If heartbreak must happen, it is much better to get it out of the way, or that is something else that will keep you hung up on someone for a long time while you avoid being hurt but never really get over that person. Once you hurt and come to the realization that it won't happen, you can move on. But you have to tell them while your feelings are actually current. Otherwise they won't really understand your behavior from now on.

benyamin said:

Hahahaha!

This edit is very different from what you said originally.

violator said:

Yeah....

ps

Cinnie said:

This is how I see it too.

I feel so Pollyanna about this, but it's the god honest truth. I married the only man I have ever loved and said I love you to, we have been married now, 24 years and counting.

JustErin said:

I know! I got an angry IM.

benyamin said:

That's what I figured.

PaisleyPark5083 said:

That's sweet. Its so great when that happens and people are truly happy.

That's not my lifestyle though.

JustErin said:

And I'm supposed to be the man in this relationship.

JustErin said:

They are words of wisdom Erin

dress up in some lace and wait till he walks into the club, wait a bit then start singing beautiful ones, if he starts crying when you get to the bit about you wanting him, him wanting you. then you are onto a winner...
if the fucker starts laughing or worse looks embarassed, then sorry baby you lucked out...

personally i think you need to address why you find it so hard to be yourself around men you like, shit, if you played it like you can play it, this whole thing would be the other way around and he would be telling you, rather than you telling him.

but anyways that's another story and this is still some brave shit baby, go for it and good luck...

JustErin said:

and I understand that...it runs in my family though. My 2 sisters have been married 32 and 29 years...and my parents and grandparents to their death bed. wierd, I guess.

eraclito said:

wayyy easier said than done

Cinnie said:

life is some difficult shit, i agree...

Everytime I pop on a Prince tune, I fall in love with eraclito. He knows why.

anyway, erin, don't be a wuss (like me) and just tell him.

INSATIABLE said:

eraclito said:

That's a whole other thread right there. It has to do with a severe lack of confidence.

JustErin said:

Agreed!

CarrieMpls said:

"I always compare marriage to communism: they're both institutions that don't conform to human nature, so you're going to end up with lying and hypocrisy." - Bill Maher

CarrieMpls said:

Don't do it!

On the very few times that I've done this,
I was smart about it.
I didn't tell her until after she finished blowing me.
It keeps the situation from becoming awkward.

PaisleyPark5083 said:

Not weird. Beautiful.

Illustrator said:

LOL, you could moan "I love you" and if the other person goes weird on you, you could say you were moaning "I love it" and save face.

Ace said:

Bill Maher is an idiot.

send him a link to this thread

One4All4Ever said:

Very funny.

RodeoSchro said:

My intention was leaning more towards saving head than saving face.

(Oh, & BTW,
I hope that this doesn't cum off as me correcting your grammar.
I'm not.
I hate it when someone does that to me.
She's such a sweet old lady.)

Illustrator said:

I see no reason why my advice would not save both head and face.
[Edited 10/30/07 14:52pm]

paintedlady said:

How the fuck is someone your boyfriend if they don't LOVE YOU and can't say it .

If it's just a crush, a datemate, or a fuck buddy you're trying to progress a step forward with I could (possibly) understand. But a "boyfriend" is something different all together. Even if you're not trying to marry the sommamabitch, at least you should know beforehand if he's got your back emotionally before you become entangled. Otherwise that clearly is not your man, and essentially you're just dating and/or fuckin'around ...