SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Well, spending a bazillion dollars on a wedding is silly to me too. Why should anyone, let alone the bride's family, pay for that?

I could also argue, it's way less a status symbol for a woman, but the man who paid for it, not to mention he's giving her something to wear as a brand of ownership. Hand's off fellas, this lady is spoken for.

I agree, if a woman won't get married without a bank-breaking rock, it's superficial and sad. But I do enjoy the tradition and find nothing wrong with jewelry that expresses a commitment to one another.

heartbeatocean said:

How would you ever know it wasn't a diamond??? Appraisal or glass cutting. Which is it?

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I think it's a primal thing though. It's built into us, and not weird at all.

I mean, some birds win a mate through song, or dance, or even the quality of the nest they build. Other animals do all manner of things to win over their mates.

A ring, likewise is the same kind of gesture--something that shows you totally worked your ass off to earn her. Though 10k is rather...erm...expensive , there's alot to be said about showing the girl you cared enough to impress her this way. And I seriously think most women don't necessarily feel they NEED that expensive rock, but it' doesn't change that deep seeded primal feeling that she's been properly courted.

It's natural I think.

Shiiiiit, gimme the ring but DO NOT tell me it's a fucking cubic zirconia The one time I was proposed to I never got the ring appraised, & I didn't even wanna marry this guy But I would have felt strange testing it like that. All that matters is the ring was given...

I just don't see myself ever getting a ring appraised or asking how much was spent on it, b/c then I'll get all caught up in my feelings about the ring itself. & it ain't about the ring, it's about if I wanna marry his punk ass or not.

But don't fucking tell me

CarrieMpls said:

Less a status symbol for women?! you should have seen the gaggle of hens crowing about this chicks gigantic rock in the elevator here at work not to long ago It's ALL STATUS for women. Which is why many would not be happy with symoblism or any piece of jewelry to express commitment.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Maybe 2 years down the road he's lost his job and they're deep in debt and she decides to see if she can pawn it to pay the bills?



Either way, starting a commitment together with a lie attached is a bad, bad idea.

But what about the children?

If women stop accepting diamonds rings,
won't that put some poor kids working in an African diamond-mine out of work?
[Edited 2/25/08 18:22pm]

CarrieMpls said:

OK men, NEVER LOSE YOUR JOB!

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I guess I don't know any of the women you do, and you don't know any of the women I do. I can't think of a single woman who would turn down a marriage proposal for someone not giving the perfect ring.

CarrieMpls said:

Well I am in LA afterall. I don't do the Joneses thing but most of society here does! Maybe the Minnesotan chicks are more reasonable. You are so I guess it could be true

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

And there's your problem.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Because I would make such a stink that he bought me a huge diamond in the first place. I can't go around wearing a huge diamond, I'd rather have the cash. He would eventually confess to appease me and...BUSTED.

CarrieMpls said:

Screw getting us a ring, we don't need that crap. How old fashioned.
















What we really need is a brand new luxury car. That's how you prove your love right there.

heartbeatocean said:

what if you found out it was a diamond but he said it was zirconia?

Anxiety said:

Anxiety said:

That would freak me out even more. My last relationship was actually like that. My significant other would fabricate things all the time for no apparent reason. I never could get to the bottom of his lies, because they seemed so pointless.

JustErin said:

An unbreakable bond made with the hardest elements known to man. A symbol that nothing will break our bond for the rest of our lives. In fact the diamond will be around long after we're gone but will always be the symbol of our love.

I'm going to throw up now...

Slave2daGroove said:

Is this because my thread made you realize this?

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

credit card statement will give it away right there.

I never got a ring when we got engaged, my wedding band cost $30 BUT for my 35th birthday (also roughly 10 years since we met) I got a diamond ring. It was an incredibly romantic gesture because it was UNEXPECTED. It is small, and I did check the statement to make sure he got a good deal I would have been mad if it was big and he dipped into the mortgage to buy it

On the other hand I have a necklace my grandma gave me, which they told me was a "brilliant" not a diamond. What is that?

if my SigOth got me a big cake in the shape of a diamond ring, i would be so much happier than if i actually were given a ring. i've never been big on jewelry; meanwhile, i freakin LOVE cake om nom nom

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

No, it's because I'm so romantic that I feel like I'm writing a Romance novel sometimes and I'm a guy.

Supa why does this bother you so much? didn't you make a thread about this before?

any way the ring is not important. Its the relationship and commitment that you give to one another (for anybody who is for marriage I guess) and If the man gets a ring and feels he has to lie about the validity of it then the relationship was a sham from the get go and he needs to find a woman whom he doesn't feel he has to lie to. Like Carrie said lying period is not a good way to start off a marriage or serious relationship for that matter.

ZombieKitten said:

Yea, but if you're not married yet the finances may not be shared @ that point, even if you're living together. I wouldn't look through his statements to find out... I don't think

Richard, your wedding ring opinions I love it!

CalhounSq said:

very true though we were living together and in our case finances were already shared since we bought a house together a year before we got engaged.

CalhounSq said:

yeah thats pretty creepy. I'd be pissed if it was done to me

A few observations...


1) Supes, how many women do you plan on proposing to?

2) The rings have very little value in pawn stores. The racket is that they retain their value in jewelry stores, and really only in the interests of having the dude trade up and pay at least twice the value of the original ring. If you keep up with twice-yearly cleanings...

3) The rings are for the woman... beyond a man's declaring he's willing to plunk down some serious cash for what the ring represents, which is usually a real interesting place to realize you've arrived, as a man...

it's also about making sure she doesn't feel dishonored around other women... because other women can trip on what you've placed on her finger. And, older women (mamas, aunts, sorors, etc.) generally can spot a good ring at first glance (without a jeweler's loupe ) and clue in the woman in question. And they will.

ThreadBare said:

Understood but this is where some women mess up. They worry too much about what the crew thinks. Understood but too bad.