DexMSR said:

IMHO, yes.

DexMSR said:

NEED....no but to me there's nothing wrong with an outward display of an inward committment. I think that's all marriage is to ME without getting into the legal stuff. If you've deemed your relationship "sacred", to me marriage should be such a scary thing.

RodeoSchro said:

So you are relying on the fact that you are Married to now be committed?

Is it not the committment..not the act...that makes it work? If that were the case...there would be no divorces....??

shellyevon said:

We dont need no piece of paper
From the city hall
Keeping us tied and true

I really don't want to defile the sanctity of your new relationship but

R-E-D-U-N-D-A-N-T & MANIPULATIVE RIDICULOUSNESS!

Like religion, it's sacred if that's what you believe.

Not for me, though I might be willing to have a party to celebrate my love for the right person.

HamsterHuey said:

So. Marriage.
The way we view marriage now is too silly for words.
Most see it as a christian institution, sacred union. Please.
Even though I think that some might feel that way for a short while in thei lives, most people entering into marriage do so for the wrong reasons.

In the days of freedom (at least in the west) there is so much freedom a sacred union becomes redundant, just because of the influences we encounter in every day life. We are raised with certain values that do not add up anymore. Most of the western world is de-religionised, some countries (u know what country I am talking about) are just too damn' hypocrite in their politics to come clean.
Our new gods are now consumerism, materialism and hunting for lifestyles and self-images that are unattainable, setting millions on the path of depression.
We quickly colonise this planet to death and in this way lost all touch of nature, the life force that gave us life, the life force that made our over imaginative minds create countless gods throughout the ages.

Now we are exploring the very edges of life through science, we have become a huge, mindless hive that tap in to the lifestyle of the Britney's and Winehouse's becuase they have lost touch with what it is all about.
But being out of touch with nature is also denying us the close link living things have with their natural surroundings. The animal in us is missing the wind in their hair and the rain on our faces.
We have placed ourselves above nature and the old gods won't do. The cristian sacred union (please!) is a hollow institution.

This is where my previous words from a Joni Mitchell song come in. Who needs a paper?
All you need is trust. To look into someone's eyes and SEE that they want to be with you. To trust that they will be there for you. And sure, some people will have their trust violated.
That's life. It makes you stronger. It gets you back in touch with yourself and in this way, maybe, also back in touch with nature.

DiminutiveRocker said:

Good parenting depends on individuals, mature individuals who are willing to set their own egos aside, it sounds like your brother and his partner are doing a great job. Their relationship works for them, 25 years is to be celebrated. Bad parents can be married or unmarried.
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[Edited 2/15/08 12:13pm]

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Dont worry, it would take a lot more to defile the sanctity of my new relationship than that



yes some marriages are ridiculous and so are some relationships, as for manipulation its not exclusive to marriage you know

It's never been sacred. Not to long ago, women got married because they had to. They had no rights. Wealthy and powerful families arranged marriages between their children for status. None of that was sacred. It's not redundant either. Those who want to make a commitment should make it by getting married. No sense in being an unpaid whore, male or female

Janfriend said:

Stymie said:

If you do that too often you'l hurt yourself.

Stymie said:

Always happy to amuse you

Stymie said:

But Marriage does not mean Committment...or am I wrong? If it did...NO ONE WOULD DIVORCE!

DexMSR said:

We all know that just because you get married doesn't mean you're committed but it doesn't mean that marriage is a bad thing for those who want to express their committment through marriage.

DexMSR said:

We all know that just because you get married doesn't mean you're committed but it doesn't mean that marriage is a bad thing for those who want to express their committment through marriage.

DexMSR said:

That's true... but divorces are messier than simple breakups (legal problems, custody problems, financial etc...). So there is an incentive to stay married...

DexMSR said:

imo, marriage is more of a commitment than living together, if done for the rights reasons and if one's mindset is not just "for now." The process to just breaking up is much easier than divorcing. With that said, it should be much more difficult to get married

DexMSR said:

The act of marriage should create the committment. The words, "'Til death do us part" ought to do the trick. Maintaining the committment is hard work.

Some people marry the wrong person. Some people aren't up to the task of working through differences.

Stymie said:

She is the love of my life.

When you finally meet the person you know is right, you just know.

Now if I can just keep my dick in my pants and not fuck this up, the institution will be complete.

As far as the commitment, I've never cheated but now that I'm signing up to one person for the rest of my life, having sex with one person forever kind of freaks me out.

Not really sure why, most of my years of being single weren't much more than me and my hand anyway...

RodeoSchro said:

Some people shouldn't be married despite mimicing a demanded phrase during the ceremony.

Slave2daGroove said:

I kept throwing it at you and you kept ducking.

I'm gonna speak for a school of thought that does hold marriage as a sacred pact.

Jesus said He hated divorce.

Throughout the Bible, Christ is described as a Groom Who will return for His Bride, the global Church of Christ, folks reconciled to God by His shed blood, all hinging on His resurrection and what He accomplished through it (John 3:16).

So, with the model of marriage a recurring theme throughout the Bible, one finds the pattern of covenant. Those defined by the Bible as being Christians have entered into a covenant with God, a binding agreement.

That's what makes marriage so important to Christians, the fact that you've entered into a binding covenant with another human being, vowing to love them above all other humans until death parts you two. Within Christian communities, the charge to the husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the Church, sacrificially as Christ sacrificed Himself for humanity. It's love covering a multitude of sins. It's two people saying, "I won't give up on you, because Christ sure hasn't given up on me. I'm in it for good, baby."

It's the earthly reflection of a redemptive, forgiving love that has your spouse's best interests at heart, that requires work and toil and a willingness to humble yourself and love them past their faults and your own, past their crazy relatives and scars and quirks. It's something else. I hope to be in a good, healthy example of it one day.

My




.
[Edited 2/15/08 17:37pm]

ThreadBare said:

But Christians doing the divorce thing too.

Stymie said:

Yup. But that has no bearing on me or my approach.

I once dated a woman whose scrambled eggs were horrible. Couldn't even finish the things.

But I still cook eggs well in my own kitchen.

It's stupid

ThreadBare said:

I know I was just messin' with ya.

Stymie said:

Oh, I saw ya from a mile off...

ThreadBare said:

yeah.....this all be true....even though very few follow any of this.