I really need to cut down on my 'friends' who e-mail total crap to me.
My mailbox is full when I start work and I get loads of jokes, funny pictures, games, porn etc, needless to say these are usually all read before I open the more important work e-mails I get.

But what drives me really mad is when I get these chain-mail e-mails, saying you gotta send to a certain number of people or you will live an unhappy life, or you will die, or if you send it good luck will come to you. (But then it has gotta be sent in a certain time scale!) WTF??? Some are really scary and threatening. Who starts these?

Luckily I am not that superstitious, so yeah it is probably me who breaks the chain when I trash them.

How many of you get these kind of e-mails? Do they drive you mad like me, or do you HAVE to forward them for fear of what might happen to you if you don't and for your own piece of mind?


Here is one I got this morning...It's not too bad, I have had this one in the past, so it is old, but quite funny anyway...


TO MY DEAR WIFE:
During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times.
I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once
every ten days. The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:

54 times the sheets were clean
17 times it was too late
49 times you were too tired
20 times it was too hot
15 times you pretended to be sleep
22 times you had a headache
17 times you were afraid of waking the baby
16 times you said you were too sore
12 times it was the wrong time of the month
19 times you had to get up early
9 times you said weren't in the mood
7 times you were sunburned
6 times you were watching the late show
5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo
3 times you said the neighbors would hear us
9 times you said your mother would hear us

Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory because:
6 times you just laid there
8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling
4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with
7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished
1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move

===
TO MY DEAR HUSBAND:
I think you have things a little confused. Here are the
reasons you didn't get more than you did:
5 times you came home drunk and tried to screw the cat
36 times you did not come home at all
21 times you didn't cum
33 times you came too soon
19 times you went soft before you got in
38 times you worked too late
10 times you got cramps in your toes
29 times you had to get up early to play golf
2 times you were in a fight and someone kicked you in
the balls
4 times you got it stuck in your zipper
3 times you had a cold and your nose was running
2 times you had a splinter in your finger
20 times you lost the notion after thinking about it all day
6 times you came in your pajamas while reading a dirty book
98 times you were too busy watching football, baseball, etc. on TV
Of the times we did get together:
The reason I laid still was because you missed and were
screwing the sheets.
I wasn't talking about the crack in the ceiling, what I said
was, Would you prefer me on my back or kneeling?"
The time you felt me move was because you farted and I was trying to
breathe.

This game has been played since 1996.
You must send this letter to 7 people.
On the 5th day someone will ask you out or say "I love you."
This is not a joke. It has worked for many years.
If you break the chain, you will have bad luck with guys/girls
forever. This is just for future readers.
This began in 1996,not much of a past, but it works.
So here are the rules:
If you read this on a Sunday, wish for a really fun week
If you read this on a Monday, wish for money
If you read this on a Tuesday, wish for love
If you read this on a Wednesday, wish for success
If you read this on a Thursday, wish for anything you want
If you read this on a Friday, wish for a really hot date
If you read this on a Saturday, wish for an important phone call
Send this to seven people (after you make a wish).
Make sure it is sent as soon as you read it or your wish won't come
true.


What do you make of these?

sometimes there okay but i agree ...there a pain in the ass most of the time esp the ones that say stuff like

"send this to 500 people in 2mins. or you'll have bad luck FOREVER!"

Christopher said:

Ok, yeah I know, so why doesn't everyone who gets one of these e-mails post the damned thing on the org and then you have kinda 'sent' it to about 3000 people. Think of the luck you will get! And you will never die!

This game has been played too long.
Don't reply to this thread.
Otherwise n the 3rd day someone will org note you with an obscenity
This is not a joke. It has worked for Red Feathers too often
If you fail to do this all sorts of horrid things will happen.
This is just for future stupid readers.
This began today.
Here are the rules:
If you read this on a Wednesday, you're halfway through the week
If you read this on a Thursday, why didn'y you visit the org yesterday?
If you read this on Friday, you're not a regular are you?
If you read this on Saturday, you're not an Orthodox Jew
If you read this on Sunday, boy have you been busy?
If you read this on Monday, where on earth have you been?
If you read this on Tuesday, it's good to see your phone line's been reconnected

REDFEATHERS said:

AAAGGGHHH

langebleu said:

LMAO! So it's is YOU who starts these, langebleu?

..the ones that bug me the most are the 'touching' ones...about people with diseases or whatever...and the ones that say 'if you are not ashamed of Jesus send this to 20 people...' or whatever...i am not ashamed of Jesus, but i am ashamed to have 'friends' that would send me these types of emails...

oh yeh..and the 'bad luck' ones...why would you want to send someone bad luck?

I remember before email was known getting chain letters back in junior high with a people passing me a a chain letter to pass on to others now when I see them in my emailbox just brings back memories of my junior high years. I don't reply to chain letters anymore, but I like to read the silly stuff in chain letters.

I cannot stand these! I get them from people all the time who claim that they hate them... but yet they pass them on to me!

to chain emails!!!