I was on a plane yesterday for 2 hours and a baby in the seat behind me screamed from tarmac to tarmac. I'm not talking a little whining here and there - I'm talking about screaming bloody murder from the time the kid got on the plane until the time we exited. Parents either need to keep their little rats quiet or they should be put in cages down with the animals and luggage - then the only thing there to hear the little menaces crying are dogs and socks.

Seriously though, no family members want to see these hyper-sensitive, crying poop-machines until they develop a personality anyways! And, if you consider squealing like a pig for hours on end a "personality", off to the baggage compartment with you as well!

I'm not even suggesting that we don't make some accommodations for these little runts - put up some fucking Big Bird posters and play some fucking Raffi - just get them out of the fucking cabin and let the paying passengers sleep, relax, or just not listen to these little scourges ruin what is already an uncomfortable airplane ride.

Thank you, and my God continue to bless us all.

Babies can be a pain in the ass

DontTazeMeBro said:

Damn, man - even I like babies.

theodore said:

There was one baby directly behind me and another directly behind him! So, I had the joy of listening to these drooling slobs play a game of unintelligible Marco-Polo!

DontTazeMeBro said:

Oh lawd

While I don't like crying babies on a plane take this as food for thought...

Kids on a plane. Babies cry. That's it. That's all. Don't be sour, give the parents a dirty look, or let out an exasperated sigh. You were a baby once. You cried, too. Afford mothers traveling alone every courtesy. EVERY courtesy. Parents of children on planes: Do not bring forty different toys for you child, do not bring a toy that beeps and toots constantly. Come on, now. Really. Keep your kids behaved, using inside voices, and stop them from kicking the seat in front of them. CCR. For families traveling together, always give up your seat if it keeps them together. This includes couples, old or young.Nathan Fillion

there are always these...

superspaceboy said:

How many of those do you need to shove in the little bastard's mouth to keep him quiet?

DontTazeMeBro said:

Probably as many you'd put up your butt to do the same!

DontTazeMeBro said:

Dude. I guess you really don't like babies. Why? Shit, babies are the only people I can stand. They're too young to do anything. All they do is sleep and shit and eat and coo and they want you to hug them and shit like that.

Goddamn.

GreenLeaves said:

Don't forget crying on planes. They do that too!

superspaceboy said:

I usually just cry, scream & bawl right back at 'em, but since I'm an adult it's alot more louder & annoying. Not to mention, all out frightening.
Freaks 'em & their parents the fuck out.
And probably everyone's else on board too.
But I figure,
y'know what?
If we're gonna have this uncomfortable & awkward situation on the plane,
then let's go all the way with it, you know what I mean?

Illustrator said:

That poor baby..he/she's ears were probably hurting from the flight..the parents should have planned for that.

MoniGram said:

that happened to Jackson

whatever happened to rubbing whiskey on a baby's gums to make it shut up and go to sleep? is that just for teething? they should make little baby sized shot glasses. babies on planes should be drunk and passed out.

Anxiety said:

Nope. they get that during circumcision too. it works like a charm. but not whiskey, they get red wine.

MoniGram said:

My ears were hurting from that little rat's screaming. Off to the cargo area!

DontTazeMeBro said:

I am sorry

ArielB said:

perhaps circumcisions should be performed on planes. if they're going to scream the whole time anyway, might as well make an occasion out of it.

GreenLeaves said:

all I know is...i love your sig
[Edited 12/27/07 18:13pm]

Anxiety said:

[Edited 12/28/07 11:26am]

The worst thing that ever happened in the world was the notion that it's wrong to dope children.

Unless it's Ritalin, of course.

superspaceboy said:

Agreed. And on a side note, kids seem to travel now more than when I was little.

babooshleeky said:

Poor kid.

superspaceboy said:

What's funny is, I never used to be able to withstand babies and/or little kids until my nephews came along. I guess if you're around it enough, you get used to it.

psychodelicide said:

That's because airfares are so much cheaper since they were deregulated in the 1980s. It used to be way too expensive for most families to travel by plane.

Anyone can afford to fly now, pretty much. My sister (who's a flight attendant) told me she had someone on one of her flights who tried to buy a cocktail with food stamps.

Genesia said:

True, airfares have come down in price quite a bit. At the person trying to buy a drink with foodstamps.

Rhondab said: