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Printablesammij said: applekisses said: Hmmm...I see what you're saying. I wonder then, if she's picking up negative stuff about being black, I wonder if she's picking up vanity stuff in the same way. Just sort of seeing some people's (via media or in real life) reactions and then reacting herself as she thinks is appropriate (as she's seen other people do - could be anybody). That poor baby. I totally understand you wanting to shelter her from all this. Growing up is hard. it is... i don't want her growing up the way i did.. that's all i want for her i don't want her overwhelmed with images of "how to look" i don't want her growing up hating herself for being black (not the point of the thread i know but it's another issue we're dealing with her) i just don't want her to have the self-esteem issues i had growing up   I understand.
Maybe all you can do at this point is combat that negativity with all the positive things you can tell her and show her. Plus, you're obviously a really good role model. It breaks my heart when little ones feel the pressures of the evils of the world - we all as adults have a hard enough time with them. But as her auntie you can help guide her.  I don't doubt she's in good hands. | |
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LittleRedCorvette said: sammij said: if you guys say so.Sammi, as a mom, if I was concerned, here's what I'd say, "Khalida, I'm sorry for walking in on you when you were looking at yourself in the mirror. You have a beautiful body. But I'm curious about something, where'd you learn to wear your underwear like that?" Don't push though if she doesn't want to answer. But she may come right out and say she saw it on TV or in a "book/magazine". And then take it from there. Explain that most girls don't wear their underwear like that, or however you want to explain it to her. Just really don't make too big of a deal out of it. i think this is good advice. on the one hand, you don't want to make her feel ashamed of her body or make her feel that it's wrong to be curious about her self image/body image - on the other hand, if she's getting messages about how she "should" look from tv, magazines, etc., then it might be a good idea to talk to her about how models and celebrities don't represent what real people look like, and that what is considered "glamorous" and "beautiful" on television is mostly fantasy and exaggeration, and that it's very simple to be beautiful without having to tart it up. but really, she was just a little girl playing by herself in her room. kids do crazy shit when they're playing alone in their rooms. it usually doesn't mean anything other than "LOOK WHAT I CAN DO!"  | |
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Mach said: sammij said: masturbating or just playing around and seeing where everything is? Real masturbation - consistant rubbing of her clit to what seemd almost ( and maybe was ) orgasm  when the girl was 3 and begane to understand more her mom was able to teach her to go to her room when she wants "alone" time
Little boys will masturbate as they sit and play with their trucks or whatever. They rub and tug on their little erection almost to hard   i think to me that's fine and normal she'll lay on her bed and watch backyardigans while playing with herself
but i think what's bothering me is how she's beginning to learn about sexuality, and not her body (i don't know if that makes sense?) thongs, gstrings, thats apart of female sexuality, and she's not too far gone to see that yet, but masturbating (i've been doing so since i was 6) i think is ok because you're learning about how your body works, and it's not necessarily linked to that aspect of sexuality yet....y'know? [...i think i can, i think i can, i think i can...] | |
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I wouldn't worry too much about it. I'm glad she didn't scold her for it.
SHE'S BEAUTIFUL. MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits" | |
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I think she's fine compared to my nephews.
These 2 walk around grabbing their ding-a-lings all day! The youngest is 2 turning 3 and the oldest is 4 turning 5.
Your niece is a doll, she's just discovering herself! surviving on the thought of loving you, it's just like the water
I ain't felt this way in years... | |
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Tell me about it .....my daughter seemed to go from this
to this ...overnight  (and ur niece is gorgeous btw)
 [Edited 7/17/08 19:32pm] | |
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Mach said: Self discovery
Many little ones I have worked with will hike their undies up and prance round -look in the mirror - shake their booties
I can understand the concern as well I do not see it ( at this point ) as something to really worry about - it seemed innocent enough She is beautiful  I agree with you. I don't see this as anything to be alarmed about either. A few weeks ago my son walked up to me and said, "look" with a smirk. He had taken off his pullups, grabbed one of this dvds and had stuck his penis in the hole. There it was on him. I was like, wtf??
I just told him that he was silly, took it off and left it at that. He has no exposure to adult tv or media...he just did a silly thing. Total self discovery. | |
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JustErin said: Mach said: Self discovery
Many little ones I have worked with will hike their undies up and prance round -look in the mirror - shake their booties
I can understand the concern as well I do not see it ( at this point ) as something to really worry about - it seemed innocent enough She is beautiful I agree with you. I don't see this as anything to be alarmed about either. A few weeks ago my son walked up to me and said, "look" with a smirk. He had taken off his pullups, grabbed one of this dvds and had stuck his penis in the hole. There it was on him. I was like, wtf??
I just told him that he was silly, took it off and left it at that. He has no exposure to adult tv or media...he just did a silly thing. Total self discovery.  That is so funny. | |
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She's so cute
It's really sad what our children are exposed to today. It makes them grow up too fast and in such a negative way. I've got 3 grown daughters and many a time I used to wish I could have raised them somewhere they would not be around this mess. Monitor them and keep them in the church. | |
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But my parents worried about me because I went from being a Sunday school teacher to loving PRINCE and 28 years ago that was a good reason th worry!! | |
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JustErin said: Mach said: Self discovery
Many little ones I have worked with will hike their undies up and prance round -look in the mirror - shake their booties
I can understand the concern as well I do not see it ( at this point ) as something to really worry about - it seemed innocent enough She is beautiful I agree with you. I don't see this as anything to be alarmed about either. A few weeks ago my son walked up to me and said, "look" with a smirk. He had taken off his pullups, grabbed one of this dvds and had stuck his penis in the hole. There it was on him. I was like, wtf??
I just told him that he was silly, took it off and left it at that. He has no exposure to adult tv or media...he just did a silly thing. Total self discovery. ~faints~
Yup  little boys sometimes do really silly things with their penis.
Very cute story | |
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