JustErin said:

Tell me about it.
I'm starting to think I'm bipolar.
Crap.
[Edited 9/9/07 17:53pm]

rushing07 said:

Why?

JustErin said:

Nah, we all have talked and agree you'd be !@$#ed up, regardless.

Lammastide said:

JustErin said:

Moodswings.

Long story. Will tell you some other time cuz it's 3 am here.

rushing07 said:

and is always your way of getting out of an explanation

ZombieKitten said:

It's 3 AM!

rushing07 said:

Sorry to hear about your sister. I have been dealing with EDNOS (eating disorders unspecified) for years now. I'm sure it hasn't been easy for her to hide it. Most people who suffer from an ed would love to get the shame and stress off their chests. She's probably happy that you all know now. It won't be easy though. She needs some serious counseling and therapy to find out what triggered her ed. Most importantly, you and your family have to be very supportive of her recovery





Smooches;)

Oh Jen sweetheart..I am so sorry to hear about your sister. I know that with you by her side she will get through this..I know you have so much going on in your personal life and now this too, you are a strong courageous woman, keep your chin up, love and support your sister that will mean the world to her!! , one for you and one for sis!!

Lammastide said:

She doesn't binge, she just eats normally and then purges. The doctor calls it anorexia but you are right, it strikes me as a bulemic cycle more than anorexic. She's never really been underweight but very slim, my mum says she's doing better now weight-wise than she has been in a while.

Much love to you and your sis

Well, how did your parents find out?? Did she come to them LOOKING for help. Because honestly, your not going to be able to help her unless she wants you to.

I mean, especially if this has been going on for 10 yrs.

I'm not here to spread negativity, just being honest.

The mind of a person with an eating disorder, is like the mind of a person with a drug addiction.

They don't want to CURE their disease. They want to PROTECT it. At all costs. Its a disease of secrets and lies. And its also very hard to unravel what has been done to her way of thinking.

Food is an obsession. Her life is most likely based around food. She thinks about it all the time.

I hope she does want help.

Just like anyone with an addiction, you and her have a long road ahead. Relapses. Frustration.

When she does start eating without perging, she is going to become very depressed. She will rather die than eat.

I can go on.

Orgnote me.

Thanks all for your support and input, apart from wlcm2thdwn - you're an asshole and an idiot. Never make a post directed at me again.

I especially want to thank JustErin for sharing, I don't think many of us if any had any idea that you had gone through this. Thanks for being so open about it, it's people like you who help remove the stigma surrounding ed's.

Dani - what happened was this: My sister got an inflammation in her shoulder and she got naproxen for it, but it gave her an ulcer since she didn't have enough food in her stomach to take care of it so to speak (incredibly simplified of course). She was hospitalised and with what the docs found - low blood pressure, her enamel being worn and such, her bf put two and two together and confronted her. She then confessed and as far as I know she's relieved it's out in the open. Her bf told my mum as well and now she is in treatment like I wrote in my initial post. I'm fully aware how much of a struggle it will be to get her back into good health, but I doubt her bf or our mum knows this yet.

I'm so sorry to hear that. I'd love to be able to give advice, but each case varies so much. Unconditional love and support, unsurprisingly, is good. Personally I would stay away from trying to convince her about the need to eat food and regain weight. Anorexics are often aware of the damage they are doing to themselves, and reminding them only serves to reinforce the guilt they already feel for hurting themselves and their families. Which, unfortunately, can make things worse. That's not an answer, of course. I'm sorry I can't help, but wish your family all the best, truly.

sorry Jen..

MAKE sure she is seen by a doctor to check on her health and then create a plan towards recovery.

Electrolites are way down when someone is bulimic or anorexic. So very much of the body is damaged through years of the disease..

I love you..!!

Teacher said:

Well. I mean. She is gonna need a whole life style change, I'm sure you know.

Just really be there to listen. And if you will be living close to her just spend as much time as she wants you to spend with her, and really follow her requests. Don't overwhelm her. Let her be in control.

Ummmm. Yanno just all kinds of patterns need to change. You know. The place shes at will give yous all kinds of things to do.

Yanno. Yanno how ppl cut themselves. Well purging is the same thing. A climax, a feeling of relief. Um. Just like shooting up or whatever. Its a series of events that leads up to the climax.

So she may replace one 'drug' with another....so maybe....find something positive to replace it...

I don't know.

when people use the bathroom in my house I always jiggle the door handle to see if its locked or not

to your sis and to you because you care

I've been there (both bulimist and anorexic) until I decided not to hurt my body anymore it was 15 years ago. I'm 33 and if the worse is behind, I don't have any advice to give you (I decided on my own to stop vomiting, even if I had to look "fat").

Like any other addictions (and believe me I had them all), she has to WANT to stop. Tell her : if anyday or night you think you're fed up with this and want to b cured/helped, I'll b there for you (and find a good center for her to be cured)

Good luck

If you have any further question, feel free to ask.

Jen, by being there for her, you're already doing the right thing.

The only advice I can give after being alongside loved ones who have battled both diseases, is to do whatever it takes to be "on their team" and not bombard them with questions and/or input from an outsider's point of view, because it makes them feel like they're being interrogated and attacked. I become so angry, analytical, and idealistic about situations that I tend to build walls around the very people I'm trying to help. It's unintentional, but I get really angry that they're hurting that though I want to attack their ILLNESS with all my strength so they become cured, it makes them feel I'm attacking them personally. So, don't be too much of an enabler by acting extremely passive, but try and avoid the nip-it-in-the-bud technique; considering the only person who's going to be able to heal her is herself. And only when she wants to, of course. Hopefully, that's the case now.

Again people, thanks for all the wonderful support and advice both on here and in orgnotes.

Dani: Orgnote.

Thefrog: Good to see you back I know this about the food/eating, that's not what she needs help with really, like I said before it's a control addiction and that's the issue. It's a fine line though, between supporting and enabling.

Dora: Love you Her blood pressure is shot, but after she was diagnosed she has gained weight and thereby gotten her blood pressure up.



As many of you know my sister has a daughter, Tyra, who's turning 3 in November and she's our major "weapon" in this battle - Sophia would never do anything to hurt Tyra or even risk it, so talking to her about that and how she WILL hurt her if she keeps it up is the incentive right now. Also like I said, Manne (sis' bf) was the one who confronted her with the bulimia and they live together so he's always on top of it/her. He goes with her to the doc but not to the counseling. I'm hoping she can get some cognitive behavioral therapy, does anybody have any experience of this regarding ED's?

wlcm2thdwn said:

Oh my word...I am disgusted that you would say something like this. You are rude and extremely unsympathetic. You have no right to judge someone like that. Why did you feel the need to post such an ugly thing in this thread? Teacher is hurting over her sister and needed support and you came along and acted a fool.

You really should be ashamed of yourself. I really try hard to ignore things that I don't like on here, but I couldn't hold my tongue on this one.

An eating disorder is a disease. She can't control it anymore than someone can control having diabetes. You should educate yourself on something next time before you open your mouth and stick your foot in there.

I am so sorry to hear this Teacher.

I will try and speak to you real soon.

I love you! xx

I'm so sorry to hear about this, teacher.. The only advice I can give you is the words of a friend of mine who is still battling with anorexia: "Don't act like a nurse, just be my friend." (I'm a nurse student, and in my shook state I started asking weird questions from her.. )

I was the first person in her life, who she told about her sickness. She cried against my shoulder for hours.. I held her in my arms and shivered when I felt her thin, bony hands hugging me..

I had no idea, eventhough she's the stereotype of an anorectic: 14-20 yr old girl, good, perfectionist student.. etc.. She went to a hospital specializing in eating-disorder care.. It wasn't until a while ago that I realised just who sick she really is: she had been waiting in line for only a little while, and the minimum waiting time is months.. She got in in a matter of weeks..

One of the worst thing that can happen to an anorectic in this kind of place, is to start enjoying themselves and finding amazing, likeminded friends.. My friend had never EVER taken a sip of alcohol in her life, and suddenly she was braging she could drink her own mother under the table (she had always despised her mother's drinking habits, and when she was little, her mother was once too drunk to pic her up, so she sent a cab..)

One day she then announced that she was leaving the hospital after staying there for about 3-4 months (not nearly enough, healing is a life-long process) and the reason was: the nurses were mean.

Now here comes my guilty confession:
I was really disapointed with her, and I haven't seen her for over a year. I have no idea how she's doing.. I just got really fed-up with her attitude and don't feel comfortable with her.. Am I a total asshole?

From what I've heard from my other friend, she was diagnosed with a bipolar disorder, with manic and depressive phases. She commented on the diagnosis being bullshit. She's gone on and off with many different medications, cause they make her depressed (the reason one should take the WHOLE prescription: side-effects are depression, before they start to kick in!) and has gone cruising and visited thailand..

The only advise I can give you is: be there for her. LISTEN to what she has to say, and eventhough it sounds cruel: don't believe everything they say, be critical. Eventhough it's not your job to make 'em realise the situation they're in, I still think it might be usefull to try and push their buttons a bit, to make them wake up! About 10% of the diagnosed anorectics die, and that's no joke! You have to be cruel to be kind..

Remember: the desease is so deep in they're head, it might take a lifetime to recover.

I really understand the mixed up feelings: guilt, rage, frustration and fear, that you're going to..
I wish you all the strength in the world, and I hope I'll get some too, get courage and go visit my friend..

To all my Org sistas who have/had eating disorders, & the loved ones battling it now

The revelations on this thread are trippy, I'm so glad your gorgeous selves are healthy now!


.
[Edited 9/10/07 15:49pm]

Jen

Thank you everybody ghug:

Hokie for having my back

Mushanga - I may be able to help you in some ways, maybe your friend IS bipolar. I am, if there are questions you want to ask feel free to do so. Thanks for sharing, you shouldn't feel bad for not being able to deal, it's human.

JD, Redbaby, Flowers, Calhoun