maybe it is just my family, but i am dreading the thoughts of my cousins wedding coming up soon. i don't like her friends, her mother is a total bitch, there are a lot of alcoholics, the list goes on.

problem is i actually like my cousin so i have to go.

plus i know that they are spending money that they don't have on a big wedding, that part of it annoys me as well.
i actually don't understand getting yourself into massive debt for a wedding. this is more about a piss-up than the actual ceremony.

am i alone in dis-likng expensive weddings?

Just go to support her and no one is holding a gun to your head for you to stay. Just when you start to feel uncomfortable, just leave...

Angelic1302 said:

that's the plan.

I hate all weddings and when I know they are coming I book a vacation.

CarrieLee said:

that's a good plan. a hol would be heavenly right now, but unfortuantely is out of the question.

I went to 3 weddings the month of August. The first one was a co-workers daughters, it was very frou-frou, but they could afford it so who cares. Then I went to my husbands nieces wedding, it was an outside wedding, at the Polo Club in Montecito, Calif. also very frou-frou, but her fiance had been saving for ages for this wedding, so I did not feel guilty for stuffing my self in shrimp. The last one, a week ago, was my favorite. My niece got married, it was very nice, but not frou-frou. It was elegant and tasteful, they both had saved for a year and a half for thier wedding, and it came out as planned. The best part was that they only invited immediate family and best friends. It was intimate and filled with only people who wanted to be there.

My Sis is gettin' hitched in about two weeks and she has planned the most pretentious, fake-ass wedding. It's pretty much what I expected of her based on her character but yeesh! Sorry folks but I believe in my heart that my sister is shallow and has NO taste! Been that way for decades...

It will be held at a Golf Course (bleah...)

The color is Teal (can anyone say hello 1992!)

All the bridesmaids have these big flouncy dresses with poofy sleeves! (xtra-yeesh!)

My kids are the flower girls so we have to play along but I'm afraid the event will be insufferable...

Org, give me strength!

RenHoek said:

good luck with that. at least though you can leave early enough because of the kids.
some of the song choices my cousin is making are cracking me up.
'the first time ever i saw your face' is to be sung in the church.

angelcat said:

Oddly enough, my kids LOVE their Auntie (It's my punishment...) so we couldn't leave until they pass out. On top of that because we are part of the "inner circle" they've reserved a bungalow on the course for us which means we'll be making a weekend of this affair. The only good I see coming out of this is my future Bro-in-law is a pretty cool guy so at least there's that... well, that and I get to play dress up and get saucy...

My entire wedding cost less then my good friends wedding veil
around 300$ less

RenHoek said:

well make the most of it then. order up some room service.
it will prob be fine. my cousins wedding is going to be fancy enough. lots of girls who look like wanna be wags, fake tan alert. at least there will be alcohol, even if half my family can't hold their liquor.
.

Listen...if you really care for your cousin, then dissasociate yourself from your personal feelings about this CUSTOM and just go and have a good time. Eat, drink, dance and be merry.

My wife is JUST like you...if she is annoyed about someone or something, then it completely ruins her day.

However, my take on it; c'est la vie. In a similar situation (an elaborate 1st birthday party), I told her; Are YOU paying for it? Are you going to be setting up the tables and cleaning up afterwards? Are you going to be grabbing X[person she despises]X by the hand and dancing a few songs?

Go, eat some food, listen to some good music, share some laughs and memories with whomever you do get along with, and think nothing of anyone or anything else that is ultimately inconsequential. By not going - or worse going with a sour puss on - you're only hurting yourself and your relationship with your loved one.

Mach said:

well done. it shouldn't matter what you are wearing too much or how many flowers are in the centre piece. some people go seriously crazy spending money on crap they think will make the day better somehow. if you ask me, you are only giving yourself things to worry about.

angelcat said:

Oh yeah! Don't get me wrong, I love a good wedding and I have a few tricks up my sleeve to make this one awesome (nothing wild but we'll probably do The Time Warp!!) but I just shake my head when I hear of some of her choices...

For example... she set up her wedding using this BigDay.com thing and asked guests to pay for portions of the honeymoon flight to Bora Bora... each portion is $100 and the website asks if you'd like to pay XX of 30 available or some such nonsense... I find that tactless and crude... am I wrong here?

PurpleJedi said:

good advice. it won't ruin my day. i actually like the church part, because i consider that to be the most important part. once a certain relative keeps well away from me i'll be fine. plus there will be wine.

angelcat said:

I bought my dress ( non wedding type ) at a 75% off sale ( I think it cost me maybe 15 bucks ! )

I had only 2 red roses which my husband and I handed to our children as we walked to the alter

I made my own wedding cake

angelcat said:

Listen...after a few cocktails...that certain family member won't even BE in the same room as you!

RenHoek said:

i don't like that kind of wedding list. i think it is kind of rude to expect people to automatically give x amount of money, minimum.
100 dollars/euro is a lot of money to most people. it's like celebrate our wedding, pay for our honeymoon.

Mach said:

Mach - you are a true goddess.

PurpleJedi said:

heres hoping. but that f*cker is usually the last man standing.

PurpleJedi said:

thanx

I did that because my Dad pointed out to me how very important my wedding day had been in the dreams of my Mom as I grew up

I would have done it a bit differently otherwise

Mach said:

how so?

Mach said:

angelcat said:

It would have not been in her christian church
It would have been at midnight outside by candle light - dark/new moon
The Vows we wrote would have been a bit less "church" friendly
A bit smaller invite list then the 20 people That came to the church ( 4 were nosey UNinvited relatives ! )
The minister would not have been Christian

just to start ...

Mach, you never cease to amaze me...

Mach said:

i like your style. if i was ever to get married it would prob just be me, my partner (obviously) and our kids.

RenHoek said:

I have not been able to yet find my small wedding album
I have looked and looked

I'm getting married in a matter of weeks and my best man is getting married a week before me.

Now, I didn't want a huge wedding that costs tons of money but her fam is insisting. So it'll be 20 people I know and 230 people I really don't. The money is creating problems as I'm still making sure the bills are paid but not really contributing to this event that is now in the thousands of dollars. Things will all work out but I have a feeling I'll never hear the end of how much money I've brought to the table. The ring is still being paid for and that wasn't cheap.

Everything is a big deal, her fam is pressuring her on minutia and what time things are planned for...pictures from 5 to 5:45, ceremony begins at 5:50, etc.

After close to a year planning this, I've just had enough of the wedding talk.
Then there's my best man's wedding and the conversations continue...2 tuxes, 2 bachelor parties, 2 full on events. If I make it through this whole thing and am still married it'll be a fucking miracle.

I see why people make the choice to go to Vegas and be done with it (which was my initial suggestion)

My entire wedding cost less than $300.
Lasted over 30 years.
Decent investment. That thirty dollar dress was used by two of my sisters in law and was later converted to a bride of frankenstein costume for my 5 year old!

Mach said:

Ohhh Mach, that's not good! I want you wedding pics all up in my thread!!! Keep searching, I hope you find it!!!