Men should charge her, for their services.....

blackguitaristz said:

Would you two PLEASE knock it off? You're interupting my flow!!!!!

#8 or #9, whichever the case may be:
"When you arrive at the door, come with a hard on and ring the doorbell with your dick".

xplnyrslf said:

yeah.. she messed that up, but she's on target with #3. and #6 - dirty talk only (only the top part of #6)
[Edited 3/1/08 16:04pm]

gypsyfire said:

CalhounSq said:

One4All4Ever said:

Gypsyfire :"Yes,but there is a such thing as being TOO aggressive,I don't want to be rammed into so hard that I feel like you're trying to hurt me.
Just sayin."

Here's a thought:


http://www.urologyhealth....?topic=112

What are the causes and symptoms of penile injury?

The penis is much less frequently injured than other parts of the body such as the abdomen, legs, arms and head. However, it can be wounded as a result of various injuries, including automobile accidents, gunshot wounds, burns sexual activity and, in the case of mental disturbance, self-mutilation.

Perhaps the most common injury to the penis occurs during sexual activity. In the flaccid state, injury to the penis is rare because of the mobility and flexibility of the organ. During an erection, arterial blood flow causes the penis to be come rigid thus placing it at higher risk for injury. Although there is no bone in the penis, urologists frequently refer to the injury as a penile "fracture." During vigorous thrusting, the erect penis may accidentally slip out of the vagina. Due to the fast action, the penis strikes the outside of the woman instead of being reinserted into the vagina. The penis may then bend sharply despite the erection. A typical sign of this problem is a sharp pain in the penis joined by a "popping" sound. The pain and sound are produced by a rupture of the tunica albuginea, which is stretched tightly during the time of an erection. The pain may last for a short time or it may continue. The penis develops a collection of blood under the skin called a hematoma, which can distort the appearance of the penis (eggplant deformity). The injury is usually limited to one or both of the corpora cavernosa and, on rare occasions, the urethra.

The penis can also be injured by tearing the suspensory ligament, the structure that supports the organ at its base. Attached to the pelvic bone, this ligament can rip if an erect penis is pushed down suddenly causing pain and bleeding.
[Edited 3/1/08 18:31pm]

CalhounSq said:

yay for men who do all of this without being told.

xplnyrslf said:

One4All4Ever said:

So who's never gonna get what? I don't want anything from anyone here


[Edited 3/1/08 16:21pm]

CalhounSq said:

CalhounSq said:

xplnyrslf said:

My friend says this happens them frequently, but not quite that severe. Never happened to me though

One4All4Ever said:

Emoticon Switches are evil!!

Dance said:

Damn, I did the same face and i'm not even a dude. Although I did laugh a bit.

Now! Let's discuss the treatment:(from the same link)
"Historically, treatment for a penis fractured during sexual activity was non-surgical management (e.g., cold compresses, pressure dressings, penile splinting and anti-inflammatory medications). Today, the treatment of choice will probably be for the individual to undergo surgery since it has the best long-term results by lowering complication rates often linked to non-surgical approaches. The most common surgical technique is to "deglove" the penis by making a cut around the shaft near the glans penis and peeling back the skin to the base to examine the inner surface. The surgeon will then evacuate any hematoma that helps to make examination of any tears in the tunica albuginea easier. If tears exist, they are repaired before the skin is sewn back into position. A Foley catheter may be placed through the penile urethra into the bladder to drain urine and allow the penis to heal. With the entire penis bandaged, the patient will probably remain in the hospital for one or two days, and go home with or without the catheter. They may be given antibiotics and pain medication and will probably be asked to make a followup office visit with their doctor."

I posted the info because of Gypsyfire's post she didn't want to feel rammed into, or hurt. Men have risks, too! Much worse, with the wrong angle!
[Edited 3/1/08 18:34pm]

Has it occurred to anyone, the author of this Craiglist item, is really a man???

xplnyrslf said:

could be....

Volitan said:

It has "farce" written all over it. And I emphasize:


Date: 2008-02-03, 3:29PM PST


Dear Men of Craigslist,

Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.

But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but We'dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We've done dinner and drinks. We've gone dancing. We've cuddled and watched a movie. I'm wearing a low cut shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.

When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck me. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved. But don't make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We've been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That's nice, but it's time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don't make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I'm practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won't go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don't gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It's not what WE want.

OK, I know it's scary. There are lots of women out there who make fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don't think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to fuck like men:

sp ck edit
[Edited 3/1/08 21:54pm]

DEAD GIVEAWAY!

xplnyrslf said:

I don't think those are dead give aways....

Volitan said:

Hokay! more emphasis as above. the squigley stuff.
This person thinks like a MAN!
I could highlight the entire proposition.


"low cut shirt", alone....women don't refer to their tops as a SHIRT!
top, blouse, tee, bustier,,,,
[Edited 3/1/08 22:13pm]

OK. I'll highlight the whole darn thing. This is not a woman's voice.


Date: 2008-02-03, 3:29PM PST


Dear Men of Craigslist,

Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.

But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We've done dinner and drinks. We've gone dancing. We've cuddled and watched a movie. I'm wearing a low cut shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.

When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck me. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved. But don't make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We've been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That's nice, but it's time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don't make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I'm practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won't go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don't gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It's not what WE want.

OK, I know it's scary. There are lots of women out there who make fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don't think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to fuck like men:

Volitan said:

I checked your profile. You're a man.

xplnyrslf said:

why can't it be a woman?

xplnyrslf said:

That's a huge generalization To be honest I was gonna forward this to a friend of mine & ask if she wrote it b/c it sounds just like her & I know she dicks around on Craigslist sometimes

It may not sound like you/your friends/women you know, but I have no problem believing a woman wrote this. She's spot on in some parts...


.
[Edited 3/1/08 22:29pm]

evenstar said:

Male fantasy. Entirely.
SHIRT?????

xplnyrslf said:

What the hell?? I say "shirt" all the time. Never "blouse" b/c I generally don't wear frilly/goofy shit unless I'm in the bedroom... "tee" - never, "top" - sometimes... & who the fuck is wearing bustiers??