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PrintableZombieKitten said: BlueZebra said: I would imagine, if it were true love the bliss wouldn't wear off . but as that's already said, isn't monogamy a fucked up concept in todays society ?? I really think that misconception is a huge part in the downfall of many otherwise successful long-term relationships. I really believe it wears off, no matter who you are with, all it does is make you look for someone else, thinking it will be better with that person, when really if you do it the same way again, without work, it will wear off again. This is so true! "I saw a woman with major Hammer pants on the subway a few weeks ago and totally thought of you." - sextonseven | |
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Flowerz said: ThreadBare said: The stories I could tell ya. My twenties and early thirties were a straight-up romantic comedy. My best buddy keeps trying to get me to write about it. And, it wasn't like a "How to Be a Player" thing. It was romantic comedy.  juggled women around, huh? i c ... you should write about it...  Nope, no juggling. Just the comedy that came out of committed relationships... | |
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This thread was a good idea wasn't it paintedlady? | |
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A bit late, and nothing new to add.
As a man who has been married for quite a few years I have always enjoyed the eye candy of other women but never sought anything else - and I feel I have always given off vibes that would prevent me from being in a difficult situation. I've been offered easy sex with no complications (yeah right) and always turned it down so everything was good and I was in control until..... I bumped into someone who was mildly interesting and we were both attracted to each other but I didn't take it seriously. I clearly stated my current (happy) situation and just thought it was a case of "you're rather nice". It seems that I then started to tumble down a path of real attraction based on building a friendship with this person, but luckily nothing happened physically (that's not to say I wasn't effectively being unfaithful to my wife). It has been stopped now as mutually agreed by both parties (obviously my wife has no idea) it was looking pretty dangerous at one point though. I can't define why I got into this situation, had you asked me a few months back then I would say it was impossible. But it is funny what happens when you start to fall for someone that you just seem to connect with. It has left me with a bit of an issue at home but I'm working on giving 100% back to see if I can get back to where I once was. I do know you need to work on keeping things interesting but I can easily accept (even before all this happened) that people just fall out of love. Ideally this shouldn't be an issue as such, but with children involved, one sided feelings etc, I can understand why this isn't very likely to be smooth sailing if one person wants out for no reason other then it has just come to a natural end. I should add that this is all about a friend I know.... [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] | |
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ZombieKitten said: This thread was a good idea wasn't it paintedlady?
Yes It was, thank you for the idea!  | |
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g3ajg said: A bit late, and nothing new to add.
As a man who has been married for quite a few years I have always enjoyed the eye candy of other women but never sought anything else - and I feel I have always given off vibes that would prevent me from being in a difficult situation. I've been offered easy sex with no complications (yeah right) and always turned it down so everything was good and I was in control until..... I bumped into someone who was mildly interesting and we were both attracted to each other but I didn't take it seriously. I clearly stated my current (happy) situation and just thought it was a case of "you're rather nice". It seems that I then started to tumble down a path of real attraction based on building a friendship with this person, but luckily nothing happened physically (that's not to say I wasn't effectively being unfaithful to my wife). It has been stopped now as mutually agreed by both parties (obviously my wife has no idea) it was looking pretty dangerous at one point though. I can't define why I got into this situation, had you asked me a few months back then I would say it was impossible. But it is funny what happens when you start to fall for someone that you just seem to connect with. It has left me with a bit of an issue at home but I'm working on giving 100% back to see if I can get back to where I once was. I do know you need to work on keeping things interesting but I can easily accept (even before all this happened) that people just fall out of love. Ideally this shouldn't be an issue as such, but with children involved, one sided feelings etc, I can understand why this isn't very likely to be smooth sailing if one person wants out for no reason other then it has just come to a natural end. I should add that this is all about a friend I know.... [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] Thanks for this.... I was going to ask what was the trigger that made you realize that it was getting "dangerous" but then I see its about a friend so... 
pretty avie BTW  | |
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ZombieKitten said: paintedlady said: I wonder if men think the same way, or is it just us ladies that are like this? I don't even NOTICE the hot guys 
guys NEVER stop noticing I'm willing to bet Slave To The Testosteron. We can't help it. |
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SCNDLS said: eikonoklastes said: Okay, I think I need to throw up now...
THERE you are. . . You REALLY scared me with all that talk about having feelings and being in love.  surviving on the thought of loving you, it's just like the water
I ain't felt this way in years... | |
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g3ajg said: A bit late, and nothing new to add.
As a man who has been married for quite a few years I have always enjoyed the eye candy of other women but never sought anything else - and I feel I have always given off vibes that would prevent me from being in a difficult situation. I've been offered easy sex with no complications (yeah right) and always turned it down so everything was good and I was in control until..... I bumped into someone who was mildly interesting and we were both attracted to each other but I didn't take it seriously. I clearly stated my current (happy) situation and just thought it was a case of "you're rather nice". It seems that I then started to tumble down a path of real attraction based on building a friendship with this person, but luckily nothing happened physically (that's not to say I wasn't effectively being unfaithful to my wife). It has been stopped now as mutually agreed by both parties (obviously my wife has no idea) it was looking pretty dangerous at one point though. I can't define why I got into this situation, had you asked me a few months back then I would say it was impossible. But it is funny what happens when you start to fall for someone that you just seem to connect with. It has left me with a bit of an issue at home but I'm working on giving 100% back to see if I can get back to where I once was. I do know you need to work on keeping things interesting but I can easily accept (even before all this happened) that people just fall out of love. Ideally this shouldn't be an issue as such, but with children involved, one sided feelings etc, I can understand why this isn't very likely to be smooth sailing if one person wants out for no reason other then it has just come to a natural end. I should add that this is all about a friend I know.... [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] Feel for you g3ajg, it's really difficult. I'm in v similar situation. I was completely wrapped up in my partner of 13 yrs - noone else mattered, never even thought about anything with anyone else. Then along came a new work colleague...we spent a good few months flirting with eachother and exchanging 'inappropriate' texts and emails. I thought it was going somewhere and then he told me...he was proposing to his girlfriend. This was all a year ago. I still can't stop thinking about him. We still see a fair bit of eachother at work and get on really well, I really think there's a connection between us. He's still v flirty (though the emails and texts stopped when he got engaged) but have to keep reminding myself...in 7 weeks he'll be married. 
It's really messed my relationship up with my partner. I love him but can I really be in love with him I feel like this about someone else? Given the opportunity I'm pretty sure I would've left him for this other person - surely that can't be right?! I see myself as having the following options... 1 - forget about this other person (but believe me I've tried and tried) and really give things with my partner a go. 2 - forget the other person and leave my partner - new start and all that 3 - tell this other person how I feel, I know it won't change things but may make me feel better if I know I've done all I can?? 4 - do nothing What do you think? Any of the above? A combination? | |
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starfish100 said: g3ajg said: A bit late, and nothing new to add.
As a man who has been married for quite a few years I have always enjoyed the eye candy of other women but never sought anything else - and I feel I have always given off vibes that would prevent me from being in a difficult situation. I've been offered easy sex with no complications (yeah right) and always turned it down so everything was good and I was in control until..... I bumped into someone who was mildly interesting and we were both attracted to each other but I didn't take it seriously. I clearly stated my current (happy) situation and just thought it was a case of "you're rather nice". It seems that I then started to tumble down a path of real attraction based on building a friendship with this person, but luckily nothing happened physically (that's not to say I wasn't effectively being unfaithful to my wife). It has been stopped now as mutually agreed by both parties (obviously my wife has no idea) it was looking pretty dangerous at one point though. I can't define why I got into this situation, had you asked me a few months back then I would say it was impossible. But it is funny what happens when you start to fall for someone that you just seem to connect with. It has left me with a bit of an issue at home but I'm working on giving 100% back to see if I can get back to where I once was. I do know you need to work on keeping things interesting but I can easily accept (even before all this happened) that people just fall out of love. Ideally this shouldn't be an issue as such, but with children involved, one sided feelings etc, I can understand why this isn't very likely to be smooth sailing if one person wants out for no reason other then it has just come to a natural end. I should add that this is all about a friend I know.... [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] [Edited 7/3/08 6:31am] Feel for you g3ajg, it's really difficult. I'm in v similar situation. I was completely wrapped up in my partner of 13 yrs - noone else mattered, never even thought about anything with anyone else. Then along came a new work colleague...we spent a good few months flirting with eachother and exchanging 'inappropriate' texts and emails. I thought it was going somewhere and then he told me...he was proposing to his girlfriend. This was all a year ago. I still can't stop thinking about him. We still see a fair bit of eachother at work and get on really well, I really think there's a connection between us. He's still v flirty (though the emails and texts stopped when he got engaged) but have to keep reminding myself...in 7 weeks he'll be married.
It's really messed my relationship up with my partner. I love him but can I really be in love with him I feel like this about someone else? Given the opportunity I'm pretty sure I would've left him for this other person - surely that can't be right?! I see myself as having the following options... 1 - forget about this other person (but believe me I've tried and tried) and really give things with my partner a go. 2 - forget the other person and leave my partner - new start and all that 3 - tell this other person how I feel, I know it won't change things but may make me feel better if I know I've done all I can?? 4 - do nothing What do you think? Any of the above? A combination? Any thoughts? Anyone...please | |
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starfish100 said: starfish100 said: Feel for you g3ajg, it's really difficult. I'm in v similar situation. I was completely wrapped up in my partner of 13 yrs - noone else mattered, never even thought about anything with anyone else. Then along came a new work colleague...we spent a good few months flirting with eachother and exchanging 'inappropriate' texts and emails. I thought it was going somewhere and then he told me...he was proposing to his girlfriend. This was all a year ago. I still can't stop thinking about him. We still see a fair bit of eachother at work and get on really well, I really think there's a connection between us. He's still v flirty (though the emails and texts stopped when he got engaged) but have to keep reminding myself...in 7 weeks he'll be married.
It's really messed my relationship up with my partner. I love him but can I really be in love with him I feel like this about someone else? Given the opportunity I'm pretty sure I would've left him for this other person - surely that can't be right?! I see myself as having the following options... 1 - forget about this other person (but believe me I've tried and tried) and really give things with my partner a go. 2 - forget the other person and leave my partner - new start and all that 3 - tell this other person how I feel, I know it won't change things but may make me feel better if I know I've done all I can?? 4 - do nothing What do you think? Any of the above? A combination? Any thoughts? Anyone...please Definetly number 3. I know how it feels to not be able to forget someone no matter what you do. It's best if you try everything you can or you'll regret it and constantly think about what else you possibly could of done. Even if you end up feeling embarrassed and regret telling him because he rejects you. When you get it out of your system it becomes easier to get over. | |
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Arnotts said: starfish100 said: Any thoughts? Anyone...please Definetly number 3. I know how it feels to not be able to forget someone no matter what you do. It's best if you try everything you can or you'll regret it and constantly think about what else you possibly could of done. Even if you end up feeling embarrassed and regret telling him because he rejects you. When you get it out of your system it becomes easier to get over. Thank you. I'll tell him. I know he's still going to go ahead and get married but at least I'll know I've tried. He told me he was going to propose, I wish I'd done something then. Suppose I should learn from that - do everything you can or you'll regret it! | |
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