to ask herself whether the habit of surrounding herself with male friends is something she does for the sake of compensating for bad self-esteem, or similar. Some pretty girls often end up going down this route, as they'll have tons of male friends around them and then act really surprised when the guys start expressing their infatuation. This is something I've observed in the university circles for years, for some "inexplainable reason" it is the prettiest of the young women who happen to have the most males surrounding them - but they're just friends, you know? If the other person is visibly interested and has been so from the start, there shouldn't always such a strong insistence on "keeping it on the level of friendship" - it seldom works that way. Then you're just feeding off the guy's neuroses, sometimes it's just better distancing that person from yourself. Works for both parties that way.

Last option if nothing else works, tell him you're really into fishing and hunting. Preferably both.

You all are making this wayyyyy too complicated. Recipe for him just being your friend:
YOU-take your hand...
reach down and scratch your crotch
smell your fingers
HIM- *stunned*
then after the shock he'll be thinking
'can't f*ck that one...damn.'

= JUST FRIENDS

If he ever starts talking how much he likes you, or looks at you with a loving eye... then just repeat "Just Friends" recipe.

paintedlady said:

you don't know men very well

turning her face away when you try to kiss her.

I think maybe the only thing that gets a man off a woman's back is for him to get a girlfriend.

"What signals do you prefer to get from a woman that let you know clearly she likes you as a friend, and nothing more?"

When I was single, the best signal was for the woman to just SAY "hey, fucker...we're just friends!!" Other than that, the best signal would always be asking me for advice on how to deal with other guys...or when she refers to you (when speaking to other females) as "her conscience" ...

NDRU said:

Say it isn't so!

NDRU said:

Co-sign....I know guys who have slept with a woman after she gave another one of our boys the clap....

...jus' sayin'...

reneGade20 said:

paintedlady said:

Same thing I said....

evenstar3 said:

why do women always think they have to use signal-language? We're not fucking deaf! (at least, most of us are not!)

abierman said:

abierman said:

and we often get in trouble for not recognizing signals (when we're in a relationship). Excellent point.

novabrkr said:

Of course, a lot of women just have a lot of male friends because they happen to enjoy their friendship. It's not always about ulterior motives.

Most of my friends are guys, and I care about them deeply. But I wouldn't fuck or date most of them if I was paid to, because I just don't think of them in that way.

novabrkr said:

Whilst your theory is interesting, and probably true in some cases, in mine it sure isn't! I have always had males friends, since I'm one of the guys. It is simply just easier to be with them. I am not expected to divulge secrets or confess stuff, or match stories (as in the case of girlfriends, who bond using the information exchange, which I find totally draining) we can just hang out, have a few beers, tell rude jokes or be obnoxious. MUCH easier

That guy coming to see me today is a keen hunter and fisherman, so I better steer clear of that line

evenstar3 said:

If a man or woman can't pick up on the signals....they are either twelve years old...or just plain stupid!!

Or a STALKER!!

claiming to have herpes will keep it strictly platonic

DexMSR said:

or just a normal man, deeply in denial, as usual

abierman said:

Exactly, JUST SAY IT.

eikonoklastes said:

at which point? after they have tried to kiss/grope you? eeew

you kind of want to head them off at the pass, before it gets icky like that