Q: How many atheists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Atheists question whether it's really light anyway.
[This message was edited Fri Nov 1 18:05:47 PST 2002 by AbucahX]
[This message was edited Fri Nov 1 18:07:56 PST 2002 by AbucahX]
[This message was edited Fri Nov 1 18:12:12 PST 2002 by AbucahX]

AbucahX said:

That didn't make sense, but I still like you.

IceNine said:

LOL.

Holiday for Atheists

An atheist complained to a Christian friend, "Christians have
their special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter; and Jews
celebrate their holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur;
Muslims have their holidays. EVERY religion has its holidays.

But we atheists," he said, "have no recognized holidays. It's
an unfair discrimination."

"What do you mean, atheists have no holidays," his friend replied,
"People have been observing a special day in your honor for years."

"I don't know what you're talking about," the atheist said, "When
is this special day honoring atheists?"

"April first."

way to copy and paste!

If atheists say there is no God, who do they think pops up the next Kleenex in the box?

Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

Thecherryloon said:

Of course i'm copying and pasting.

AbucahX said:

what's wrong with original thought? oh i forgot you must be a follower!

Thecherryloon said:

A follower of what?

AbucahX said:

"There is no light."

That should be the real answer!

AbucahX said:

What's an atheist's favorite Christmas movie?

Coincidence on 34th Street.

AbucahX said:

The lord.The bearded one.(not George Lucas, the other bearded one)

AbucahX said:

AbucahX said:

I bet you don't even get that joke.c'mon enlighten me!

An atheist is someone who has no one to talk to when they have an orgasm.

Thecherryloon said:

Dude, don't take it serious.

Thecherryloon said:

Yes, I do get the joke by the way.

AbucahX said:

Depends if you're god's called dirty bitch or not!

AbucahX said:

well it's been five minutes since you posted it.Maybe one of the god squad clued you up.

"How Many Atheists Does It Take To Screw In A Light Bulb?"

Answer: All of them! ONE to screw in the light bulb and 300 million to hold back all the theists trying to stop him because they want to remain in the dark!

AbucahX said:

these are really cute! Where did you find them? BTW, do yout think I'm an atheist because of the thread I posted?

applekisses said:

nah, i didn't think or care that you were atheist, I just thought that the thread wasn't funny. I found the jokes on internet..do a search and you'll find some good ones.

Q: Why can't atheists eat fish and chips?
A: Because they don't believe in cod.

AbucahX said:

that is just...terrible

Thecherryloon said:

Who is the God squad?

Q: What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness and an Athiest?

A: A person knocking on your door for no apparant reason!

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing on Loch Ness when suddenly his boat was attacked by the famous monster. With one flick of its tail, the monster launched him and his boat up into the air. Then it opened its massive jaw to swallow both. As the man tumbled through the air, he cried out... "Oh my God!!! Help Me!" At once the whole scene froze, and as the atheist hung there in mid air a booming voice came from the dark rain-clouds, "I thought you didn't believe in me!"

"Come on God, give me a break... please!!!", the atheist pleaded, "I didn't believe in the Loch Ness monster either, until just now..."

A militant atheist accosted a minister as he walked down the street. "This eternal life - it's a load of rubbish! I believe only in survival of the fittest, and when we die, that's it! We're finished. We cease to exist! When I die I am utterly convinced that will be the end of me." The minister rolled his eyes and sighed, "Thank God for that."