When I was a kid I thought I was like a mutant or something. I could never pin point what it was exactly that ( I thought) made me different from other kids, but I just thought that I somehow looked drastically different from how a human should look. I guess I was a little wacky ( still am). God bless the org, because I've never told anyone that before and now I'm telling everyone.
As for how I feel about myself now, yeah most days I still think I'm ugly.
On my very best days all I feel is "presentable".But I think, both how I felt then and how I feel now are more reflections of how I see me in general, not just my appearance. Basicly, I'm self hating all around.

Sweeny79 said:

Yes, it's true, it's true. This is a common problem for people. I know in the past, I didn't want to go outside because of the way I looked. It was pretty bad. I suffered from low self-esteem, anorexia, all that stuff before. I was skinny as a rail one time, and thought I was orca fat. I lost the weight, but my perception of myself hadn't changed one bit. I use to make myself sick over it. It was pretty bad. I didn't want to mingle with the outside world for fear that people would see all my flaws. I was and still am, my own worst critic. When you have people in your life, be it family or otherwise, that tell you that you are fat and ugly, you start to believe it. It is still an issue for me now, just not as bad. I think of myself as ugly anymore, because I'm not. I have pretty eyes, lips, skin complexion, nice hair, and a set of hooters that could put your eyes out. After all, how can you expect someone to love you, if you don't love yourself. I read a quote from the 1994 Inaugural Speech spoken by Nelson Mandela(actually written by Marianne Williams) that changed my life. It asked the question,"Who am I not to be beautiful, talented and gorgeous?" I've had girls come up to me and say,"I'm not gay, but you're gorgeous!" I'm not the size I prefer to be, but I can still pull men of all races. I am more confident, but definitely not conceited. I hate people like that. So I am doing a whole lot better!!

I think I'm ugly, and Laurel will confirm this.

I think it's because I used to be clinically overweight, and then lost it all. Inside I still have that fat person mentality and always see myself as fat, regardless of the fact that I've lost weight.

Spookymuffin said:

Really?


Pics. Now.

Spookymuffin said:

it makes me want to smack you sometimes because you're so heartstoppingly gorgeous to me. but yeah.

evenstar said:

Yeah. He is a cutie for sure. Oh and if you don't mind me saying so...


His voice...


OK...back to your regular programming.

REDFEATHERS said:

Mean ass...

pardonme4livin said:

You aren't ugly Ken.

hokie said:

hokie said:

Awwwww.... thank you....

In my teens I was ugly. Zits, brace face, insecure, the whole 9 yards. In my twenties I surprised myself. I would exercize and my body was well developed. The zits went away and my face grew into somewhat of a handsome fellow. These days I hardly work out and when I see people in their twenties I remember the good old days when I was more attractive.
[Edited 4/2/08 15:11pm]

Spookymuffin said:

I've seen that before and I thought that was your little brother. I'm not because I think you are a super fatso by the way.


You're still cute.

hokie said:

I wish I had photos from the shoulders down. I was a fatty.

Spookymuffin said:

I've not had a problem with being too heavy. But I was underweight for a very long time. This is the heaviest I've ever been!

When I finished college I was 105 pounds.

hokie said:

I hardly recognise myself in that old photo. It's so weird. I wanna be young again.

Spookymuffin said:

See! just like my big headed snaggle toothed 65 pound retarded hobit of a self! That shit never leaves

Spookymuffin said:

Me too. I'm going to be 35 this year.

hokie said:

38!

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

You look fine. Please.

hokie said:

I'm gonna be 38 too....

pardonme4livin said:

Well I already hit it and the world doesn't end.....not yet

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Spookymuffin said:

it's still hard to have an accurate sense of what i look like because i was an overweight kid growing up. i lost most of my weight during high school and i lost even more of it in my adult years, to the point where i now am "rationally" aware that i qualify as a skinny bitch...but i still see and feel traces of the fat kid i used to be. i don't think it really effects my self-image that much these days - i think i'm an okay enough looking guy - but sometimes the way i feel doesn't match up with what i see in the mirror, and sometimes neither of those things match up with the way other people describe me. it's more of a mindfuck than anything else.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

You cats are upset about pushing 40? Please....I'm three years away from 50. Y'all are nuts.

Stymie said:

I wish I had your confidence.

I often feel I am quite ugly. I don't feel like I have a feminine enough face and unfortunately I had to be the child to look like my father (he's ugly by the way). I have dark eyes, dark hair, horrible cheeks, bad skin and a large hook nose. Guys have even yelled to me "sick body, shame about the face". It really gets me down sometimes. I would like to have the cute button nose, light eyes and high cheekbones .

I fear that I am insufficient in the looks department to get a German man.

hokie said:

pfft, you know i don't mind. i like watching girls check him out and then smirking at them

See, I know I'm ugly. But I'm better looking than I used to be, so I do have a little bit of confidence, and I've even been taking pictures of myself (and uploading them to my myspace ) to get used to the idea of looking at myself and seeing what's attractive about me.


And though I'm ugly, I do have a certain sex appeal that some people seem to like. It's strange, really. I don't get it, but if they do, then that's fine with me