It could be a joke, or something that's fucking hilarious for no damn reason.

For me it was

"Get out of here, you hag!!!"

"I love my good eye"

My 5 year old found out yesterday she needs glasses, she has a "lazy right eye"
and just now we got back from filling her perscription for glasses, and she looks at me and says: "I love my good eye"

PaisleyPark5083 said:

My 8 year old was having trouble with her hair this morning and shrieked out through tears, "I want to shave my head and buy a WIG!"

FunkMistress said:

sounds like me some days...

Theres an empty tampon wrapper in the elevator.

Yes folks, some very talented young lady must have tended to her business in an elevator today at my college. I couldnt believe what I was seeing.

dreamfactory313 said:

My girlfriend said to me "You're so cruel and I hate you!!"

" bitch I'd hump your fucking toes if you'd let me "

Mach said:

He must have a tiny penis.

On that note, I just started working at a day center for adults with developmental disabilities.

Today one of my people took off her shoes and socks, spit on her fingers and started rubbing it between her toes.

FunkMistress said:

Ewww

I was trying to eat some pizza ...

Mach said:

NDRU said:

Maybe she said that because you laugh at shit like this?

"A muffin is a bald cupcake!"

http://www.youtube.com/wa...Dfp45Utg5k

FunkMistress said:

Ooh, meta!

Ace said:

Ass.

FunkMistress said:

I like to be cruel. Is that so wrong?

FunkMistress said:

I actually thought about cracking the same joke.

Ace said:

It was pretty obvious, wasn't it?

I'm getting desperate in my old age.

NDRU said:

Not if it's to be kind and it's in the right measure. Some might even say that it's a very good sign and that it means that you love her.

FunkMistress said:

Aren't we all?

Ace said:

Seriously. I mean, even JerseyKRS married an Orger.

FunkMistress said:

"Cassandra should have "Man Cave" written on her ass"

noonblueapples said:

Sex is like your income... You never disclose what you get, but you always think others are getting more!

brought to you & I by the UPS drivers of the Yay Area!!

noonblueapples said:

Was this on Stern?

FunkMistress said:

I saw a neon sign in a catalog that said man cave, puportedly for garages (or S&M playrooms). I was telling my friend how stupid it was, and she attributed it to the slutty girl she works with

my day has been seriously lacking in wit, though i did giggle at some of my cat grady's caterwauling when my other cat chuck was taunting him this morning. so i guess:

"MMMMMwwwwuuuhhRROWWRR!!!"

would be the funniest thing i've heard all day.

Anxiety said:

You do realize that you and NDRU will both burn in hell, right?

Ace said:

I was only kidding, but that anx is one sick puppy!