ask ANY orger.

I would say bills, you know you can't be as carefree as you were before them. Then it becomes a domino effect into all that other stuff.

i don't think the trapped feeling lasts forever unless you just get complacent about it, which a lot of people do. sometimes i will feel "trapped" in a job or in some other area of life, and eventually i will find some distraction or outlet and eventually find that i don't feel so trapped anymore. i think every once in a while you need to shake things up, whatever that means to you.

jonylawson said:

No that is a choice, you want the trappings of luxury so you work.
My answer stands up

I've spoken on this topic many, many times.
Here's the deal.
When we're young we get tricked into conforming.
It's like you graduate high school, and then go to college and in the span of 4 years you're supposed to figure out what field you want to work in for the rest of your life and pretty much right after that go into the workplace and then find your soulmate. Hurry up! Because then you've got to get married and start a family because "it's time!!!!!"

And then people wonder why "mid-life crisis" happens. You wake up one day and realize "what the hell am i doing????"

Did you marry the person you should've?
Are you happy doing what you do to make a living?

And then to fight off the reality that you've made some serious mistakes, you start trying to buy more stuff to trick yourself into being happy! Maybe it's a new house, a fancy sportscar, some expensive vacations, but none of it works very long.

Here's the deal. Life's too fucking short in reality. And we get one time here (that we remember as far as i'm concerned), so why waste it doing what someone else thinks you should be doing?

There's a difference between a "job" and a "career". If you're truly passionate about something, odds are you can find a way to get paid for it. You may not be rich, but you'll be HAPPY.

Take your TIME with love. Just because you love someone, doesn't mean you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with them. And if it takes some time, THAT'S ALRIGHT.

Basically, do whatever makes you happy and everything will work itself out.

That's my "Dr Phil" moment for the day.
Enjoy.

When they forget to put a condom on?

You're never free when you're a parent.
Time, responsibility, money until they're eighteen (probably beyond), worry forever.

Trapped is a state of mind for most people.

LleeLlee said:

Exactly.


I can't recall a time, even going way back to being a young child, when I didn't feel to some extent "trapped". It's nothing to do with school, money, kids, work, exams etc etc it's to do with me and how I deal with the world around me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not permanently depressed or manically negative, I just have that vibe of "one day I'll sort myself out" but never quite get round to it. And I think a lot of people are like that.

And of all the people I know who have kids, I doubt any of them would consider it as something that has metally trapped them - I think quite the opposite; it has freed up their minds and made them a little more comfortable with themselves. Maybe I should have kids...!

I think the lives of most people can be charted - there are definitely life stages, which are partly dictated by biology but mostly by the society that we've created.

I hate the fact we have to earn money - I don't know what the alternative could possibly be, but it's a very arbitrary system.
We spend most of our lives doing things we don't want to do, so we can afford to do the things we do want to do. I sometimes envy those who escape from convention and just tread their own path, despite the risks - who go off and sit on a mountain, eating baked beans and scratching their growing stubble.

I agree there's a very slim window of true freedom for most people, freedom without real consequences - that's a precious thing, it's just a shame you experience it when you're young and don't have much idea of what you're doing or what it might mean down the line!

But then, you know, if you're willing to be brutal about it you can escape from any situation. The barrier might be simply hurting those close to you or financial insecurity, but it can be done.

The risk is that you have to start eating out of dustbins as a result - most people choose the relative security of conformance, with the occasional adrenalin rush of Prince parties.
[Edited 5/19/08 8:21am]

Anxiety said:

like a crash diet?

I believe that we get "trapped" by money, credit and bills.

Sure, I've heard the whole "mo' money, mo' problems" line a thousand times but when I look at it I see it the other way around.

If I could live life debt free (my penultimate goal) I think I'd be better off. I could provide for my family, educate my kids properly, explore the world more often with my family, live in the type of home I want to live in (www.yurtworks.com) and so on.

Now those all seem very selfish but I believe in caring for family first. Needless to say that I would love nothing more than to provide my school district with proper learning materials, play equipment, computers and such. I would want to do something for our veterans returning from overseas to thank them for their sacrifice and support them in their time of need while our government fails them.

Yeah, when I read what I've written here I'm convinced that money is the ultimate trap.

RenHoek said:

and fat

I do feel trapped, but pretty much I'm trapped by my stability. I'm so much happier than I was in my teens & twenties. So I allow myself to be trapped to some extent, because I prefer it that way.

But I don't have kids, so I'm probably less trapped than some people my age. I can still do whatever I want whenever I want, I just usually don't
[Edited 5/19/08 10:40am]

kimrachell said:

If only we all could be Kim

Gosh Johnny, can you imagine the reaction if I posed these questions?

ButterscotchPimp said:

horatio said:

or a new hairstyle!

On one hand, it's as simple as embracing responsibility. Most adults have it. Comes with the territory.

But, on the other hand, if it's a thing of feeling trapped by material things, those can be sold or given away. I'm not trapped by a car and car payment, nor by a house and a mortgage.

One could get rid of all your material possessions, though, and still be irresponsible.

And, that could become another "trap." I talked to a homeless man one day, and after a while, he said: "I know that I need to find work soon. This living on the streets with no job? Part of me ... Part of me is starting to like it..."

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

i must have been in an unusually introspective mood yesterday

ButterscotchPimp said:

nice.very nice

.
[Edited 5/19/08 23:24pm]

bahhhh ... just me
[Edited 5/19/08 23:24pm]

I going to a tropical island and live off of coconuts and fish.
Anyone want to come along?

jonylawson said:

I feel trapped by everything on your list not because i have these problems. but because i dont.I am an explorer see the world as a place to enjoy my fantasies. Everyone wants 2 mold me into a status and put me in a glass box.Kind of like a doll in a glass case. Taken down to look at once in a while,have my box dusted off and put back on the shelf. a place for everything and everything in its place.

30peacessilver said:

cool

I actually don't feel trapped at all. I feel like I have more choices than I can bear. I have a recipe of setting out my dreams and then finding ways to act on them, no matter how outlandish they seem to be. My biggest trap is myself. Self-discipline is the opposite of being trapped and I am always trying to find more of it.