An Old Farmer's Advice :
* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.
* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.
* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.
* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
* You cannot unsay a cruel word.
* Every path has a few puddles.
* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
* The best sermons are lived, not preached.
* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
* Don't judge folks by their relatives.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.
* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.
* Always drink upstream from the herd.
* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.





What advice or quotes do you love?

Never trust a man alone in a room with a tea cosy who does not put it on to wear as a hat.

Never hesitate to kiss a pretty girl or open a bottle of whiskey.

Or something like that.

two tears in a bucket and fuck it

Those advices are more needed at P&R

Well, except for horatio's

never whittle a stick towards yourself and never pee against the wind...

Imago said:

Those are all great quotes..but HELLO to the guy holding the apples!

Never trust something that bleeds for 5 days and lives.

horatio said:

You mean women?
You're evil!

PANDURITO said:

- Mr. Garrison

"If they're willing to cheat with ya, they're willing to cheat on ya."-Dr Phil

"Never trust a big butt and a smile."-BBD

"You have two arms, two legs and a hind end. Do it yourself."-my grandma

"If I had $5, I'd run away!" -my mom whenever I asked to borrow money.

"She's got more (insert pleural noun) than Carter has pills."-my mom

"I look like I've been through the wreck of the Hesperus."-my mom

"That house is older than who laid the rail."-my mom

JuliePurplehead said:

I need to use that one on my kids!

Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

Be nice to the nerds and geeks in high school - you’ll be working for them in the future.

If you can't stand a person, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes, too.

WillyWonka said:

I like that

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.

rushing07 said:

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

I like that one, expecially the jes

WillyWonka said:

I make my husband hold this book all the time I even have a photo somewhere

horatio said:

oh no

horatio said:

And if it wants to have sex with you,
just tell it to blow you.
Period.

Imago said:

thats not true, I was worried about the backstreet boys reforming. and they did.

jami0mckay said:

What do farmers know anyway?

"I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it."

"Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results."

Insanity is doing the same thing in the same way and expecting a different outcome.

If you detect a theme, you are very astute.....I love them because they epitomize the progression of ideas and decisions in the meetings I attend every day....always leave in total that we accomplish anything...

Money on the wood makes the talk good.
Money out of sight starts a hell of a fight.