This is common among cultural lines so this isn't something that is relegated to any one race. But I have noticed that a lot of people treat their sons like kings and that they can do no wrong and take their daughters for granted.

I wouldn't expect anyone to actually admit it but if you're one of those parents that elevate your sons to godhood, think how your daughter feels. If you recognize him even in his failures but don't recognize the contributions your daughter gives to the family, you're not helping either child.

Why do people do this?

IMO most mothers, especially single mothers do this. They raise their daughters and spoil their sons. I also think there's an inate competition/conflict dynamic at work when it comes to mothers and daughters.
[Edited 10/21/08 12:49pm]

I can't say this happened to me at all as a child. My brother and I were both treated fairly equally, if anything I was babied a bit, being the girl and being 5 years younger than my brother.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Yikes, I feel like Supa is pointing his fingers at me.
I admit I have an enormous admiration for my 25 year old son, I put him on a pedestal. But, I think I also put my girls up high high high, it is just that I gave birth to him at 17, I was young and very stupid. And he grew up to be such a brilliant young man, that is educated and has an awesome job. I always tell my daughters that they have alot to live up to, but they are proud of him as well, he has set an excellent example about what doing your homework, staying out of trouble and keep your nose in the books, can do. I do not take my girls for granted at all...but I do have my son on a high horse.

PaisleyPark5083 said:

Well let me give you an example. I know of a mother who has 2 sons and 2 daughters. The first son, who is the first child, was spoiled and the next 2 children were daughters and they didn't receive the same treatment. Then came the 4th child which was a boy and of course you're going to baby the baby.

Well the first son is the most sickeningly selfish person. He would have no issue whatsoever eating in front of starving babies and not sharing. He's wickedly selfish like that. The younger son is in and out of jail and through all his BS the mom has always defended him like nothing was even happening.

The second daughter became a total mess, and didn't talk to her mom. This left the first daughter who actually cleaned the house, paid her mom rent when she got her job as a teen, took care of her younger siblings, cooked. In otherwords she was a stand in for her mother and has backed her mother like you wouldn't believe and yet the mother showed no allegience to her. No appreciation, no thanks. But when it came to those fuckup sons it was nothing but adulation and praise.

WTF?

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Ok, then that wasn't about me. My son takes care of his little sisters. We always tell the girls, that he is the 3rd parent, because he can be just as strict if he thinks the girls are taking advantage of ole Mom. He helps us with the girls financialy also, he has no problem going to the store with them and letting them chose gifts, clothes etc. Or treating them to the movies, out to lunch. I think I did good in the son department, and I am doing my hardest in the daughter department.

EXCUSE Me ?

I KNOW you arn't asking ME this

I can honestly say I do not do this. Of course I have three daughters and no sons.....

No ...if anything I getting accused of favouring my daughter (well only on this site....thanks to some bloody twit called Kenny )

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Supa.. you grew up in my neighborhood for real lol ..

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

.. Supa.. that is the very reason I have no kids today .. what I highlighted in green... and oh my damn in the highlighted pink

Only girls in my family.

If I suddenly by the grace of god, conceived a girl child, she would be the centre of my fucking universe!

"Do you elevate your son while taking your daughter for granted?"

no, but i know someone who elevates themselves whilst taking me for granted.

I would have to say no...I try and treat all my kids the same. I will admit raising my son is much easier then it was raising my girls. But I don't feel I do this.

No, I did not elevate my son as a single parent.

I have two boys and a girl and let me tell u I DO NOT elevate one above the other in the least! My daughter is a very strong and very independant female and I seriously doubt she would allow anyone to eclipse her anyway
My children are all treated equally
And for the record my sister is a single mother of 7 children....3 boys and 4 girls..and I have never seen not heard her elevate one above another at all.

Ocean said:

so true.....

i have one brother & 3 sisters and when we were growing up my mother thought ( and still thinks) the sun shines out of his behind.

i have a son & a daughter and i like to think that i treat them equally. although they have quite different personalities.

i know i treated them differently as babies though, but i think that thats always the way with the first child, you are afraid that you will break them or something.