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PrintableWillyWonka said: cynics experience an increased incidence of high blood pressure, heart disease and stroke.
you know, theres no denying valentine's day has become garish and trite, and that its touted (by retailers, mostly...and people with a skewed idea of relationships or what constitutes genuine romantic love) as THE day of the year to declare one's love and to prove that love with extravagent, cliched gifts or activities. but since the day exists anyway as a 'holiday', my opinion is why not have fun with it and make somebody you love feel loved or, at least, somebody you like or appreciate feel liked and/or appreciated? the day doesnt have to be only about raging passion or real-life recreations of overblown, overwrought soap-opera romance - everyone likes to be remembered, or know they are thought of warmly. the essence of v-day can be very sweet if one chooses to eschew the blatant commercialization and aggressive vulgarity, and to celebrate the day in a quiet, heartfelt way - give someone a homemade card or cookies, or a simple bouquet of flowers or even just a friendly hug and a "happy valentines day!" and so theres one day set aside for the celebration of love, or to express affection? just because there is doesnt mean one cant do the same the other 364 days of the year, as well. (but, do you? do most people?) having a certain day designated specifically for the display of love actually makes it easier for the more stoic in nature to share genuine emotion and easier for others to accept, because, on valentines day, its socially "ok" to be emotive and affectionate. and wheres the harm in that? I agree.... so much attention is focused on "bad" stuff like violence and celebrities. Being kind and loving is usually made to look weak. It is a shame really. I think it takes more courage to reach out and show someone love and affection than it does to say or do something mean. Hope you are healing well btw  | |
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HamsterHuey said: WillyWonka said: cynics experience an increased incidence of high blood pressure, heart disease and stroke.
Awright. Just cuz xmas is out there does not make me wanna become christian. It does not mean I shun love cuz I think Valentine's Day is contrived for commercialism, but hey. once you buy into that, why not? why not what? | |
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WillyWonka said: HamsterHuey said: Awright. Just cuz xmas is out there does not make me wanna become christian. It does not mean I shun love cuz I think Valentine's Day is contrived for commercialism, but hey. once you buy into that, why not? why not what? Why not buy a sappy card?  |
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shanti0608 said: Being kind and loving is usually made to look weak.
It is a shame really. I think it takes more courage to reach out and show someone love and affection than it does to say or do something mean. Hope you are healing well btw i agree wholeheartedly. for certain people, its easier to show practically any emotion but love. my norwegian father is the stereotypical purebred scandinavian: reserved, restrained and undemonstrative, especially in regards to the more tender emotions. never in my life have i witnessed my mother and father kiss in anything but a joking, pecking manner, never have i seen them dance or hold hands or tell one another "i love you"; much like children do, as a younger man, my father mainly expressed his affection via teasing - anything more direct was not within his capabilities, though as hes aged he has become more open with his emotions. though its not always been obvious or even evident, my father truly, genuinely loves my mother and always has, and this ive come to realize and understand more and more as ive grown older. and despite his lack of emotionality, my mother, too, knew he loved her. but back to how v-day figures into this. every year, my father, that emotionally cramped man, would trundle to the store and face the crass wasteland of valentines merchandise, and carefully select a card and frilly, lacey heart-shaped box of chocolates for my mother, sometimes flowers too, sign the card simply " Love, -." and present them all to her on valentine's day. sure, those items are cliche. sure, it was just a drugstore card and box of candy or maybe a bouquet of flowers, bought for a contrived 'holiday'. but my mother realized how uncomfortable it normally made my father to reveal his tender side. he took advantage of valentines day as an opportunity to express the affection "expected" of him on that day, and though ive never discussed the subject with him, i know my father enjoyed and was glad of a day on which he could more freely express his love for my mother - even in the less-than-original way that he did. i remember this and its one of the reasons i now still cannot wholly dismiss the valentines day holiday as completely useless or without redeeming value on some level. thank you for the good wishes on my healing, shanti. i hope life is continuing to be wonderful in your new home and new country.  | |
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HamsterHuey said: WillyWonka said: why not what? Why not buy a sappy card? if somebody gets pleasure from giving or receiving a sappy card, yes..why not? | |
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WillyWonka said: if somebody gets pleasure from giving or receiving a sappy card, yes..why not?
You take the fun outa my hate thread.  |
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WillyWonka said: shanti0608 said: Being kind and loving is usually made to look weak.
It is a shame really. I think it takes more courage to reach out and show someone love and affection than it does to say or do something mean. Hope you are healing well btw i agree wholeheartedly. for certain people, its easier to show practically any emotion but love. my norwegian father is the stereotypical purebred scandinavian: reserved, restrained and undemonstrative, especially in regards to the more tender emotions. never in my life have i witnessed my mother and father kiss in anything but a joking, pecking manner, never have i seen them dance or hold hands or tell one another "i love you"; much like children do, as a younger man, my father mainly expressed his affection via teasing - anything more direct was not within his capabilities, though as hes aged he has become more open with his emotions. though its not always been obvious or even evident, my father truly, genuinely loves my mother and always has, and this ive come to realize and understand more and more as ive grown older. and despite his lack of emotionality, my mother, too, knew he loved her. but back to how v-day figures into this. every year, my father, that emotionally cramped man, would trundle to the store and face the crass wasteland of valentines merchandise, and carefully select a card and frilly, lacey heart-shaped box of chocolates for my mother, sometimes flowers too, sign the card simply " Love, -." and present them all to her on valentine's day. sure, those items are cliche. sure, it was just a drugstore card and box of candy or maybe a bouquet of flowers, bought for a contrived 'holiday'. but my mother realized how uncomfortable it normally made my father to reveal his tender side. he took advantage of valentines day as an opportunity to express the affection "expected" of him on that day, and though ive never discussed the subject with him, i know my father enjoyed and was glad of a day on which he could more freely express his love for my mother - even in the less-than-original way that he did. i remember this and its one of the reasons i now still cannot wholly dismiss the valentines day holiday as completely useless or without redeeming value on some level. thank you for the good wishes on my healing, shanti. i hope life is continuing to be wonderful in your new home and new country. I realise that many ppl (mainly men) have been raised to look strong and confident all of the time. I have known many men that have a hard time showing love and affection. I am glad that your father uses the holiday to express his love to your mom. Like I said some times it only takes a small gesture to make some one really happy. I am sure those cards and flowers mean a lot to your mom.
Thank you kind sir | |
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HamsterHuey said: WillyWonka said: if somebody gets pleasure from giving or receiving a sappy card, yes..why not?
You take the fun outa my hate thread.
i hate those horrible, chalky, pepto-bismolish conversation-heart candies sold around valentines day, does that help?
back to the hate, people! | |
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WillyWonka said: HamsterHuey said:
You take the fun outa my hate thread.
i hate those horrible, chalky, pepto-bismolish conversation-heart candies sold around valentines day, does that help?
back to the hate, people! I hate peeps 
 wrong holiday  | |
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shanti0608 said: WillyWonka said:
i hate those horrible, chalky, pepto-bismolish conversation-heart candies sold around valentines day, does that help?
back to the hate, people! I hate peeps
wrong holiday 
the travesty that are peeps deserve year-round hate, so its alright. | |
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WillyWonka said: shanti0608 said: I hate peeps
wrong holiday
the travesty that are peeps deserve year-round hate, so its alright. Agreed 
Give me some dark chocolate...I guess that is why I like Valentine's Day.  | |
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shanti0608 said: WillyWonka said: cynics experience an increased incidence of high blood pressure, heart disease and stroke.
you know, theres no denying valentine's day has become garish and trite, and that its touted (by retailers, mostly...and people with a skewed idea of relationships or what constitutes genuine romantic love) as THE day of the year to declare one's love and to prove that love with extravagent, cliched gifts or activities. but since the day exists anyway as a 'holiday', my opinion is why not have fun with it and make somebody you love feel loved or, at least, somebody you like or appreciate feel liked and/or appreciated? the day doesnt have to be only about raging passion or real-life recreations of overblown, overwrought soap-opera romance - everyone likes to be remembered, or know they are thought of warmly. the essence of v-day can be very sweet if one chooses to eschew the blatant commercialization and aggressive vulgarity, and to celebrate the day in a quiet, heartfelt way - give someone a homemade card or cookies, or a simple bouquet of flowers or even just a friendly hug and a "happy valentines day!" and so theres one day set aside for the celebration of love, or to express affection? just because there is doesnt mean one cant do the same the other 364 days of the year, as well. (but, do you? do most people?) having a certain day designated specifically for the display of love actually makes it easier for the more stoic in nature to share genuine emotion and easier for others to accept, because, on valentines day, its socially "ok" to be emotive and affectionate. and wheres the harm in that? I agree.... so much attention is focused on "bad" stuff like violence and celebrities. Being kind and loving is usually made to look weak.It is a shame really. I think it takes more courage to reach out and show someone love and affection than it does to say or do something mean. Hope you are healing well btw I agree whole heartedly with you, I've experienced this first hand. I mellowed a lot a couple of years ago and naturally (for me) I started showing a kinder softer side and showing emotions they’d never seen, then the take no shit, I could giveadamn person everyone knew. I was seen as everything from weak and pathetic in people’s eyes to even being laughed at and berated for being really honest in showing another side of myself. A side that can hurt, that loves beyond words, or no matter how mad or angry I am I’m considerate, careful, and mindful of what and how I say things to people I love. I had always heard that showing a softer side was viewed as weak and a lack of strength and I'd believed it coming up but after experiencing it first hand for myself I know that it is without question viewed as a negative, especially if you’ve never shown it before. The only side people clearly see now is when I’m angry. | |
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my bad, I didn't mean to but a damper on the thread 
back to PS Fuck valentine  | |
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statuesqque said: my bad, I didn't mean to but a damper on the thread
back to PS Fuck valentine You never put a damper on a thread. | |
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shanti0608 said: statuesqque said: my bad, I didn't mean to but a damper on the thread
back to PS Fuck valentine You never put a damper on a thread.  | |
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statuesqque said: shanti0608 said: You never put a damper on a thread. | |
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