If you have five seconds to spare, then please take a look at my writings...
Be gentle with me

http://www.writerscafe.or...%20Pottle/

Thank you,
Steven.

x 1 billion

i love it, such beautiful imagery.

you should publish some of your work.

i write poetry myself, i also write lyrics, short stories.
what other type of writing do you do?

baroque said:

Thank you. I write mainly poetry, but have ideas and sketches for longer pieces...maybe even short stories.
I'd love to get published and am making that one of my goals for this year- I have a massive body of work to choose from, so fingers crossed

Do you have examples of your work?- I'd like to read some.

oh wow...

I still look to a time when someone may put down their gun in horror and love the pretty petals of simple flowers

that's beautiful...

very nice stuff

sammij said:

Thank you. That line just speaks so loud in these times when you can't make sense of war or conflict etc. And you long for people to look past their gates, palaces and look into the sky or at nature- not wanting to sound like somekind of hippie, BUT nature and life is greater!

stevenpottle said:

you're right, and it only sounds like a cliche because it's been downplayed by people who really dont mind, or even are alright with hate..

Wow

Thanks everyone- I was a shy about showing you all my work, so cheers for taking a look.

Steven x

stevenpottle said:

beautiful.... "the dove" hit me right here >>

I've read only one so far (I like to read poems very slowly - sorry) and I can't wait to read the rest.

Breaking The Fourth Wall

I completely relate to this one.
You focus on a very complex and "heavy" feeling / state / emotion (?),
which can be a bit discouraging to an everyday reader (like me).
Yet even though the atmosphere becomes very dense around the lines:

It’s already there in my head and calls everyday
So do I burn the kitchen down or end up killing something?
Each brick that it hits and every break that stays
The aching in my foundations will not go away

you offer a very nice release in the last four verses,
which makes the message of the poem more "digestible" to the readers
(and to the lyrical I as well, me thinks).

The only thing that I would suggest is
providing the poem with an element
that would enhance the sense of entrapment
of the lyrical I. I have an idea of you could do,
but I don't want to be intrusive.


Oh and I absolutely LOVE this line:
"So these thoughts that I have
Are more dangerous than the actions I take"


I've started reading "Front of House".
I'll let you know what I think, when I'm done.
So far I get a F. Scott Fitzgerald vibe from it.

PS PLEASE don't take what I say to seriously.
I know very little about poetry.
Overall I'm really impressed.

for hawt and smart
[Edited 1/4/08 16:40pm]

You've got a talent there. Mine is bone idleness.

I like it alot!!


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Wonderful wonderful WONDERFUL! !!!!!

I am an aspiring writer too I don't do poems though. Not because I don't like them but because I suck at it. Last year I submitted a proposal to write a book and was not accepted But I will keep trying till my story gets told

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

i really like it!

baroque said:

Hey there- thank you for sending some of your writings to me. I replied to you with an orgnote, but not sure it was sent, so this is what I said:

Wow- thank you for sharing your writing with me. You obviously have a talent- I'd like to read more and you really should join the writers site- they are good people on there and love reading new writers pieces.
You are at a fantastic age for writing and finding influence- there is a n unwritten rule that you have to be a certain age or have lived a great deal to truly have a voice about the world around you and I find that really offensive. At 19, I knew how I felt about certain subjects and the world and looked at the life with both beauty and disagreement. I look back at some of the things that I had written and they are sometimes embarrassing, but they were who I was at that time and I'm kinda proud that I was that person.
As for favourite poets- I tend not to read much as it forces a style or panics me that I'm not writing in that way...I'm dyslexic also so that makes it difficult to read others poetry- I do actually sit and read lyrics to songs, or hear someone say something...or just look at my own life and that inspires MANY words and sentences I guess I'm poetry poison in that respect, but it works for me.
Thanks again for sharing and keep writing.

Steven.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

hey Supa- I'd love to read some of your writing.

rushing07 said:

Wow- thank you for the great review...I'd love to hear your idea- message me.
I also know very little about poetry, but I know about feeling and so this is where my writing comes from.
Did you have a good Christmas/New year/MOVE! by the way.