...can you poop in a public bathroom when there is someone pooping in the stall right next to you? smelling someone's nether regions and all. foul sounds and such. even us anally types have limitations.

i'm especially curious to hear what hokie,or should i say jill, has to say about all of this madness.

hmmm?

no problem.

Never have.....and if I can help it, never will. I don't even like pissing in public bathrooms, but I have no choice to do that.

I would rather not...but I'd rather not shit my pants as well, so if I must I'll shit in unison with others in the public restroom...

roodboi said:

i'd expect an answer like that from a hunky man like you.

I take 400 to 600 mg of magnesium every night. That way, I go first thing in the morning, at home, and can minimize my contact with others' "functions" at work.

OMG... even if I have to go really bad or I'm sick to my stomach, I cannot do it if there's other people in the bathroom. I cannot make noise of any kind (farts, shit escaping), I just fucking CAN'T - my ass will clench the fuck UP

So obviously random public bathrooms are automatically off limits - the potential is just too embarrassing. But sometimes a bitch gotta go @ work & I've never been one of those trained mf's who goes every morning after coffee or whatever - my work schedule is always weird so there's no set time for that. At least I have the luxury of working evenings & waiting for the building/people to clear out so I can go in peace

& what's up w/ mf's who can be in a bathroom FULL of people & just fart/shit to their hearts content?? I don't understand that. I can't even fart in the presence of others, let alone take a raging shit


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[Edited 1/21/08 12:11pm]

Nope can't do it! I have problems going in my own bathroom at home.

Ewww...never! I'll pee but that's about it.When I hear farts,grunting,and plopping in the stall next 2 me,I hold my breath and get outta there asap!

MoniGram said:

CalhounSq said:

If you're in a house full of people, then yeah.....I can understand.

CalhounSq said:

I think shes constipated...

AnckSuNamun said:

But if you can't go @ home, where the HELL can you feel cozy while dumping?

roodboi said:

CalhounSq said:

AnckSuNamun said:

Exactly

CalhounSq said:

That could be a question, only Freud could answer.

Keep the toilet lid closed as much as possible and always flush with it closed. That is what I was always told to do...

Oh lawd, I hate public bathrooms, but if I absolutely have to use it, I will and I don't care if someone else is in the next stall.

CalhounSq said:

The only time I go #2 in a public restroom is if I'm about to shit my pants. And if there's someone else in there, I will hold it as much as I can until they leave.

I don't know why it's such a big deal for me. It's just a bodily function that everyone does. No one else at work seems to be afraid of doing it, especially when the office orders Chinese.

I HATE to.
But if you HAVE TO, then the key is to flush the toilet while you are going.

horatio said:

exactly...frees you from noise and smell emabarassment simulatenously...

roodboi said:

Yes BUT public restroom toilets tend to have those super splashy power flushes - I can't have all that mess splashing up on my bits!!!

How to Poop at Work

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brew down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. Memorize these definitions and pooping at work will become a pure pleasure.

ESCAPEE
Definition: a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car and speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with ESCAPEE)
Definition: When forcing poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

COURTESY FLUSH
Definition: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

WALK OF SHAME
Definition: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER
Definition: A colleague who poops at work and damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.

THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN)
Definition: A group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

SAFE HAVENS
Definition: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

TURD BURGLAR
Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

CAMO-COUGH
Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

ASTAIRE
Definition: A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

WATERMELON
Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

HAVANA OMELET
Definition: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.

UNCLE TED
Definition: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

FLY BY
Definition: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

mcmeekle said:

I do the courtesy flush at home, even if I'm the only one there at the time. It's not like I wanna smell it too, you know.

Now I hurt from laughing so much

Thanks

HotPaisleyGirl said:

dont poop your pants

horatio said:

I might just pee them, pooping a morning job

Last time I shit in a public bathroom was in a McDonald's restaurant in Patpong, Bangkok.....I really had to, after a spicy dish of pad thai.....I was pretty disgusting, but I would never have made it to my hotel!