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Have you ever CONTACTED or been CONTACTED by an OLD FLAME? I can't even remembered how I even got there, but here's an MSN message board that discusses people CONTACTING and BEING CONTACTED by an OLD FLAME.
Unfortunately, many of these tales (contacting old flames from 20-40+ years past!) range from bitter-sweet to out right disasters. Has anyone here been in this BOAT before? CONTACTING or being CONTACTED by a former FLAME? It appears to be something that's--to my suprise--common. Contacting a former flame http://boards.msn.com/Boo...m=Page%3d1 | |
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I'm in touch with my almost all of my exes. Many of them contacted me after a time of no contact. | |
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I'm in touch with most almost all of my exes specially when I return to Michigan where most of them still live.
I contact them, they me - doesn't matter really  we all stayed pretty good friends after the split(s)
. [Edited 6/27/08 13:00pm] | |
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All of them. | |
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That's good. Unfortunately, you two seem to be an exception to the rule, though. Here's one scary confession that actually BOTHERED ME!--posting #147 from MSN:
If you are looking up the old flame chances are you are not happy or contend with your life as it is now. It is a selfish person that thinks that the love ever died, and that where you are at is enough reason to disturb another one's life.
My first love looked me up - we had broken up because he had gone away to college and I was not going to be able to follow along. My family life was difficult and I had to go on my own and work, only attending college at night. After reading this article, we probably did most of the wrong things in emails and phone conversations, yet because I always loved him I accepted this misguided attitude and tried to help him. WE were raised in a caring religious way and I thought that was the least I could do for someone I had cared so much about. He said he needed someone to talk to - that his 2nd marriage was failing apart and he was clueless about what to do to correct it. I believed him and confided in him lots of my own personal conflicts of my marriage. When I finally got the message across that I was not leaving my husband he had his brother's live-in companion come to my home and rant in front of my children & husband all my secrets I had shared. She accused me of things I had not done. I had never met her before, yet she knew personal stuff about me. It was a disaster as he only wanted one thing, for the clock to turn back. For HIS fantasy on life to be re-created. He claimed I had all he had ever wished for - the family and home life, yet his choices were to be an airline pilot and stay away from home constantly. He choose no children, that is why his first wife had left him. We had totally different lifestyles. He was just going thru "midlife" it seems now. He caused emotional pain for me, tried to break up my marriage because I would not leave my husband & children, when I only wanted a friendship. After over 3000 emails, too many long phone calls we now never speak, nor can I trust his judgment to not say negative things about me, or share personal info about me to others. I had trusted him because I thought I still knew him. I wish he had left me alone and kept our memories as happy ones for both of us. I see him as selfish and only self-serving. Think, think, THINK before you contact anyone. WHY are you really doing this and what do you THINK you will gain? IF it is anything more than a friendship, DON'T! SOMETIMES IT'S BEST TO LEAVE THE PAST ALONE!  | |
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PanicAttack said: That's good. Unfortunately, you two seem to be an exception to the rule, though. Here's one scary confession that actually BOTHERED ME!--posting #147 from MSN:
If you are looking up the old flame chances are you are not happy or contend with your life as it is now. It is a selfish person that thinks that the love ever died, and that where you are at is enough reason to disturb another one's life.
My first love looked me up - we had broken up because he had gone away to college and I was not going to be able to follow along. My family life was difficult and I had to go on my own and work, only attending college at night. After reading this article, we probably did most of the wrong things in emails and phone conversations, yet because I always loved him I accepted this misguided attitude and tried to help him. WE were raised in a caring religious way and I thought that was the least I could do for someone I had cared so much about. He said he needed someone to talk to - that his 2nd marriage was failing apart and he was clueless about what to do to correct it. I believed him and confided in him lots of my own personal conflicts of my marriage. When I finally got the message across that I was not leaving my husband he had his brother's live-in companion come to my home and rant in front of my children & husband all my secrets I had shared. She accused me of things I had not done. I had never met her before, yet she knew personal stuff about me. It was a disaster as he only wanted one thing, for the clock to turn back. For HIS fantasy on life to be re-created. He claimed I had all he had ever wished for - the family and home life, yet his choices were to be an airline pilot and stay away from home constantly. He choose no children, that is why his first wife had left him. We had totally different lifestyles. He was just going thru "midlife" it seems now. He caused emotional pain for me, tried to break up my marriage because I would not leave my husband & children, when I only wanted a friendship. After over 3000 emails, too many long phone calls we now never speak, nor can I trust his judgment to not say negative things about me, or share personal info about me to others. I had trusted him because I thought I still knew him. I wish he had left me alone and kept our memories as happy ones for both of us. I see him as selfish and only self-serving. Think, think, THINK before you contact anyone. WHY are you really doing this and what do you THINK you will gain? IF it is anything more than a friendship, DON'T! SOMETIMES IT'S BEST TO LEAVE THE PAST ALONE! AGREE 100% what's in the past stays in the past. "I may not agree with what you say but I'll fight for your right to say it"
Be proud of who you are not what they want you to be... | |
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I don't agree what's past should always stay in the past
I am friends with ex's siblings and their parents and we all had kids together and so on = extended family and HUGE respect levels are maintained All those people are an important part of my life as they were then, now I can't imagine turning my back on all that simply because we split up and if he and I ( they and I ) agree on all that and show respect and love - PFTTT - leave it in the past - NOPE | |
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blueblossom said: PanicAttack said: That's good. Unfortunately, you two seem to be an exception to the rule, though. Here's one scary confession that actually BOTHERED ME!--posting #147 from MSN:
SOMETIMES IT'S BEST TO LEAVE THE PAST ALONE! AGREE 100% what's in the past stays in the past. Maybe the bad shit that may have happened can stay in the past but I'm all about moving forward and I can move forward with them (and am ok with them being) in my life in a different way. A positive way. No bad blood between us at all. I'm friends with them all...some closer than others, but we're all on really good terms and keep in touch. | |
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Yes....last year.....and then the stupid bitch wrecked my car!  | |
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JustErin said: blueblossom said: AGREE 100% what's in the past stays in the past. Maybe the bad shit that may have happened can stay in the past but I'm all about moving forward and I can move forward with them (and am ok with them being) in my life in a different way. A positive way. I agree with this to a point, but it seems that a GREAT deal of people aren't able to do this. They get STUCK and can't move on and sometime they sacrifice GOOD marriages about some distant dream of times past. THUNDERSTRUCK. | |
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abierman said: Yes....last year.....and then the stupid bitch wrecked my car!
why'd she do that?I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F.  | |
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Yeah
A couple of weeks ago my high school love contacted me. He was telling me about how he was thinking of proposing to his girlfriend and blah blah blah. Conversation was cool until he said "before I do anything that big with her, u and I should hang out for awhile" 
No thanks bud! | |
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DanceWme said: Yeah
A couple of weeks ago my high school love contacted me. He was telling me about how he was thinking of proposing to his girlfriend and blah blah blah. Conversation was cool until he said "before I do anything that big with her, u and I should hang out for awhile"
No thanks bud! The hell? 
That boy knows he ain't ready to get married. surviving on the thought of loving you, it's just like the water
I ain't felt this way in years... | |
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KidaDynamite said: DanceWme said: Yeah
A couple of weeks ago my high school love contacted me. He was telling me about how he was thinking of proposing to his girlfriend and blah blah blah. Conversation was cool until he said "before I do anything that big with her, u and I should hang out for awhile"
No thanks bud! The hell?
That boy knows he ain't ready to get married. for real
He just lost the little bit of cupcake points he had. | |
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REDFEATHERS said: abierman said: Yes....last year.....and then the stupid bitch wrecked my car!
why'd she do that?I let her drive.....we had had some drinks..... | |
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abierman said: REDFEATHERS said: why'd she do that?I let her drive.....we had had some drinks..... oh.. i thought you got her mad lol I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. | |
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every couple of years i'll hear from one of my "major" old flames and every few months i might get a "how ya doin" email from someone i used to date for a few months...or every now and then i might drop someone a line. typically it's a very friendly if sometimes minorly awkward encounter, though it's usually via email so that's relatively painless. | |
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REDFEATHERS said: abierman said: I let her drive.....we had had some drinks..... oh.. i thought you got her mad lol not really, I wanted to get in her pants that night.....didn't work out.....police took her to the station instead, left me sitting on the street! | |
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abierman said: REDFEATHERS said: oh.. i thought you got her mad lol not really, I wanted to get in her pants that night.....didn't work out.....police took her to the station instead, left me sitting on the street!  That's why this relationship is an EX! | |
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PanicAttack said: abierman said: not really, I wanted to get in her pants that night.....didn't work out.....police took her to the station instead, left me sitting on the street! That's why this relationship is an EX!  she was friggin' hot and until the accident it looked like it was going to happen.....nothing wrong about sex your ex..... | |
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Every time I need some quick head. That shit is on speed dial. Studies have shown the ass crack of the average Prince fan to be abnormally large. This explains the ease and frequency of their panties bunching up in it. |
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moderatorMars23 said: Every time I need some quick head. That shit is on speed dial.
Man! That's kinda COLD BLOODED! DRACONIAN! Whoa!
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I didn't really date before I met my wife, so I only have one person I'd call a "pseudo-ex." He did contact me a couple years after we parted ways.
Long story short, I was treated darned poorly by him years earlier and he came at me like we'd been long-lost best pals. I told him, "I've got nothing to say to you, but I wish you well. Bye." Verbatim. In retrospect, I think the content of what I said to him was correct, but if I'd truly forgiven him (and I fancied that I had) my tone would likely have been different. It let me know I had some additional healing to do. Aside from that, old crushes contact me from time to time and (more rarely) vice versa. It can be slightly awkward in a school kid kind of way  , but it's usually fun to catch up, poke a bit of fun at ourselves and share where we both are these days.[Edited 6/27/08 16:01pm] Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.” | |
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PanicAttack said: Mars23 said: Every time I need some quick head. That shit is on speed dial.
Man! That's kinda COLD BLOODED! DRACONIAN! Whoa!
Did I say head? I meant meaningful conversation. My bad. Studies have shown the ass crack of the average Prince fan to be abnormally large. This explains the ease and frequency of their panties bunching up in it. |
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It was the lone reason I joined MySpace. I'm lame. | |
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I'm friends (or rather, I am friends until he pisses me off enough by asking for sex that I tell him to sod off until he's cooled off. Yeah, he has a gf he has lived with for at LEAST 5 years) with a guy who used to be madly in love with me when we were in our teens. It was never reciprocated though and I never let on it was either. We were good friends but now we're not as close because of his behaviour. WTF.
I'm best friends with my first love though, we were best friends before our love relationship and we're best friends still. He's dating a woman who's a prosecutor at the war tribunal in the Hague. Mad respect for that woman! 
I've never contacted somebody like that cos.... I was always the one to break up and I'm done with them.  | |
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Lammastide said: I didn't really date before I met my wife, so I only have one person I'd call a "pseudo-ex." He did contact me a couple years after we parted ways.
Long story short, I was treated darned poorly by him years earlier and he came at me like we'd been long-lost best pals. I told him, "I've got nothing to say to you, but I wish you well. Bye." [Edited 6/27/08 16:01pm] I can relate. I remember now how I found that MSN chat board. Years a ago some POTENTIAL-STALKER from PSYCHOS-R-US saw me at my job (still a KID! at the time) and made the INSTANT decision that he was in love and that was that! He did all he could to get in my life--in other words, TRYING TO FORCE HIMSELF ON ME! Several emotional scars later I thought I was finally FREE of that nut (he was CRYING!) until he started calling again almost 2 years later--somewhat pissed I wasn't returning his calls. Go figure! | |
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PanicAttack said: I can't even remembered how I even got there, but here's an MSN message board that discusses people CONTACTING and BEING CONTACTED by an OLD FLAME.
Unfortunately, many of these tales (contacting old flames from 20-40+ years past!) range from bitter-sweet to out right disasters. Has anyone here been in this BOAT before? CONTACTING or being CONTACTED by a former FLAME? It appears to be something that's--to my suprise--common. Contacting a former flame http://boards.msn.com/Boo...m=Page%3d1 yup it has happened a few times Say it's just a dream...
U open up ur eyes and come 2 realize u simply imagined this So u lean over and give her a kiss Here on earth, here on earth, with u it's not so bad Here on earth, here on earth eye don't feel so sad Stay right here | |
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LAST NIGHT I JUST BUMPED INTO...
An old flame that I split up with three weeks ago. She effectively ended it but that's neither here nor there.. Anyway, I was out having drinks with another lady and by pure chance I bumped into the ex as I was leaving the mens room. Couldn't believe it considering we both live miles away from that particular bar. Anyway, we greeted each other, and spoke very briefly, there were no hard feelings and agreed to keep in touch... even though things didn't really finish off well between us.  | |
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No, but last night I met a gorgeous girl with dark eyes and silky black hair, who asked me question, after question, after question, after question. ~Under lock and key* | |
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