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PrintableWhat's the big deal? If I had the better paying job and he wanted to be the primary care giver, I don't see anything wrong with it.
However, I think it would be really hard for me to not stay home, at least for a bit, with a newborn or young baby. | |
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JasmineFire said: paintedlady said: I was in this situation where we had two children together, I had more earning potential (making twice as much as him) and yes, I wanted him to stay home,since the childcare was so expensive, we were not keeping up with our expenses,.. but he wouldn't.
We split up and now he bitches about paying for child support while I work a seasonal job and stay at home with the kids.  well then he really needed to step his game up if he expected you to stay home when you were the one making the money.
i know that this isn't politically correct but i really don't know how i would deal with a man who was making a significant amount less than me. i guess it's just a hang up of mine. I fell in love with a broke azz man.... he was cute and a friend since we were 11, and yes he approached me at a vulnerable moment in my life. 
NEVER AGAIN! | |
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My man stayed at home (or shall I say in the family store) with my firstborn while I worked for a little while. It made sense for us at the time. It would have been financially foolish to do it the other way around. His decision was an act of love and sacrifice. He never lost his friggin mind and tried to tell me he would never work another day in his life. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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Dance said: So you've got your career going and then you meet Mr. Right, you get engaged, and you have a family chat
He tells you that he wants to quit his job and be a stay at home dad and raise a crumbsnatcher and probably never work the rest of his life. He expects you to take care of the finances. YOU SAY Why not? It worked for my parents. And if I happen to have the better paying job anyways or the Mr. is more parentally inclined than I, I see no reason not to.  "A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" | |
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Flowerz said: Dance said: What if he's really good with kids, great at fixing stuff, and has a bit of Emeril Lagasse in him?
Still hell no? all wonderful qualities and added bonuses.. if he's that good in the kitchen, he can start his own business  .. anything productive.. ill support him .. So who's looking after the kids, then? "A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" | |
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Okay, maybe I'm the weird one here, but why are the majority of you balking at the idea? It's no different than a family where the guy works and the woman stays home with the offspring. How come it's good parenting when the woman wants to stay home with the kids, but "laziness" if the man wants to? And what's the problem with the girl making more money than the guy?
You people make no goddamned sense.  "A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" | |
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meow85 said: Okay, maybe I'm the weird one here, but why are the majority of you balking at the idea? It's no different than a family where the guy works and the woman stays home with the offspring. How come it's good parenting when the woman wants to stay home with the kids, but "laziness" if the man wants to? And what's the problem with the girl making more money than the guy?
You people make no goddamned sense. I wouldn't balk, if I earned that kind of money he could be a rockstar | |
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If I made enough....yep...go for what ya know.
I'm not staying home... | |
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Dance said: So you've got your career going and then you meet Mr. Right, you get engaged, and you have a family chat
He tells you that he wants to quit his job and be a stay at home dad and raise a crumbsnatcher and probably never work the rest of his life. He expects you to take care of the finances. YOU SAY 
I am looking for a househusband right this very moment. | |
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jess555ja said: Dance said: So you've got your career going and then you meet Mr. Right, you get engaged, and you have a family chat
He tells you that he wants to quit his job and be a stay at home dad and raise a crumbsnatcher and probably never work the rest of his life. He expects you to take care of the finances. YOU SAY 
I say hell to da naw. I could understand if it was a couple of years, say before our child/children started school, but never work again for the rest of his life?! No | |
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Dance said: So you've got your career going and then you meet Mr. Right, you get engaged, and you have a family chat
He tells you that he wants to quit his job and be a stay at home dad and raise a crumbsnatcher and probably never work the rest of his life. He expects you to take care of the finances. YOU SAY even though this situation did not work out for me I still don't have a problem with it. I think it actually would be a load off of my back. | |
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I've already got one!
He cleans, he cooks, he is home after school. It's awesome! | |
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I'm all for role reversal as much as the next women but to a point. I don't personally know any men and this includes my most "metro" of metro male buds that would be okay with this type of arrangement. Not for the rest of their lives and for her to pay all the bills. | |
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JasmineFire said: i know that this isn't politically correct but i really don't know how i would deal with a man who was making a significant amount less than me. i guess it's just a hang up of mine.
It's a HUGE hang up of men's too. | |
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gemini13 said: I've already got one!
He cleans, he cooks, he is home after school. It's awesome! see thats love  | |
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I would probably say, "Hmmm...okay. Here's the compromise. I'll take a one-year leave of absence from my job and you'll work for the first year after the baby is born...so I can do the nursing/bonding thing. After that, if you really want to stay at home, that's fine - as long as the house is clean, the laundry is done, and I have a hot dinner waiting when I get home. You will also be the one getting up in the middle of the night if the child is sick/hungry/thirsty/whatever.
When the child goes to school, you are back in the workforce, too. From that point on, we split duties with respect to staying home when s/he's sick." We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves. | |
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heybaby said: gemini13 said: I've already got one!
He cleans, he cooks, he is home after school. It's awesome! see thats love | |
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that wouldn't work for most women...'cause the poor bastard couldn't pay child support when she leaves his Mr. Mom ass... | |
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Genesia said: I would probably say, "Hmmm...okay. Here's the compromise. I'll take a one-year leave of absence from my job and you'll work for the first year after the baby is born...so I can do the nursing/bonding thing. After that, if you really want to stay at home, that's fine - as long as the house is clean, the laundry is done, and I have a hot dinner waiting when I get home. You will also be the one getting up in the middle of the night if the child is sick/hungry/thirsty/whatever.
When the child goes to school, you are back in the workforce, too. From that point on, we split duties with respect to staying home when s/he's sick." THAT would be doable! | |
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Try this shoe on!!
Man dominates world. Oppresses women. Women rise up! Woman no longer wants the stigma of Housewife, demands rights and jobs and equal pay. Man gives woman a job and a salary..... Then creates the daycare industry.....raises the cost to excrutiating prices! Now man and woman MUST work! No time for family as it once was..... Burn ya bra!!  The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
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DexMSR said: Try this shoe on!!
Man dominates world. Oppresses women. Women rise up! Woman no longer wants the stigma of Housewife, demands rights and jobs and equal pay. Man gives woman a job and a salary..... Then creates the daycare industry.....raises the cost to excrutiating prices! Now man and woman MUST work! No time for family as it once was..... Burn ya bra!! so... you think paying for and the cost of daycare is the reason why the standard of living has risen so far beyond, say, the 1950's when one income could still comfortably support a family?  |
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CarrieMpls said: DexMSR said: Try this shoe on!!
Man dominates world. Oppresses women. Women rise up! Woman no longer wants the stigma of Housewife, demands rights and jobs and equal pay. Man gives woman a job and a salary..... Then creates the daycare industry.....raises the cost to excrutiating prices! Now man and woman MUST work! No time for family as it once was..... Burn ya bra!! so... you think paying for and the cost of daycare is the reason why the standard of living has risen so far beyond, say, the 1950's when one income could still comfortably support a family? Of course not entirely...but you see my point. The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
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meow85 said: Okay, maybe I'm the weird one here, but why are the majority of you balking at the idea? It's no different than a family where the guy works and the woman stays home with the offspring. How come it's good parenting when the woman wants to stay home with the kids, but "laziness" if the man wants to? And what's the problem with the girl making more money than the guy?
You people make no goddamned sense. it's about a dude never working expecting the female to do all the finances .. a baby sitter can care for the kids while both work... and I previously commented about if the dude is laid off..that's a different scenario.. [Edited 3/13/08 0:16am] | |
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as long as I come home to a clean house, happy kid and a hot meal, I'm down.
and as long as he keeps himself up, you know, doesn't walk around in a robe and slippers all day, doesn't get fat.. etc etc. Sounds like good arrangement. Lord knows I don't wanna be the one to stay home with the rugrats. | |
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Flowerz said: meow85 said: Okay, maybe I'm the weird one here, but why are the majority of you balking at the idea? It's no different than a family where the guy works and the woman stays home with the offspring. How come it's good parenting when the woman wants to stay home with the kids, but "laziness" if the man wants to? And what's the problem with the girl making more money than the guy?
You people make no goddamned sense. it's about a dude never working expecting the female to do all the finances .. a baby sitter can care for the kids while both work... and I previously commented about if the dude is laid off..that's a different scenario.. [Edited 3/13/08 0:16am] But plenty of women never have a paid job and stay home as housewives forever. No one's spouting problems with that, and it's the exact same thing. If that's what works for a couple, what's the issue? [Edited 3/13/08 1:02am] "A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" | |
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