So last night my ex-girlfriend and I went to a NY's party and everything with a couple of her friends blah blah. It was strictly just-friends type thing you know. So I went, just to hang out, because we don't have any bad feelings toward each other, etc. Well the ball drops at midnight and we go on about the tradition of kissing someone at midnight. Which I was okay with, and I thought she was gonna do this anyway, but I didn't know she was gonna lay a full-on tounge kiss on me. Well long story short, we ended up sleeping together. We were both buzzed and I'm wondering WTF is gonna happen now. Pray for me, I have a feeling the shit's gonna hit the fan soon and this is gonna open a whole can of worms now....

If she broke up with you and then slept with you, you have nothing to worry about but if you broke up with her and then slept with her...well...

you're in a lot of shit.

Erin summed it up pretty well

Well it was a mutual thing. We just realized we weren't in love anymore and thought we'd be better off as friends. I actually didn't talk to her at all between the breakup and the party. It was like "I don't know if this is gonna work out" and she calmly agreed. There was no fighting, or anything like that. I just have a feeling she's gonna start some drama BS or something. Not that she's ever done anything like that before, but I find it quite bizarre that we didn't talk to each other for a month and then we end up sleeping together out of nowhere...
[Edited 1/1/08 14:21pm]

If it was truly mutual then you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

And anyone that has been in a serious relationship knows that the first breakup never takes...especially if it was "mutual".

It's not bizarre that you guys hooked up after not having contact for a period of time. In fact, I'd say that's extremely common.

best wishes with all the fall out from that

JustErin said:

it could be the festiveness of it all and being with someone familiar... then again the last couple I know that went through a breakup not speaking and sleeping together ended up married in the end.

Mach said:

Unless there was some massive falling out where 2 people end up hating each other, when they see each other again the thing that attracted them to each other in the first place creeps back up (which is usually sexual chemistry) and bam, there they are in bed together again.

Mach said:

not so sure about that m'self...

If u need me to do ANYTHING let me know

sammij said:

yeah, I'm with ya there...

If I was smart,
I'd post something here that'd might be able to help with this.


But I'm not.
So I can't.

Hell, I've never understood the whole can of worms metaphor.
Besides....
I am so fuckin' hungover right now, I just wanna die.

You missed a golden opportunity to try all the crazy shit you were afraid to do while going out.

I would say the butt is 50% more likely to be bothered during broken up sex. That is of course a non scientific observation.

Mars23 said:

And I am talking about couples who have actually slept with each other while they were together. Sexual chemistry is a hard thing to resist...especially when a break up is mutual or ended on good terms.

JustErin said:

I can see where it could creep back in and some may then choose to end up in bed. For me the 3 prior serious relations before my marriage ended mutually and the 1st break was the final break - we were still friends but I never fooled around or slept with them again - not even a kiss - yes at tims i found them attractive in some ways but not enough to reattach for a fuck

so to me it just seemed strange (your comment about "anyone who...")

don't get ahead of yourself, nothing may even come of this...just wait and see what happens.

We're sort of talking about it now on AIM. Basically I said, "So, what was the deal with last nite" and now she's typing some long response I guess.....
[Edited 1/1/08 14:58pm]

Volitan said:

So what was the deal on your end, You wanted to have sex with her right ?

Mach said:

yeah, it shouldn't be totally up to her what went on last night

you didn't lay there like a board, so perhaps while you wait for a response you should think about what the deal was with last night to you too.

Mach said:

Ok, fair enough but I certainly believe that you are an exception to the rule (there are always some, right?).

Volitan said:

I'm sensing that you kinda wanna give it another try. Am I way off?

Mach said:

Yes, but it never would've crossed my mind if she hadn't initiated it, I didn't come onto her. I was under the impression that we were "just friends", and then she kisses me and we end up banging in he friend's bedroom. I have several female friends and I would bang everyone of them if they gave me the chance. This was no different. Once she basically let me know what was up, I wasn't gonna pass it up....

Volitan said:

so what do you want then
you're letting her call all the shots so you can't be held accountable for anything?

what is it you're trying to gain out of asking her what went on last night? you know exactly what went on last night, and you want more - if you didn't you wouldn't be so anxious and so chicken shit to ask her over AIM (sorry i dont mean to be rude but seriously, AIM?)

what did she say anyway?

again, not trying to be a bitch with you or anything, just calling it as i see it
[Edited 1/1/08 15:12pm]

JustErin said:

I don't wanna be the exception _ I want to be one that fucked an X's brains out just to do it

JustErin said:

Well, yes and no. I mean, we were fell head-over-heels pretty quick and we ended up getting in this fight and basically broke up for a couple days. We got back together, but we weren't really in love anymore, and then we broke up for real. She's a great person and everything, but I just don't think I'm in love with her like that.....

Anyway, she responded and in so many words she basically said some very flattering things about me, and that she didn't wanna "get serious" again and just wanted to have "some fun".

Volitan said:

:Omg: U Mr. ! are SUCH a SLUT

Mach said:

and there it is!

Volitan said:

I don't think that you are being totally honest with yourself, imo. You should probably come to terms with you wanting to still be with her - love or not love. I think you maybe thought it would never happen because you had no contact but now that you've hooked up again you think it's a possibility. It may be, but I gotta tell you...most times when these after break up hook ups happen it's not.

She said it was just a hookup and nothing more...I say, believe her and be done with it. Otherwise you are likely to go nuts over this whole thing.

sammij said:

I don't think you're a bitch...I'm just trying to get a handle on why she decided to come onto me at all in the first place. I know it takes two to tango, so to speak, and I accept that I participated just as much as she did...I'm just wondering why she initiated anything to begin with.....