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PrintableAce said: Anxiety said: my day has been seriously lacking in wit, though i did giggle at some of my cat grady's caterwauling when my other cat chuck was taunting him this morning. so i guess:
"MMMMMwwwwuuuhhRROWWRR!!!" would be the funniest thing i've heard all day. You do realize that you and NDRU will both burn in hell, right?  can i help it i suffered from a distinct lack of zippy bon mots today? is that somehow MY fault? it probably is, but so what.  | |
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Anxiety said: can i help it i suffered from a distinct lack of zippy bon mots today?
is that somehow MY fault? Did I just click on my Elyse Sewell LiveJournal bookmark by accident?  |
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Anxiety said: my day has been seriously lacking in wit, though i did giggle at some of my cat grady's caterwauling when my other cat chuck was taunting him this morning. so i guess:
"MMMMMwwwwuuuhhRROWWRR!!!" would be the funniest thing i've heard all day. He's a lot more eloquent on his MySpace profile. The Normal Whores Club | |
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"Something smells like dog in here... maybe it's paper." | |
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A delusional bitch at work told us yesterday that she was close, personal friends with Dale Earnhardt Jr and that he was flying her from Cedar Rapids, Iowa to some place in California so she could learn to time Nascar races. Her flight was supposed to take off yesterday afternoon.
Today, she said her flight got cancelled due to "security measures" but she will definitely be visiting Dale's home in October.  What a fucking wackadoo!Shake it til ya make it  | |
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JuliePurplehead said: Today, she said her flight got cancelled due to "security measures" but she will definitely be visiting Dale's home in October.
Yes, and by "security measures", she means she was served with a restraining order. And by "visiting Dale's home in October", she means she will disguise herself as a trick-or-treater, jump him when he opens the door and and snap a pic for her Facebook as the authorities are dragging her away.  |
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Just this electrolyte powder stuff I had this morning made me chuckle:
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I was at the emergency room this afternoon and heard this
kid: mom! mom! mom! mom: what?! kid: my butt must be hungery mom: WHAT? kid: my butt must be hungery cause it's eating my underwear  I fell you laughing Just Call Me Afrochick
I love you mom | |
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It's 7.30 am, I haven't heard anybody say anything yet It is not known why FuNkeNsteiN capitalizes his name as he does, though some speculate sunlight deficiency caused by the most pimpified white guy afro in Nordic history.
- Lammastide | |
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"JOOOOOEEEEE BIIIIIDENNNNN!"
My three year old said this. | |
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G0d said: What I don't like is telling LIES.
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You're internet service will be restored by 10pm ms.
 11:11 pm.
I'm jacking someones unsecured access...  Should I check my bank account? | |
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dreamfactory313 said: Theres an empty tampon wrapper in the elevator.
Yes folks, some very talented young lady must have tended to her business in an elevator today at my college. I couldnt believe what I was seeing. Better than the girls at my school who prefer to just stick their used pads on the wall. 
As for the funniest thing : http://www.demonbaby.com/...aiian.html | |
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NoodleSoup said: Just this electrolyte powder stuff I had this morning made me chuckle:
 | |
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shanti0608 said: NoodleSoup said: Just this electrolyte powder stuff I had this morning made me chuckle:
I know!
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"lol he knew u liked sausage"
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"There is no GOD". "LOVE YOURSELF AS ALL PEOPLE" | |
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NoodleSoup said: shanti0608 said: I know!
I am guessing it did not kill you. | |
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Joe Biden mistakenly called John McCain 'George' McCain. | |
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Dayclear said: Joe Biden mistakenly called John McCain 'George' McCain.
That has a nice ring to it. 
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Apparently this guy missed the pause on the teleprompter
i laughed so hard..my mouth was bleeding cuz i banged it on the computer | |
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Ace said: JuliePurplehead said: Today, she said her flight got cancelled due to "security measures" but she will definitely be visiting Dale's home in October.
Yes, and by "security measures", she means she was served with a restraining order. And by "visiting Dale's home in October", she means she will disguise herself as a trick-or-treater, jump him when he opens the door and and snap a pic for her Facebook as the authorities are dragging her away. Shake it til ya make it | |
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DanceWme said: Apparently this guy missed the pause on the teleprompter
DanceWme said: i laughed so hard..my mouth was bleeding cuz i banged it on the computer
Damn girl be careful. I've done too tho I graduated bitches!!! 12-19-09  | |
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That is hard to say. I have been in P&R today. Hard to narrow it down.  | |
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I saw this is someone's sig on another website
"There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them." | |
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... 'Why is the guy you invest your money to called the 'Broker'? lol | |
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On a sales course today we were teaching meeting prep and one of my guys was asked "what are the 3 worst questions that you could be asked in this up coming meeting?"
His first answer was "have you just farted?" | |
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DanceWme said: Apparently this guy missed the pause on the teleprompter
i laughed so hard..my mouth was bleeding cuz i banged it on the computer
I just watched it three times. The Normal Whores Club | |
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