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PrintableZombieKitten said: One4All4Ever said: I wouldn't call that a woman thing. I think men need that as well. I know that is what I miss right now. Every person needs someone who's there regardless, to listen, to care, to comfort and to support. I was with my close friend Carolyn today, there are things I would not dream of telling her. That is what I wish my husband is for, to listen to strange or worrying thoughts - even for him to say "don't be silly  ". He on the other hand, thinks I need a close female friend to talk to, to let him off the hook, because he is too busy for the trivial stuff I might think about.In the US they go to a shrink for that  | |
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One4All4Ever said: ZombieKitten said: I was with my close friend Carolyn today, there are things I would not dream of telling her. That is what I wish my husband is for, to listen to strange or worrying thoughts - even for him to say "don't be silly ". He on the other hand, thinks I need a close female friend to talk to, to let him off the hook, because he is too busy for the trivial stuff I might think about.In the US they go to a shrink for that  | |
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One4All4Ever said: ZombieKitten said: I feel the same, I lived with him already, so why not buy a house? after that, might as well get married. Guess what comes next, yup, KIDS.  Now I feel if I left, I would not be a person anyone else could love, I mean, how heartless a person would I be, that leaves her husband and children! so of course I can't do that  I've been on the brink of doing that ... but I can't leave my boys. I'm complex, I've tried but I can't do affairs therefor I can also never start a new relationship while still married. I can do plain sex, but it doesn't satisfy me. Ok ... that's it for me ... lock this thread ... it sucks plain old sex would only be a bandaid | |
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ZombieKitten said: Fauxie said:  I'm sorry to hear that Charlotte. I haven't been able to help noticing some of your posts betraying some of these feelings, and I wondered how serious you were being. Thanks Nick 
I'm very close to that ultimatum kind of thing, which totally sucks  you know, the "shape up or I'm leaving you" kind. He seems to want a 50s wife, who is fulfilled by housework (albeit on valium) who is cheerful even though he is only home 2 out of 7 nights a week. I'm very lonely and resentful that I can't do anything about my loneliness or boredom. We used to have fun together, you know?  I hope for you that it doesn't come to that. I'm truly sorry to hear of your situation Charls. | |
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Fauxie said: ZombieKitten said: Thanks Nick
I'm very close to that ultimatum kind of thing, which totally sucks you know, the "shape up or I'm leaving you" kind. He seems to want a 50s wife, who is fulfilled by housework (albeit on valium) who is cheerful even though he is only home 2 out of 7 nights a week. I'm very lonely and resentful that I can't do anything about my loneliness or boredom. We used to have fun together, you know? I hope for you that it doesn't come to that. I'm truly sorry to hear of your situation Charls.
I get really REALLY lonely. I HATE that. | |
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ZombieKitten said: Fauxie said: I hope for you that it doesn't come to that. I'm truly sorry to hear of your situation Charls.
I get really REALLY lonely. I HATE that. Mon and I spend too much time together, but I guess that sounds really ungrateful considering what you're saying.
I get really possessive though. If Mon goes out with the girls sometimes I find myself just twiddling my thumbs feeling sorry for myself, as if the things I'd usually do when she's here now aren't enough simply because she's not around. I may sit on this computer some days and not pay nearly as much attention as I should to her, then the minute she's not here I'm so bored and lonely it's stupid. | |
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Fauxie said: ZombieKitten said:
I get really REALLY lonely. I HATE that. Mon and I spend too much time together, but I guess that sounds really ungrateful considering what you're saying.
I get really possessive though. If Mon goes out with the girls sometimes I find myself just twiddling my thumbs feeling sorry for myself, as if the things I'd usually do when she's here now aren't enough simply because she's not around. I may sit on this computer some days and not pay nearly as much attention as I should to her, then the minute she's not here I'm so bored and lonely it's stupid. | |
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ZombieKitten said: Fauxie said: Mon and I spend too much time together, but I guess that sounds really ungrateful considering what you're saying.
I get really possessive though. If Mon goes out with the girls sometimes I find myself just twiddling my thumbs feeling sorry for myself, as if the things I'd usually do when she's here now aren't enough simply because she's not around. I may sit on this computer some days and not pay nearly as much attention as I should to her, then the minute she's not here I'm so bored and lonely it's stupid. Thanks, but I don't deserve such comforting. It's stupid that today I've been on this computer nearly all day, and Mon's been here in the room with me for maybe 8 or 9 hours and we've spoken just a handful of sentences to each other. I've been planning to turn the computer off and go and watch some crap TV with her for the last 2 hours! Stoopid me and stoopid org! | |
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Fauxie said: ZombieKitten said: Thanks, but I don't deserve such comforting. It's stupid that today I've been on this computer nearly all day, and Mon's been here in the room with me for maybe 8 or 9 hours and we've spoken just a handful of sentences to each other. I've been planning to turn the computer off and go and watch some crap TV with her for the last 2 hours! Stoopid me and stoopid org! 
better? | |
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ZombieKitten said: Fauxie said: Thanks, but I don't deserve such comforting. It's stupid that today I've been on this computer nearly all day, and Mon's been here in the room with me for maybe 8 or 9 hours and we've spoken just a handful of sentences to each other. I've been planning to turn the computer off and go and watch some crap TV with her for the last 2 hours! Stoopid me and stoopid org!
better? Thanks. I'm turning this thing off so I can go and watch some movie about Queen Latifah having a terminal illness and acting all crazy. 
| |
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Fauxie said: ZombieKitten said:
better? Thanks. I'm turning this thing off so I can go and watch some movie about Queen Latifah having a terminal illness and acting all crazy.
tell me if it is any good, I heard it was very popular! | |
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ZombieKitten said: Fauxie said: I'm sorry to hear that Charlotte. I haven't been able to help noticing some of your posts betraying some of these feelings, and I wondered how serious you were being. Thanks Nick
I'm very close to that ultimatum kind of thing, which totally sucks you know, the "shape up or I'm leaving you" kind. He seems to want a 50s wife, who is fulfilled by housework (albeit on valium) who is cheerful even though he is only home 2 out of 7 nights a week. I'm very lonely and resentful that I can't do anything about my loneliness or boredom. We used to have fun together, you know?
I had no idea you were feeling this way. Speak to him, for your own sanity. The status quo does not sound like a good compromise.  | |
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sj1600 said: ZombieKitten said: Thanks Nick
I'm very close to that ultimatum kind of thing, which totally sucks you know, the "shape up or I'm leaving you" kind. He seems to want a 50s wife, who is fulfilled by housework (albeit on valium) who is cheerful even though he is only home 2 out of 7 nights a week. I'm very lonely and resentful that I can't do anything about my loneliness or boredom. We used to have fun together, you know?
I had no idea you were feeling this way. Speak to him, for your own sanity. The status quo does not sound like a good compromise. I have, numerous times. I need to say it with a HAMMER, I think  | |
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ZombieKitten said: sj1600 said:
I had no idea you were feeling this way. Speak to him, for your own sanity. The status quo does not sound like a good compromise. I have, numerous times. I need to say it with a HAMMER, I think Or.. use a... | |
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sj1600 said: ZombieKitten said: I have, numerous times. I need to say it with a HAMMER, I think Or.. use a...  I could write a letter and wrap it round a brick! SJ you're a genius! | |
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ZombieKitten said: sj1600 said: Or.. use a... I could write a letter and wrap it round a brick! SJ you're a genius!
Perfect, he can read it when he comes round from his concussion. Right, I have got to go to work! Much as I hate to leave my beloved computer. Have a good weekend. | |
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sj1600 said: ZombieKitten said: I could write a letter and wrap it round a brick! SJ you're a genius!
Perfect, he can read it when he comes round from his concussion. Right, I have got to go to work! Much as I hate to leave my beloved computer. Have a good weekend.you too!  | |
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ZombieKitten said: sj1600 said: Or.. use a... I could write a letter and wrap it round a brick! SJ you're a genius!You have to find a way it rings through to him somehow. If not he will lose you sooner or later. With a very special thank you to Tina: Is hammer already absolute, how much some people verändern...ICH hope is never so I will be! And if, then I hope that I would then have wen in my environment who joins me in the A.... | |
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Serious said: ZombieKitten said: I could write a letter and wrap it round a brick! SJ you're a genius!You have to find a way it rings through to him somehow. If not he will lose you sooner or later. if only I had the guts | |
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ZombieKitten said: Serious said: You have to find a way it rings through to him somehow. If not he will lose you sooner or later. if only I had the guts
The way you describe him he seems to be quite happy to have you around as you are the one who is the centre of his home and family. So he should be quite concerned that all that may come to an end if he doesn't work on the relationship. You need to tell him that you are unhappy and desperate  .With a very special thank you to Tina: Is hammer already absolute, how much some people verändern...ICH hope is never so I will be! And if, then I hope that I would then have wen in my environment who joins me in the A.... | |
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Serious said: ZombieKitten said: if only I had the guts
The way you describe him he seems to be quite happy to have you around as you are the one who is the centre of his home and family. So he should be quite concerned that all that may come to an end if he doesn't work on the relationship. You need to tell him that you are unhappy and desperate .I have! | |
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jony it's on FIYAH!!!! | |
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ZombieKitten said: Serious said:
The way you describe him he seems to be quite happy to have you around as you are the one who is the centre of his home and family. So he should be quite concerned that all that may come to an end if he doesn't work on the relationship. You need to tell him that you are unhappy and desperate .I have!  Did you tell him that you are thinking about running away from it all?With a very special thank you to Tina: Is hammer already absolute, how much some people verändern...ICH hope is never so I will be! And if, then I hope that I would then have wen in my environment who joins me in the A.... | |
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Serious said: ZombieKitten said: I have! Did you tell him that you are thinking about running away from it all?he doesn't believe me 
but I don't really want to | |
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ZombieKitten said: Serious said: Did you tell him that you are thinking about running away from it all?he doesn't believe me
but I don't really want to
He seems to be the typical man who is not able to see how serious the situation is until it is too late  .
Have you ever thought about counselling? With a very special thank you to Tina: Is hammer already absolute, how much some people verändern...ICH hope is never so I will be! And if, then I hope that I would then have wen in my environment who joins me in the A.... | |
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Serious said: ZombieKitten said: he doesn't believe me
but I don't really want to
He seems to be the typical man who is not able to see how serious the situation is until it is too late .
Have you ever thought about counselling? the thing is, he isn't, he really isn't typical AT all - he is just so busy he has no time for me or my issues | |
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ZombieKitten said: Serious said: Did you tell him that you are thinking about running away from it all?he doesn't believe me
but I don't really want to Err, hello, you know me Charlotte... I collaborated with Leo one time. Makes me want to write him a new song, about another subject!! Anyway... there's such a thing as a "trial separation." Where you go off for a bit by yourself and do some hard thinking. Gives him the chance to do that thinking too. I'm not saying to do this, could be dangerous... could also help solve a few things. Hope you guys can work something out, really I do. | |
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ZombieKitten said: Serious said:
He seems to be the typical man who is not able to see how serious the situation is until it is too late .
Have you ever thought about counselling? the thing is, he isn't, he really isn't typical AT all - he is just so busy he has no time for me or my issues So if he is a nice caring man, but too busy he should reconsider what is most important to him and that should be his wife and family . He needs to find time for you, it's not your issues, but his as well as it is affecting your relationship.With a very special thank you to Tina: Is hammer already absolute, how much some people verändern...ICH hope is never so I will be! And if, then I hope that I would then have wen in my environment who joins me in the A.... | |
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I've never been married so I've never "cheated".
But I have in some of my past relationships. One thing I've realized is that it's not worth it. You need to sever ties first, then move on regardless of what the perceived consequences. Cheating while in the relationship is like trying to have your cake and eat it too. | |
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jonylawson said: ever had one?
would you? if nobody EVER found out(hyperthetically coz of course this is posted now) would you/have you? some would argue that theres nothing more exciting than naughty sex..... me? im just curious At the risk of pissing off someone, I will unequivocally say that affairs are wrong. Anyone who has had one has committed a cowardly act. No exceptions. | |
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