And he/she did not return the feeling? Man, that sucks. Had to tell my best friend on New Year's Eve that I wanted more. Not that I really expected her to return the feelings, but her ex-boyfriend came by, told her the same and although I did not want to, I had to let it out. I think she really could not believe what was happening, because she really did not notice any of it. Now we're being really reasonable about it, acting like the adults we're supposed to be, seeing each other and doing what we always did, blablabla. But I cannot deal with her not being here all the time and someday I will have to bring it all up again and then I will really damage our friendship. Feel like a 14-year-old writing this on an internet message board, but what the hell.
So, any of this happened to you? What happened?

It didn't happen to me, but 2 of my best friends fell in love with me some years ago. One of them became my bf later, the other one is still one of my closest friends.
I am sorry that you are dealing with such a situation .

Sorta. I've know this girl for my entire life practically, and have always had a thing for her...but now she's getting married to my best friend soon.....

calldapplwondery83 said:

I cannot begin to tell you how many of my friends I fell in love with or thought I was in love with. I had a gay best friend once and I fell for him hard and I told him and of course the feelings weren't reutrned but I am glad I told him. It took a while but I got over him because I realize how much i wanted him in my life.

I wish you the best of luck.

Volitan said:

That's got to be tough. I'm just waiting for the day now when she will meet someone.

Stymie said:

Thanks. You know, when she finally learned of it, she said how good it is I told her and everything. She also said it will propably be kind of strange to be around each other and she'll be afraid to do somehing wrong. Next couple of days, I couldn't help but think that I really shouldn't have told her - especially because I expected her to not be very happy about it. So it was really more a moment of weakness because I wanted to deal with it myself and not drag her into it. So we had anoher talk, I told her that and she was so understanding and smiled and said it really was the right thing. I felt like confessing.

It's funny to write this down for everyone to read but I somehow want to tell this everyone I meet. Strange.

i did so 15 years ago and i think i'm still in love. it was the first time
i fell in love. really in love. and it stuck.

i told him about as much after waiting for two years and he didn't respond
to it at all. the friendship dragged on for another year or so but it was
never really the same after i'd spilled the beans.

back at that time i took it all quite well but the pain of it was a slow
and dragging one. as i said, here we are, 15 years later and i would trade
every single relationship and every infatuation i've had since then for a
single day of that feeling of being truly in love.

but then again, i'm a nutjob anyway

Yes, with me it was the other way around, he pursued the relationship long enough to win me over. Sometimes love letters, candy and flowers can convey a message beyond words. Good Luck !

It has happened to me and it was torture. I suggest cutting ties with her

a friend fell in love with me, not good

veronikka said:

I have been there!

Not fallen in love. But I totally had feelings for him. It was a mess I learned a lot, though.

babooshleeky said:

it was a long time ago but for whatever reason i still miss him

veronikka said:

this has never happened to me. I don't know if I could handle something painful like that. a break or permanent break should be in order I think. Its not healthy.

veronikka said:

I've fallen for a good friend of mine, but I never told him. It was a while ago and I'm over him right now, but it was difficult having those feelings at that time. He was involved with someone else so I just kept it to myself

It can be really tricky. Especially when your expectations aren't limited to the platonic arena.

Friendships require trust. If the uninterested friend can't trust that the interested friend is coming from a mutually agreed-upon place (especially when advice is concerned), a violation is under way.

Having been on both ends of the equation, I say honesty and its consequences are the best recourse.

calldapplwondery83 said:

Awww! Im sorry. I am kinda in the same situation, however I never told him that I was in love with him. Most likely she probably is going to feel uneasy for a while, but just let things slide and let her take it in. I am also re cooperating from a friend whom after 7 years told me that he was gay too and in love with me and I totally stopped speaking to him for a while because I was scared and I thought he was straight.

Now I feel a little bit better but I still feel kinda off. That may not be how she feels but I was just speaking from experience. I hope all goes well

Yes, but he was straight, so what could I do.

But the first person I ever truly felt in love with ended up being my best friend, and still is. Best friend I've ever had.

Raze said:

That is one of the sweetest things I've ever heard

Yes,that's happened a couple of times 2 me,both with less than desirable results.
[Edited 1/26/08 21:47pm]

jess555ja said:

I doubt I could ever tell a friend that I had fallen in love with them

calldapplwondery83 said:

My feelings for her come and go, sometimes it gets really bad, and sometimes, she's just like a regualr friend

IstenSzek said:

Janfriend said:

No. I cannot do that. Then I'd be sure that I killed our friendship. We're really best friends. I'd rather be around her some of the time and try to act reasonable.

The only good thing about it really is that you feel inspired to write songs and lyrics. Most music really seems to come from a place of sadness, not happyness.

yes and thank God he lives in Chicago so that we can still remain best friends